Kiss It All Better
by ChayseElric
Summary: TW: Self-Harm, Possible Abuse, Language. Karkat Vantas is the first one to jump on the case when Eridan's father evicts him from his house. But when Karkat offers Eridan a spot for him at his own place, will Karkat learn more about Eridan than he expected? -Humanstuck-
1. Kiss It All Better

I want a night  
with you.  
I want to close  
the curtains.  
I want to lay in bed  
and feel you breathing.  
I want the only noise  
to be my inhale  
replying to your exhale.  
I want to trace my fingers  
along every line and curve  
of your back.  
I want to feel your face  
buried into my neck.  
I want to lay like this  
and feel every worry  
melt  
the same way that I melt  
when I am with you.  
- Unknown

* * *

{K} Your name is Karkat Vantas, and on rainy days much like today, you are staring blankly at your computer screen as you scroll through some pointless news article that you could not give a lesser shit about as you listen to the rain pounding upon roof and windows. You nearly shit yourself in shock when your phone begins blaring some loud ass, mildly irritating ringtone through your apartment before you huff and wrench the damned thing out of your pocket.

{E} Your name is Eridan Ampora, and you are absolutely terrified. You are clutching your snazzy new IPhone 5 tightly against your ear, hearing the annoying buzzing as you await the answer from, possibly your only friend at the moment as you mumble "Please pick up, Please pick up." desperately to yourself. Ugh, weren't you one huge mess of problems.

{K} You bite your lip in utter irritation as you stare at the picture of your close friend Eridan Ampora that flashed across your Blackberry's screen and with a roll of your icy grey eyes, you drag your finger to to press the decline button. Just as soon as your finger reached that blessed button, a wave of guilt washed over you and with a groan you brought the receiver up to your ear, hissing harsher than intended into the microphone,"What!?"

{E} "W-Well aren't you a bottle full of sunshine." You stutter quite obvious that you were on the verge of tears, pathetic really; and the way to talked didn't help the situation either, like a sailor? Yeah. You take a ragged breath in and out before you spoke your next, most desperate words. Ever. "I-I need your help with somethin'..."

{K} Your eyes widened a great amount when you heard the tone of voice that Eridan happened to be using. You knew it well from the times you had spent comforting him in the past. "Are you alright?" Your worry broke the barrier between irritation as you stared at your laptops screen blankly, hoping to god that Eridan wasn't in any danger.

{E} "No; not really..." You break down and all you could manage to do was cry out of your cookie-cutter blue eyes, that were not filled with the spark that they used to hold when you were only a kid. Nobody understood you but Kar, he was the only one who actually cared, not even your Dad seemed to carry the same love for you anymore.

As Eridan's sobs filled the sound barrier at your ear; grey eyes widened as you stood up hurriedly, clutching the phone at your ear tighter as you hurried down the hallway and grabbed your black hoodie. "Eridan, I'll be right over, okay?" You mumble soothingly into the receiver, pressing the end call button as you shoved both your phone and keys into your pocket, running out of the apartment as fast as your legs could take you.

{E} All you managed to say was a vague thank you; knowing that somebody cared for once about a petty boy like yourself was unbelievable. You clutch your head knowing that none of that thinking will help you, and the tears start pouring down your face because you can't think of anything good about yourself.

{K} Fifteen minutes later, you pull into Eridan's driveway, your jaw taut and your lips pulled into a very straight line. You didn't waste any time as you hurry out of your silver Volvo, not bothering to take the keys out of the ignition as you stepped into the pouring rain, all but running to Eridan's door without knocking, your light call of his name echoing off the walls.


	2. Thistle and Weeds

{E} As you hear Kar call your name, you stagger downstairs to where you hear the familiar voice, "Y-You actually came-" you collapse into him, hugging him gently as you rested your head on his shoulder. You just needed to feel the presence of someone, not in a sexual way. But just knowing that another living being was there, for you.

{K} "Of coarse I came, you dumbass." You mumble against Eridan's shoulder as you draw soothing patterns on the back of his black sweater. You pull away slightly, you arm still wrapped around his waist as you pull the sleeve of your hoodie over your hands, wiping his now-drying tears away with the dark fabric. "You're gonna be okay, Eri."

{E} "I hope you're right Kar." No, no you're not going to be okay, the person you trusted the most betrayed you. You manage to smile slightly to show him you were ok, not great, just ok.

{K} I know I'm right Eri." You smile as you hug him against you once again, continuing with the soothing patterns and calming hushes. "If you don't mind me asking, what happened?" You ask, pulling away so you could listen clearly to his answer.

{E} "Well, my father 'evicted' me from here since he owns the property, an' now I have, as of 24 hours to get out of this bloody place." You sighed as you slump your arms to the sides, "I thought he loved me enough to at least deal with my pathetic self, but I guess not?" Another tear made its way out of your bloodshot eyes.

{K} "Hey, you're not the fucking pathetic one here, Eri. He is, for kicking you out with no well thought out reason." You fume, stepping closer and wiping the tears from his face. "Now, how much of your shit do you think we could stuff into my car?"

{E} Your eyes widen immensely in surprise, "You w-would actually do that?" Your eyes sparked in happiness and you smiled ear to ear.

{K} "Why the fuck not? You know well enough that I do have an empty room in my apartment just begging for somebody to take it, and I'm more than happy to let you be that person. Besides, you're great to have around." You shrug your shoulders and find yourself smiling stupidly at the grin spread across Eridan's lips.


	3. A Mess As It Grows

{E} You place the fairly heavy box onto the floor and wipe your forehead with the back of your hand. "I don't know-w how-w many times I w-will hav-ve to thank you Kar, it really means a lot to me, y'know-w." You solemnly smile up at Karkat who was carrying another one of your boxes, "Now-w careful w-with that one, it has fragile things inside!"

{K} "Don't worry about it, you don't even have to thank me because it's not a problem." You smile, placing the box you were carrying onto Eridan's bed. "It's not as if living alone is particularly amazing, and don't worry. I'm not gonna break your shit."

{E} Of course, Kar, just makin' sure." You scratch your head, checking over and over again the list of things you brought here, and hoped you never forgot anything. "I think that's the last of the boxes."

{K} "Well that's good, I'm pretty sure both of us are pretty beat." You chuckled, running a hand through your messy ginger colored hair. "By the way, we can head out later after to grab some paint and shit, I'm pretty sure that this eggshell color is not something you particularly like." You chuckle lightly as you lean against the wall.

{E} You did feel out of place, in this apartment, but it was nice. Of course you wearing the latest trends, skinny jeans, a plain white Gucci T shirt, and a fabulous purple scarf to bring out the now faded purple streak in your hair, "Yeah it w-would be nice to hav-ve a new-w colour in here." You smile broadly at Karkat, who has been quite happy these days, what gives with him anyways?

{K} "Even I hate this color." You mumbled crinkling your nose in light disgust. "Anyways, wanna go out for lunch or something? It's on me."

{E} "Of course, got to show-w off my fabulous new-w clothes, w-wouldn't it be a w-waste of a good outfit? Am I right, or am I right." You smirked at Karkat and adjusted your hipster glasses getting a better view of him, instead of a fishy view.

{K} "You're obviously right." You roll your eyes sarcastically, heading out of Eridan's room with a shrug of your shoulders. You couldn't deny that Eridan did look spectacular today, you shook that thought out of your head and went on a hunt for your car keys.

{E} You had to admit you did look FANTASTIC today; maybe you could give Karkat a little makeover sometime. You hum to yourself thinking about the endless possibilities of styles Karkat would suit; shit he would be really hot. Not that he was already hot, but hotter. You follow him out the door like a lost puppy dog.


	4. Ballad of Mona Lisa

**Karkat Vantas**: "Shit, where the fuck did I put them?" You all but shout, searching for your keys angrily, suddenly not wanting to go out for lunch. Holy hell you just had them less than ten minutes ago, they didn't just grow legs and run off. You find yourself growling at yourself when you discover the hiding place they had created in your back jeans pocket.

**Eridan Ampora**: You snicker at Karkat, "Good job, Kar; hopefully you can find your car or do you think that hid from you too."

**Karkat Vantas**: "Oh, fuck you Ampora." You sneer, debating the idea of leaving the 'Oh Princely One' alone in your house and going out for lunch yourself but you reluctantly shoved that idea off, waiting for Eridan to exit your apartment before you locked it behind the two of you.

**Eridan Ampora**: "W-well fuck you too, grouchy." You frowned slightly but smiled again; now that was normal Kar.

**Karkat Vantas**: "So, what do you want? We can go anywhere really, not like I care." You shrug your shoulders as you walk down the steps and to your car, open your own door before stepping in and reaching over to unlock Eridan's with a quick flick of the wrist. You slammed your door closed and waited for Eridan's response as you fired up the engine.

**Eridan Ampora**: You step into the passenger seat as Karkat started the engine,"W-we could go to Oliv-ve Garden, I heard it's an authentic Italian Restaurant." You smirked and shut your door behind you, not bothering with your seat belt. Who needs seat belts when you have swag.

**Karkat Vantas**: "Sure, whatever you want. I've never actually been there before, so I guess it couldn't hurt." You state with another shrug, glancing cautiously at the unbuckledness of Eridan's seatbelt before you drove the car into reverse, being extra careful not to drive too recklessly. Especially when driving with somebody who obviously didn't care about their own safety.

**Eridan Ampora**: "So, does anyone come and v-visit you on an occasion? Like Sol, Ter? Maybe ev-ven Kan or Gam?" You question hoping not to create an awkward silence, w-while they were sitting there, driving to Olive Garden. You really didn't want to seem like the boring kind.

**Karkat Vantas**: "No, It's usually just me. I barely even speak to them anymore let alone see them. I've seen Sollux multiple times, and Gamzee does show up... quite unexpectedly. But other than that it's been just me." You tell, keeping your eyes carefully on the road as you drive. "Now that you mention it, I probably should hang out with some of them soon, I kinda miss Terezi."

**Eridan Ampora**: "Oh, I see, I see. W-what ev-ven happened w-with you an' her anyw-ways? or is that personal." You look out the window, while asking these questions, he wasn't going to look at you anyways, but you did glance his way to catch his portrait against the beating sun, his ginger hair practically glowing.

**Karkat Vantas**: "It's not that personal, it's just.. I had my suspicions when I found her hanging around Gamzee, and those suspicions ended up to be true when I spoke one on one with Gamzee about it. But now I guess we've passed that stage and we're borderline friends?" You question more than you state as you finally find the parking lot of Olive Garden, smiling lightly as you turn into it, excited to eat something that isn't homemade.

**Eridan Ampora**: You get out of the park car and gently swing the door shut, making your way to the entrance of Olive Garden with Karkat at your side. Opening the door for him kindly and going on in after him. That's when you spot him, your father and your mother sitting at one of the tables by the entrance. The cold hard looks that you get from your parents sent a shiver throughout your whole body. You gulped nervously and exited the restaurant without further notice and not letting Karkat know about your whereabouts. The steps that you took were long and quick ones as you went as far away as you could. and that's when you broke down; letting the tears run down your cheeks like a waterfall. God, weren't you just a worthless, petty thing. Everywhere you go you just turn into a huge mess, how fucking pathetic.


	5. I Write Sins Not Tragedies

**Karkat Vantas**: Fucking shit. Where the hell did Ampora go now? Seconds after Eridan had enter he had casually looked to a table, then turned on his heel and exited without a word. And you, being the curious cat you are, glanced around until you found the reason of Eridan's leave before you let out a long string of curses and exited too, looking around but catching no sight of Eridan's head of blonde hair. "Fuck!" You exclaimed to yourself, earning a disapproving glare from an elderly woman across the way as you pulled your heavily worn Blackberry out of your pocket, scrolling your contacts as quick as you could until you found Eridan's number, pressing the call button and placing the phone at your ear. Your call just left you with no response and you groaned before taking off running down the street, checking every alleyway and back corner until you found the one you were looking for, seated on the ground with his knees pulled up to his chest.

**Eridan Ampora**: You see Karkat, but you ignore him. Keeping your head hung low, out of all of the places, your 'dad' goes to fucking Olive Garden. What, why, and just WHY? You could feel that pocket knife in your pocket that you usually kept with you. It was practically calling for you, but you protested since Karkat was just standing there staring down at you. Fuck, he's probably going to be pissed. You hung your head lower, wanting to escape.

**Karkat Vantas**: You approach Eridan slowly, keeping the expression on your face sullen and confused as you stood in front of him. You knelt down in front of him, placing a wary hand on his knee as he hid his face from you. "Eri?" You whisper comfortingly, rubbing soothing circles into his knee as you just sat there in silence. After a while of him not moving, you lean over his knees and wrap your arms around his torso, pulling him against you with a comforting sigh. "You're going to be okay, Eri. We'll go somewhere else if you want to. Anything to keep you away from them." You mumble against his shoulder as you pat his back.

**Eridan Ampora**: You raise an eyebrow at him staying stiff as a board, you weren't used to this kind of attention, usually you were always alone. The only reason why you acted like such an arrogant douche bag was because you didn't want to be that depressed boy, who always was in a sad mood; and you were pretty much living up to that image now. You remained silent, not sure what to say in these kind of situations. How do people do this?

**Karkat Vantas** Eridan's unresponsiveness began concern you as you pulled away from the embrace you had him cornered in. "Let's get out of here, maybe go to Starbucks and get a little was starting to something from there. We could always go out for dinner later." you smiled, offering a hand down to Eridan's still stiff form.

**Eridan Ampora**: Hesitating to answer his questions, you look up at Karkat and nodded your head solemnly. Taking his hand in yours and getting back up, "That w-would be great." You answer quietly, not sure if you should let go of karkat's hand yet.

**Karkat Vantas**: You don't actually try to pull your hand away from Eridan's as you walk down the street together, your arms swinging silently between the two of you. Eridan's eyes were red and slightly puffy, so you could already tell that he had been crying. You'd have to remind yourself to talk to him when you returned to your house. "I think we should just walk, if you don't mind? It's a nice day and Starbucks isn't that far away."

**Eridan Ampora**: "I agree." Words just weren't your friend today, or at the moment anyways. Your face turns bright red when you realize that Karkat was actually letting you hold hands with him, you look to the side, avoiding eye contact with Kar.

**Karkat Vantas**: You only dare to let to of Eridan's hand when you hold the door open for him, smiling lightly as you caught the light blush that crossed his cheeks, before you shove your hands in your pocket; Ordering yourself one of those Frappuccino things that Dave had recently got you obsessed with. "What are you ordering, Eri?"

**Eridan Ampora**: "I'll get a vanilla bean, with one marshmallow on top please." Words. Words would be nice right about now. All that came out of your mouth were very vague. You mimic Kar and place your hands in your pocket, nonchalantly shrugging to yourself.

**Karkat Vantas**: "You really love marshmallows don't you, Eridan. Should I add marshmallows to the things that we need to purchase on a regular basis now that you are living with me?" You question jokingly, stealing an unoccupied table and pull him down beside you with a light laugh.

**Eridan Ampora**: You really liked this happy Karkat, usually he was just a little shit ninety percent of the time. "Of course I lov-ve marshmallows Kar, a matter of fact maybe my room should be marshmallow colour." You roll your eyes, and blush faintly. You were getting better.

**Karkat Vantas**: "Well you know. Marshmallow color would be ten times more interesting than the eggshell that is currently brandishing your walls." You roll your eyes with a light smile crossing your lips.

* * *

**Okay, so being the little shit I am, I neglected to post that this is actually an ongoing roleplay, between me and one of my best friends Brianna. I'm just gradually editing it to be more fitting in fanfiction form. If you guys want to stop reading that's alright.**


	6. Carry On

**Eridan Ampora**: Getting the last bit of eggshell colour off of your walls, and replaced it with a light purple. "Thanks again Kar, I really like this colour." You smugly smiled at him, wiping at your sweaty forehead leaving a stripe of purple on your pale skin, not acknowledging that you did.

**Karkat Vantas:** You smirk lightly at the streak that crossed Eridan's forehead, deciding not to tell him about it as you laughed lightly. "Don't worry about it. I sadly actually like this color. You shrug lightly as you place your paintbrush down, just about ready to scavenge your house for food.

**Eridan Ampora**: You jumped a bit when you heard party in the USA coming from your ass. Quickly, you grab it and look at the caller ID; it was your Dad. You start breathing heavily and answered it. All you could here was Karkat leave as the hateful words processed through your mind. Horrible kid; waste of time; stupid; pathetic and not to forget worthless piece of shit. You start tearing up, and ended the call not saying a word in response. Grabbing your trusty pocket knife itch a shaky hand, the tear and snot coming down your face as you place the blade against your skin. You couldn't take it anymore, you needed to do this.

**Karkat Vantas: **You mindlessly searched through the many aisles of food that lined the walls of this market you came to quite often to get necessities. You felt slightly bad for leaving Eridan alone at home by himself, he's going through a tough time. God only knows what he could to to himself if you were not there to stop him. No, you weren't going to think of that. Eridan was going to be just fine.

**Eridan Ampora**: All you could think about was Karkat and how horrible it was going to be to not be able to see him again. But you just needed to escape this hell of a world. You grab a piece of paper from one of your boxes and used a small brush to write down the message, "Goodbye Kar, thank you so much for everything, but it is time to part ways." You hesitate to add the last part in already shaking from all of the tears you shed, "I love you and I'm so proud of you." The knife drove into your skin multiple of times, you smiled at the pain as you closed your eyes and dreamed on.

**Karkat Vantas:** A bad intuition was what forced you to shove the last remaining items into your basket and head off towards the checkout, shuffling back and forth on your feet as you did so. When you got your total, you quickly paid the unimpressed-looking cashier before grabbing your things and jogging out to your car. The feeling all but intensified as you kicked the engine into gear and bolted as legally as you could out of the parking lot. You left your groceries in the car, wanting to check on Eridan before you moved everything inside. As you entered your apartment the silence of it shocked you. You would have expected Eridan to be listening to music or something. "Eridan?" You called into the hollow seeming house as you crossed your carpet, not bothering to take your shoes off. With a slight tinge of hesitation, you pulled Eridan's door open. "Eri-?"

**Eridan Ampora**: You faintly hear Karkat's voice but you couldn't see him through your hipster glasses. The blood flowed at a heavy pace down your arm and laced around your fingers, dripping onto the floor. You were slouched against your bed un made bed on the floor, your head hung low. The knife slipped out of your hand as you were also slipping.

**Karkat Vantas:** You step into Eridan's room cautiously as you look around, catching no sight of him. When you finally catch a glance of Eridan's head of hair, you notice that he is slouched against his bed, his legs splayed out on the floor. "Must've fallen asleep." You say to yourself slowly making your way to the other side of his bed before your eyes widened in a shocked surprise. His pocket knife shimmered silver and dark red from the blood that was covering the blade. With a swift movement you slide off your belt, dropping to your knees beside him, not minding that you were probably staining your newest pair of jeans as you tied your belt over his elbow, trying to stop the bleeding the best as you could before you tugged your shirt over your head, wrapping it tightly over his cuts before you pulled out your phone and called 911.

**Eridan Ampora**: "Kar, please." The words took the last bit of your energy as you fell un conscience. Leaving your other hand to drop by your note that you especially made for him.

**Karkat Vantas: **You shook your head as you crawled closer, pulling the bleeding out man close to your chest as you felt angry tears flow to your eyes. Thoughts were running through your mind at a very unhealthy rate as you held him close, listening to the slowing of his breathing as you tried your hardest not to break down. What would bring Eridan to this? Harming yourself for some reason unknown? But come to think of it that was probably why he was acting oddly earlier I'm the day. But right now you couldn't bring yourself to care. All you cared about was getting Eridan to safety and keeping him alive.

**Eridan Ampora**: Feeling Kar's body heat around you, you felt guilty of this all. He probably went through a lot of this shit. But you wanted this, you needed this. You felt yourself drifting away into nothingness when the paramedics showed up and took away.

**Karkat Vantas:** You nearly threw a tantrum when the doctor denied your request to enter the room with Eridan, claiming that they needed to give him a once over before anybody did any visiting. So you sat in the hallway, sitting on the cold linoleum with your knees pulled up to your chest. This could NOT be happening. You wanted to scream and shout, telling the doctors to stop, you wanted to be gone. Long gone from here. You weren't afraid of dying, you wanted it to happen. You didn't need to be fixed, you were already broken too much to be patched up. Your head snapped up when the nurses and doctors that had entered with Eridan exited with sympathetic expressions across their features. The black haired doctor knelt down to your level, placing an approving hand on your shoulder. He looked at you with his deep chocolate brown eyes, smiling lightly. "You did the right thing." He stated nudging towards the door with his chin. "You knew exactly what to do when it came to being able to stop the blood, and he's alive because of that. So good job." He nodded his head as he assisted you to your feet. "We're keeping him here a few days; suicide watch. But you can see him now if you'd like."

**Eridan Ampora**: You awake slowly, opening one eye at a time. Blinking rapidly getting used to the bright hospital lights. Your arm was bandaged fairly well; you just wanted to rip them off. You were frustrated with yourself, this was your second attempt and you failed again. There's got to be a better way to get out of this hell. A scowl crossed your face in disgust, how stupid of you.

**Karkat Vantas:** With a frown, you twist the doorknob to Eridan's room, one of your fists clenched at your side. "Eridan?" You whispered, before stepping into the bright lights that surrounded you. Fuck, you were going to have to call Cronus later. The poor guy was going to have a heart attack. You approach Eridan's bedside, taking note of the scowl across his lips as you pulled up a chair beside him, glancing at his hand before taking it in your own. "Eri?.. Why?"

**Eridan Ampora**: "W-why not, its not like it matters to anyone else, nobody giv-ves a damn about me anyw-ways." you vaguely, closing your eyes not wanting to look at Karkat. The guilt was strong within you. Your cheeks glowed a little because of how flustered you were.

** Karkat Vantas:** "You think nobody cares about you..? Well news flash. I do. And I always have. You may thing nobody gives a flying fuck but I do. Eridan, you're an even closer friend to me than Gamzee is and I think you're fucking great. Despite how much of an asshole you can be at times, you're amazing. And did you even think about Cronus? You're his world Eridan. What do you think he'd do if he lost you?" You stated, your thumb smoothing over the back of Eri's hand as you frowned deeply. Wishing that Eridan would just understand how much you cared and... Loved him.

**Eridan Ampora**: You groan and shift your head to avoid looking at Karkat. Your whole face was burning up, "Oh." That was the only thing you could manage to say as the tears started pouring out, sort of like a waterfall on your face. You looked horrible when you started sobbing like this, it was all snotty and your sinuses started puffing up. You were a god-awful mess.

** Karkat Vantas: **"Hey hey hey. No." You mumble, crawling over the chair and onto the bed beside Eridan, settling beside him as you wrapped a careful arm around his torso, pulling him against your side as you brushed his hair back slightly. "You're going to be alright Eridan, you just gotta be strong." You mumbled as you grab hold of his now bandaged arm and brought it up to your face. "And no more of this." You mumble, pressing a kiss to every cut through the bandages.

**Eridan Ampora**: The tears started pouring down your face harder, using your free hand you wipe your nose. Not bothering to wipe away the tears, "I'm so sorry Kar; I'm so sorry that I'm not strong enough for you." You sniffled a bit wiping your nose again so often.

** Karkat Vantas: **With a light smile you lean over and swipe your hands under his eyes, wiping the falling tears from his pale skin, your eyes widening lightly before a light smile laced your features when you found a residue of Eridan's skin color on your hand, revealing a light dusting of freckles that he was attempting to cover up with said foundation. "Eridan, you're more than strong enough for me. You're a fucking warrior. You just gotta believe you are."

**Eridan Ampora**: "You don't understand Kar, it's hard; havin the person that you thought you trusted, abuse you verbally and physical for all your life. I just thought it would get better but it didn't, he only loved Cronus and that was it." You bit your lip to stop yourself from crying, but you bit it too hard and the taste of blood rushed through your mouth.

** Karkat Vantas: ** "Eridan.. Why didn't you tell me sooner? I would have tried to be there for you more often than I was." You bit your lip, guilt that should not be there surging through your body. "But Eri, I'm here now. And I'm planning on staying, so hold your chin up and smile, because I'm going to make it known that you are definitely worth it." You give playful wink, trying to earn a smile out of him.

**Eridan Ampora**: "Oh Kar-Senpai, swoon." You dramatically place your hand to your forehead and fan yourself jokingly. A smile spreading across your face and also a burning red because of how cute he looked.

** Karkat Vantas: **You laugh lightly and fall back into his pillows, making no movement to break the hold between both of your hands. You scoot over slightly and place your head on his shoulder, his scarf making for a perfect pillow. "You know, you're really comfortable." You mumble, snaking your arm around his neck and cuddling into his warmth.

**Eridan Ampora**: You snuggle into him, resting your cheek on his head finding comfort. "We are comfortable." You practically purr. A few minutes later you fell asleep in his arms, you felt safe in his arms, welcome. While in your sleep you moved to your side and hugged his torso and softly snored.

** Karkat Vantas: ** When you knew Eridan was fully asleep, you struggled to escape his grip, finally managing to escape without stirring the extremely tired man from his much needed sleep. With a smirk you reach over and begin to unwrap the uncomfortable scarf from around his neck, also careful not to stir him. When you finally remove the scarf you drop it to the end-table beside his bed, smiling slightly before leaning down to press a kiss do his cheek, and that's when you saw it. Vertical scars criss-crossing from the middle of his neck and that's when you finally began to cry. You placed a hand on the side of face and slipped into your chair, leaning forward just enough to rest your cheek on his stomach. "I'm so sorry."

**Eridan Ampora**: Your dreaming turned out for the worse. Flashes of the past flashed before you and you tossed and turned trying to find peace. Pictures of your dad's scowling face popped up multiple of times and you shuddered. You couldn't deal with all of the bad memories. You suddenly woke up with sweat dripping down your face, heavily breathing.

** Karkat Vantas: **After wiping the tears from your face, you pulled your Blackberry out of your pocket, going through your contacts as you sniffled. When you reached the person you needed to get a hold of, you stood up and pressed the dial button, sniffling once more as you made your way out into the hallway, listening to the irritating ring of the dial tone. You nearly sighed in relief when you heard the familiar "Hey Chief " echo through the receiver in a tired tone. "Yeah hey." You mumble nervously, kicking the ground underneath your feet as the sounds of the hospital surround you. "Something vwrong, doll?" He drawls into the phone, the rustling of him getting out of bed very noticeable. "Eridan's done it again. Cronus." You state exasperated into the microphone, sniffling once again. "Vwhat?" He exclaimed, the sound of something dropping echoing noticeably. "He's fine, Cro. But I think it would be best if you came down here for a few hours. He really needs to be watched, and I really need sleep." You mumble, running a hand through your ginger hair. "Vwhat room?" He questioned, the jangling of keys evident. "713." "Be right there." As another unwanted tone rung through your ear you locked the screen and headed back to Eridan's room. Now facing a fully awake and scared looking Eridan.

**Eridan Ampora**: You and Kar just stare at each other, a look of sheer horror spread across your face and a very tired Kar staring back. You lay down again and pull the hospital sheets over your shaking body. "I just want to be normal, maybe even a little bit humane, that would be nice." You mumble to yourself; You heard Kar but you ignored him, still in shock from your dream, you've never had that dream before and you were really scared.

** Karkat Vantas:** With a frown you walked over you Eridan's bedside. For the second time that night sliding in beside him, even slipping under the covers because you needed comfort. You wrapped your arms around his shaking frame and rested your head on his chest. "Go back to sleep Eridan." You mumble, rubbing soothing circles on his back. But boy, did you nearly shit yourself when you remembered you forgot your Ice Cream in the back seat of your car. That shit was going to be fucking everywhere.

**Eridan Ampora**: "I'm scared to Kar..." You shiver iin his arms, sniffling. You ended up sleeping anyways, you felt safe in his arms, and your mind was clear of all the horrors that terrorized your dreams. It seemed that you slept better in Kar's arms, it felt nice for once.

** Karkat Vantas:**You managed to keep yourself awake long enough for Cronus to arrive. You explain what had happened before he practically forced you into the empty bed opposite of Eridan's. With a tired groan you collapsed onto the bed and fell asleep quicker than ever.

**Eridan Ampora**: You were in a fairy tale, placed in a ballroom painted purple, ceiling to floor. Everything was purple, even your formal attire was head to toe purple. So much fucking purple, but a person in yellow stood out, it was Karkat. Why purple and yellow? It was a mystery that nobody knew. You two met in the middle of the dance floor, both taking position automatically and dancing away. Everything felt good, you both smiled at each other happily; you really didn't want to wake up from this dream.

** Karkat Vantas:** You woke up to a ray of god awful sun shining in through a crack in the blinds. Making you want to blind yourself so you could get ten more minutes of sleep. But you knew you wouldn't be able to do that in the first place when somebody warmer curled up beside you, wrapping their arms around your waist and pressing a chin against your neck. When Eridan's scent attacks you at all angles, you can't help but smile. "Hi."

**Eridan Ampora**:"W-well hello there." You say in a sweet tone of voice. Exaggerating your stutter, but only a LITTLE bit. A huge smile spreading across your face. You were obviously feeling a lot better today. "What are you even doing over here?" You question before rolling over in his arms so you were facing him. You peeked over his shoulders and chuckled when you saw Cronus sprawled out on Eridan's bed, taking up the space that Eridan was previously occupying. "Oh, well I guess that answers that question." You smile, resting your head against his chest. You chuckle , "Yeah, I w-wasn't really expectin him to show-w up-" You were cut off by your hospital room door opened with a big bang. Your head snaps in that direction. You almost had a heart attack when you see the un-wanted and familiar figure step through the door, "D-dad?"


	7. Royals

**Karkat Vantas:** You pull away from Eridan as fast as you could, sitting up as straight as a plank as you stared in disgust at all six feet of Eugene Ampora. "What are you, -out of all people- doing here?" You hiss in his direction, hoping that Cronus would be a god and wake the fuck up as soon as possible. As you watched the older Ampora approach the side of Eridan's bed, and caught the way Eridan cowered away from his motion, you sprung forward, putting up a barrier of yourself between the two of them. "And just what do you think you're doing?" You growl, glaring at him with your icy blue eyes. "I'm going to have a price conversation with my son." He growls right back, his eyes showing a look of pure hatred that made your skin crawl. But as he rose a hand to push you to the side you reacted on impulse and within seconds pinned him up against the wall with your forearm pressed against his jugular.

**Eugene Ampora:** "Don't test me boy." The man growled under his breath. He grabbed Karkat's forearm and twisted it right around, pushing him away, "You little shit; how do you expect to out fight me." The eldest Ampora strode to his sons bed and grabbed his neck, racking his yellow nails against his skin, "Now this little shit, maybe do me and everyone else a favour, and kill yourself already!" He practically shouts in Eridan's face and pushed him harshly against his pillow.

**Karkat Vantas:** With a growl and a throbbing arm you hissed through your teeth, striding over to the edge of Cronus's bed and giving it a firm kick before returning to glare at Eugene. "I suggest leaving right now. Eridan doesn't deserve this shit, being from his 'Dad' or anyone. You need to leave." You growl, almost jumping forward again when you felt a hand on your shoulder that could be identified as Cronus. "I agree vwith Vantas, you need to leave Dad." Cronus defended taking one step in front of you. "And if you don't want him this bad. Sign his rights off to me. Because I'd sure as hell take care of him better than you could." "Don't talk to me like that in that tone of voice you bastard." He swung a hard hit towards the young Vantas, the sound echoing around the room.

**Eugene Ampora:** "C'mon, Cro, I thought you were better than this. Remember what I taught you when you were a youngling, don't befriend the weak, and never stand up for anybody but yourself. How will you become successful with that attitude!" The elder huffed and puffed with anger as his face boiled a bright red.

**Karkat Vantas:** "I don't care vwhat taught me vwhen I vwas younger Dad. You are harming my little brother and one of my best friends!" Cronus shouted, helping you back into a standing position, allowing you to lean against him as you stood with pure instability "Please, Dad. Just leave and sign Eridan's rights away. I'm pretty sure all of us vwould be happier that vway." Cronus finishes your sentence and wraps a steady hand around your shoulder, bringing a slight comfort to your terrified state. Well, that turned out differently than you expected. "It's a good point, if you insist I'll fuckin do it." He growls under his breath, "The quicker the better.." Eridan sighs in relief, hope filling up within him.

**Eridan Ampora:** You get up and stand by Kar, wrapping your arm around his waist and pulling him away from Cro and closer to you; you just needed to be close to him. For both of your guys' sake.

**Karkat Vantas:** "Dad, you and I can head out right now to do this. It vwould be best to get this done as soon as possible." Cronus states, dragging his Dad by the arm away from you and Eridan, you once again fighting back oncoming tears as you bury yourself in Eridan's chest, your face throbbing intensely as you tangle your fingers in his hair. You wait until the both of them had exited the room before you collapse into Eridan. Your breathing slowly turning into sobs. "You finally get to be happy, Eri."

**Eridan Ampora:**You cry along with Karkat, wrapping your arms around his neck and burrowed your face into it. "Thank you Kar." Your words were muffled but you could still make them out. Your neck was bleeding but you really didn't care at the moment. You broke the tender embrace and gently placed your hands on the side of his head, "But, are you okay? I know-w my dad has a strong hit.."

**Karkat Vantas:** "I don't know." You mumble, just wanting to fall against Eridan's chest and never leave again. You've always wanted to confront the oldest Ampora, and tell him that the way he is treating his children is unacceptable, and that nobody deserves that sort of treatment but you never once knew what he was capable of, Eridan never once told you about anything his father had done to him, and now you were just itching to know, but you decided against prying on it for right now as you place a shaking hand over Eridan's. "I'm proud of you." You whisper, trailing a finger along the side of Eridan's jawbone.

**Eridan Ampora: **You breakdown at the last line he spoke and crashed into him your arms wrapping around his neck yet again, "I'm so proud of you too Kar.." Your words barely above a whisper. You'd never seen anyone stand up for you, not even Fef who's mama was more powerful than your dad. She would've taken him down easily, but her mama wasn't that kind of person. Either way, Fef ditched you at a time you needed your best friend, comes to show how feelings come and go. Bt now, you have someone who actually cares for you. You felt happy again, you've never felt this happy since you were only a wee lass. You smile lightly and press a barely-there kiss to the tip of his chin, not making eye contact but not willing to break the hold you had on him.

**Karkat Vantas:** You understand now what you had been missing when you went weeks without human contact because it was fucking great. "My face hurts." You groan, placing your hands against Eridan's shoulder blades as you whine in discomfort.

**Eridan Ampora: **"Hmm, let me see.." You put your hand on the bottom of his chin, lifting it up and turning it in your direction. The bruise you saw on his jaw looked nasty, but not like the bruises he had all over his coved body. "It seems you hav-ve a broken jaw, Kar." You frown slightly, "It will hurt for quite a while; not much I can do about it lov-ve.. "Ah shit." You groan and lean into Eridan's hand.

**Karkat Vantas:** "Can we go back to sleep? I'm pretty sure Cro will wake me up when they return. But Jesus shit am I tired." You moaned as you leant against him. Soon enough the two of you ended up passed out on the highly uncomfortable hospital bed in a tangle of limbs.

**Eridan Ampora: **The knight and his prince, danced alone together in a purple castle. Dressed in purple and yellow they meshed together in an awful colour scheme but that was ok, since they were heads over heels for each other, they both were having a grand time, I bet neither one of them wanted to escape this fairy tale.

**Karkat Vantas:** You woke up to a light shake to your shoulders and with a yawn you untangled yourself from Eridan, turning to face the smiling face of Cronus. "You gotta sign this Vantas." He chuckled handing you a piece of paper and a pen as he dragged the table closer to you and with neat haste, you sketched your name down on the specified line, your smile continuing as you finished up and handed the paper back to Cronus. "Congrats' chief. He's all yours from here on out and there ain't anythin' that Dad can do about it."

**Eridan Ampora: **You woke up to the door being closed not so quietly; you moaned and sat up next to Karkat, "Hey, how-w's your face feelin'?" Of course that's the first thing you say to him, "I can go get some ice for it if its really buggin' you that much." You don't say anything to Eridan, just smile down at him and brush the bangs from his face, dragging your finger down his neck and towards the ending of the rows of scars without faltering your smile. "This isn't going to happen anymore Eridan, because you're mine now. And you're a free soul." You whisper happily, resting your hand softly on his neck as you continue to smile. A huge grin spread across your face as you tackled Kar into a bear hug. Tears of joy streaming down your face, you kiss his cheek with so much excitement. "Thank you, thank you, thank you times a million; you have no idea how-w much I lov-ve you." You practically squeal like one of those school girls. You were finally free.

**Karkat Vantas:** "Love?.. I've never been told that word before." You frown, looking at your hands and avoiding Eridan's eyes at all costs, to keep yourself from breaking down once again. "I never even heard it from my brother, Kankri." You furrow your eyebrows and begin to focus on your hands more than your words as tears welled once again and you let out a light sniffle, leaning your head into Eridan chest.

**Eridan Ampora: **"Oh, Kar.." You pull him in closer and stroke his lovely, ginger hair. "They must still lov-ve you." You reassure him, placing a slight kiss on the top of his head. You wonder what the Vantas household was like. Was it too crowded with two sisters and a brother, or was it just one of those families who have communication errors? You burrow your brow as you go more into thought.

**Karkat Vantas:** "Shit no, my Dad was much like like yours. And I guess that's where I got my social anxiety and my overreacting. He was always very verbal about everything. Not afraid to state what was on his mind when it was on his mind. He loved Meulin and Nepeta. But he never once told me he loved me, or that he was proud of me. Before Mom died, me and my Dad were pretty close, but after he took out most of his anger on me, wether it be from work or something my sisters had done. I really sucked. During that period and even now I have extreme anxiety and depression issues. I guess I've never told you the reason I always were sweaters, but I'm leaving this amount of info for you to put the puzzle pieces together." You sigh shakily, bunching up a portion of Eridan's shirt in your hands. God, this was the most you've told anyone about yourself. And it sorta felt great.

**Eridan Ampora: **A look of shock replaced your concentrating glance. "Please don't tell me that's true, oh god Kar.." You hug him so fucking hard. The tears of joy turned into empathetic tears in 0.1 seconds. "I'm so proud of you for stayin this strong for so long. And to think you hav-be to deal wwith evveryones shit all of the time."

**Karkat Vantas:**"You're not the only one who wishes it wasn't true Eridan. I fucking hate myself because of literally everything. My Dad almost sent me into a psychiatric hospital multiple times because he thought what I was doing was driving me insane. It's not only my arms either, my stomach, legs, shoulders you name it. It was literally any area that I could reach got scarred." You pull lightly away from Eridan and tug the sleeves of your sweater up, revealing the thin, straight, pink-faded lines of scar-tissue that trailed in every which direction. "But my stomach did the worst damage. Everything my father said to me, that hurt I'm any way shape of form got etched into my skin." You lifted your shirt lightly to only show him what he needed to see before the tears started falling once again. "Holy fuck I'm such a horrible person."

**Eridan Ampora:**"No, no, no, please don't say that, you are an amazing individual and -I love you-. It does not matter about the scars on your skin nor the bruises you have endured, just know that someone loves you, someone that you can trust, is out there somewhere, and that person is right next to you; forever and always. Please do not think of yourself as anything less than perfect; please." You embrace him yet again with so much love and tenderness that you might just have another breakdown.

**Karkat Vantas:** You wipe your tears away and sniffle sadly, still leaning against him as if he was your life support, the only thing keeping your incredibly thin string from snapping as you were being attacked by knives and scissors. "I'm telling you this because I'm not fully over it yet, Eridan."

**Eridan Ampora: **"I don't blame you, Kar. But, I promise I will guide you to happier times of things and I will try to fix you. Even if you are already as perfect can be." You stroke his face, catching the tears as they fell down and wiping them a way. "I promise, please don't cry, everything is going to be alright."

**Karkat Vantas:** "And I shall do my best at returning the favor, my prince." You smile through the tears and press a soft kiss to his nose, before diving back into the hug.

**Eridan Ampora: **"Of course, my knight, but you've done too much for me. I think it shall be the princes turn to protect and serve now." You plant a soft kiss on his forehead and rub his back soothingly.

**Karkat Vantas:** "More like haven't done enough yet " You smile and pull away from the hug, sniffling before sliding off the bed. "Well I'm going to have a talk with , I want to get out of here today before the ice cream starts to ferment in the back of my car." Smirking lightly you blow a kiss to Eridan as you exit the room. Oh god, you think you've found the one.

**Eridan Ampora: **You smirked at Karkat, what a dork; what an incredibly cute dork. You lay back down again, somehow feeling exhausted. Probably from staying in bed for a really long time just drains everything from you. You shut your eyes and take one last nap on this hospital bed.

**Karkat Vantas:** You laugh lightly as you return to Eridan's room, seeing him sprawled out across the pillows like it was nobody's business. You had been given the approval of Kurloz to get out of there as soon as needed, as long as you watched Eridan with careful eyes. And after agreeing you were free to go home. You didn't even bother with trying to wake him up, you just shoved your keys and phone into your back pocket before pulling him into your arms effortlessly as you praise the lord you only live a block away.

**Eridan Ampora: ** You couldn't even feel Karkat hoisting you up over his shoulders; that's how dead asleep you were. Karkat plopped you on your bed when you got home, how nice. You automatically went into a fetal position and peacefully went to sleep. It was probably the best sleep you got in a long time.

**Karkat Vantas:** Well wasn't today quite eventful for the both of you. You sigh as you drop yourself down on the leather couch. Sleep was about to overcome you when the basic tone of your phone began to blare the song of its people, causing you to groan and fish it out of your pocket, not bothering to look at the caller ID before you pressed the receiver to your ear. "Hello?" You all but groan, pulling yourself into a sitting position. "Afternoon Karkat. Surprised you haven't offed yourself yet." The voice of your father sends a shiver down your spine and you straightened immediately with a squeak. "D-Dad?" You question, your eyes wide and terrified. "That's to you, boy." He hissed, causing you to flinch away. "Sorry, . Why are you calling?" You questioned, your eyes squeezed shut. "Well, Kankri has arranged a family get together. Meulin, Nepeta, Kankri will be there. And to my dismay. Kankri wants you to join us. Though I'm sure he doesn't really want you there." Your Dad informed, his voice cold and dark as usual, not shocking you but making the urge to cry evident. "What day is it?" You question, hiding the crack in your voice behind a light cough. "Wednesday." "Alright, I'll see what I have planned for that day. But if I'm not busy I'll come." Your Dad didn't even respond before he growled. "Bye freak." Before hanging up. Your eyes stung as you dropped your phone on the couch, silently standing up and heading to your bathroom, making sure that your blades were tucked into the medicine cabinet before you locked yourself in.

Eridan Ampora; Shit, you needed to take a piss. Really badly. You rushed out of bed, walking fast to the bathroom; you knock on the door, seeing that it was closed,"Kar, you in there?" You knock on the wooden door frantically.

Karkat Vantas: Fucking shit. You picked a completely wrong time to break. You hissed to yourself under your breath as you pull your sleeve over your bleeding arm, with a hiss of pain and a groan due to another stained sweater. "I'll be out in a second Eridan." You state sadly, all but forgetting to clean up after yourself as you exit the bathroom, not lifting your head to look up at Eridan as you walk past him and rush to your bedroom.

**Eridan Ampora:**"Kar..-" you frown at his sullen face. You close the door and look at the sink, shit. Quickly, you go to the bathroom, clean the blood up from the sink and blade, stuffing the blade in your pocket. Checking the cupboards and medicine cabinet for any other blades he would've stuffed in there too. To avail there were, you stuff them all in your pocket. Going back to your bedroom and disposing them.

Karkat Vantas; You didn't even bother with treating your wounds, because what was the use? They were only going to be reopened sometime in the near fitter so what did it matter if you left them untreated and bleeding. Tears began to stain your feathered pillow as you lay face down in the soft cushion. As far as you could tell your arm was bleeding through the fabric of your shirt and leaking onto your sheets, but you couldn't bring yourself to care.

Eridan Ampora; After disposing the blades you rush to Karkats room, ripping the door open; you were quickly at Karkats side, "Kar, w-why?" You take off your shirt, revealing all of the bruises and cuts from yourself and your dad, and wrap it around Karkats arm trying to stop the bleeding, "Oh god, I am so sorry."

**Karkat Vantas:** All you can do is sit there and cry as Eridan wraps his shirt around your arm, apologizing profusely as you sit frozen, unable to speak as tHe tears drop from your eyes. You stared unseeing at his chest as your eyes become blurry and your gaze drops to the stained sheets below you. Sobs wracking your body once again as you collapse into a heap on your bed.

**Eridan Ampora:**Unable to control yourself. You rush back into the bathroom, knowing you saw bandages in there. You got the bandages and rushed back into his room. Cleaning up the blood with your shirt, you put the actual bandages around his arm. "It's okay Kar, everythin' is going to be ok." You put his head on your lap, stroking his hair out of his face.

**Karkat Vantas:** You take a few minutes to gain the courage you need to put your weary voice to test. Your whole body is shaking as you roll over and bury your face in the exposed skin of his stomach, just enjoying his warmth as you shook. "I don't think you're right on that one Eri." You mumble clenching your fists in your bed sheets, controlling your sobs as best as you could. "I keep fucking things up so my future doesn't seem to be too bright as far as I can see."

**Eridan Ampora:**"Please don't say that, you're as bright as can be, and your future is ten times brighter." You continue to stroke his hair. You wish everything would just be better, just like your dreams, dancing and smiling in a grand ballroom.

**Karkat Vantas:** You sit upright and pull away from Eridan, rising to your feet as you begin pacing nervously. "Fucking shit." You hiss, tangling your fingers in your hair. "What happened here Eridan." You fume, pointing to your arm. "Is called fucking up, and I really don't want you to see me like this." You sigh, wiping your eyes as you slid down onto your knees. God, don't you wish that this could just end.

**Eridan Ampora: **There were tears in your eyes when you stood up watching Karkat pace around his room. "I'm sorry, Kar, I'll leave if you want." You quickly got out of the room, you couldn't deal with anything at the moment. Karkat needed a moment for himself, and you got rid of his blades, so you felt reassured about his safety. You put a different shirt on and headed out the door, you just needed fresh air and Karkat needed space.

**Karkat Vantas:** You sigh as you wrap your fingers in your hair. You didn't mean for Eridan to leave, you just didn't want him to see how pathetic you were when you were this upset. Eridan's shirt was still on your bed and you grabbed it in your hands as you lay down. Tears beginning to fall once again when you buried your face in the slightly bloody shirt, Eridan's scent bringing you a slight amount of comfort.

**Eridan Ampora: **You still had the blade in your pocket. You grabbed it and squeezed it in your palm. The busyness of the city made you feel isolated from everyone else. You turned into a dark alleyway sliding down the mucky brick walls. The tears came pouring down your face as you placed the blade on your other arm that wasn't bandaged.

**Karkat Vantas:** When the tears stopped falling that's when you began to panic. Where had Eridan gone? You dropped his shirt upon your pillow and picked up your phone, dialling his number as fast as you could as you rushed out of your room and pulled your converse over your feet. "Please pick up." You quickly rush to the bathroom to put away your blades and nearly dropped your phone. Eridan had taken your blades.

**Eridan Ampora: **There was a lot of blood, scarlet was all over your arms. So you moved to your torso. You traced along the ragged scar that covered half of your stomach. When you were done you pulled down your black shirt over it and closed your eyes. You were so done with everything.

**Karkat Vantas:** When Eridan walked through the door a hour later despite the way he had his arms crossed over his chest, you knew he'd done it again. You could feel it in your gut. Just by the look in his eyes and the way he was holding himself with instability. It all added up and you couldn't bring yourself to say anything. You knew that your jaw had slackened, and that your breathing had become incredibly shallow. Instead of interrogating him, all you did was grab his hand and pull him towards the couch, sitting him down beside you. His eyes were rimmed red and his face was tear stained. How could a man who seems so strong, become so fragile, so.. pained? You decided not to think about it anymore as you pulled him closer to you, leaning him against your chest and holding him tight. He had resisted at first, but eventually gave in. He began to cry into your shoulder and you knew no words were necessary. All Eridan wanted was for somebody to be there for him as he broke down.

* * *

**Okay, I'm really sorry. This chapter was extremely horrible to lay out, because it had saved in one huge chunk of text, so I had to edit it into separate parts. So if any of you see any sentences that SHOULD NOT be in that POV please tell me and I'll fix it as soon as possible. **


	8. Clarity

**Before I begin, I'd like to say that I am extremely sorry. We lost half of the information we had on the rp and I had to improv for the beginning of this because we already had it finished and ugh. So it might not make sense but if you have any questions PM me or something. **

**Karkat Vantas**: You frowned when you lost the feeling of Eridan's presence beside you. Not knowing where he had gone, you resulted in whining out for him, stealing the warm spot which he had

**Eridan Ampora**: "I'm takin' a fuckin' piss hold on a second!" You literally yelled from the bathroom when you heard Karkat's whining. When you finished up you went back into his room and collapsed on the bed re-tangling yourself with Karkat sighing in relief because of how comfortable you were.

**Karkat Vantas**: You smiled and nestled yourself against his chest once again. "Could we like, never get out of bed. Because this is fucking great." You chuckled groggily, sleep still visible in your eyes and slowed movements.

**Eridan Ampora**: "I agree with you, w-we could lay here and just forget the world." You smiled sleepily wrapping your arm around his torso and slowly moving him closer to you. Life was great at the moment, it was wonderful spending time with Karkat.

**Karkat Vantas**: "If I lay here. If I just lay here. Would you lie with me and just forget the world!" You sang loudly and completely out of key as you struggled to keep back your laughter. "If you thought I didn't get that reference you were Wr-Ong!" You chuckled, poking him in the stomach with your finger.

**Eridan Ampora**: "Damn, I thought I was bein' original here." You giggled at his singing abilities. "Jesus shit, that was BEAUTIFUL, I'd got to admit." Sarcasm filling his tone of voice.

**Karkat Vantas**: "Wow, thank." You mumbled. "I take extreme pride in my singing voice, and I wish to further extend my abilities into the farthest rung of activity that is known as professionalism."

**Eridan Ampora**: "Oh wow, I too happen to 'extend my abilities into the farthest rung of activity known as professionalism.' You mimic Kar, but it was true, you were quite interested in fine arts and all that it offers to you, but you never really told anyone, they usually just thought you were joking and carried along.

**Karkat Vantas**: "You should show me someday. I can actually show you my real singing voice if I ever get around to it, because trust me. I don't sound like that." You laugh as you trace patterns on Eridan's chest. You loved tracing patterns on him, and he didn't seem to mind. "Damn we can just like, have an arts sharing day where we can just sing and draw and art." You chuckle, not knowing fully what you were saying because fatigue.

**Eridan Ampora**: "God, lets just go back to sleep..." You mumble already half asleep with a blabbering Karkat in his arms. Before he could hear his reply he was snoring away.

**Karkat Vantas**: You managed to successfully wake up before Eridan did, and this meant waking up, taking a shower, and then making a simple breakfast of pancakes, eggs and bacon for the two of you, which were some of the items that you did not leave in your vehicle when... Yeah. Speaking of that, your car now smelt like mint chocolate ice-cream and there was a dark stain in the back of your trunk where you couldn't manage to get the stain out, but whatever. It's just a car.

**Karkat Vantas**: You sung happily to yourself as you flipped pancakes and cooked the bacon. "Our names won't be remembered, if we die like trampled flowers. We refuse to be forgotten, written off as less than worthless." You sang fluidly and with as much passion as you could while keeping your eyes and mind focused on something else.

**Eridan Ampora**: It sounded like there was an angel singing in the kitchen. Isn't that a lovely way to wake up. You smile slightly, stretching out and yawning before heading to the kitchen. "Wow you really must be an angel sent down from heaven." You flirt

**Eridan Ampora**: You say in a flirty tone of voice.

**Karkat Vantas**: "Shit!" You nearly manage to fling yourself into Eridan as you jump back in surprise. "Fuck, way to give a man a heart-attack Eri." You huff, leaning forward once again to flip a pancake, a grimace across your lips. God you hope he didn't hear you.

**Eridan Ampora**: You chuckle groggily, rubbing your eyes to get the sleep out of them, "It smells good." You smile, leaning on the counter watching him cook. Shit, you were still wearing your clothes from days ago, how disgusting. You grimace at your attire and went to your own room to change. Clean clothes were always great. Now what should you wear? Oh christ, all of the endless possibilities. Hm, maybe a red shirt with a purple scarf? That colour scheme seemed to be a creative one. You stood there for a while deciding if you should wear a red shirt with a purple scarf, or a purple shirt and a red scarf. You just needed to look good for the day. Finally, you chose the red shirt, and strode back into the kitchen. Ah, fashion.

**Karkat Vantas**: "I should probably change too, but I'm too lazy to actually do it." you chuckled before smiling at Eridan. "Good morning! You cool in a singing voice as you flipped the finished pancakes onto two separate breakfast plates. Sighing in relief at your success in not burning the house down as you flipped off the oven.

**Eridan Ampora**: "You just wouldn't, clothing is an art, you need to perfect it in ev-very single day. It's... It's like an addiction, fashion-" You stopped right there before you could rant about "perfecting the art of fashion", you know how bored Karkat would be and you wouldn't want that. You raised an eyebrow down at the stove where their breakfast was, "Do you usually cook your meals or do you have micro-wave meals everyday?" If he did, he was a natural rookie at cooking.

**Karkat Vantas**: "I usually microwave things, or eat sandwiches. I only really cook when I have people over; I'm not too glorious at it. And if you care so much, why don't you go pick out my outfit for me?" You chuckle lightly as you nudge his plate towards him.

**Eridan Ampora**: "Ah, I see..." You grab the plate and sat at the table, "If you really are THAT lazy, I'll pick out an outfit for you. Because no way in hell you are goin' out like that!" You complained, taking a bite out of your breakfast. You haven't had real food in days.

**Karkat Vantas**: "I am that lazy, to be honest. And I think what I'm wearing is fucking fabulous." You shrug and take the spot at the table beside Eridan, smiling lightly and admiring your work of art before digging into it. "FUCK, what day is it today?"

**Eridan Ampora**: "Wednesday, I believe?" You cock your head to the side, "Yeah it's Wednesday..." You confirmed, taking a couple more bites of your breakfast. "And no way! you are not wearing that AGAIN. I w-will not allow it!" You complain yet again looking at Karkat's dirty looking turtle neck and very old sweat pants. You wrinkle your nose in protest of his clothing choices.

**Karkat Vantas**: "Fuuuuuck." you groan. This meant that you had to rush to finish your breakfast and head out almost immediately. "Well, I'm not going to end up eating most of this because I have to take a shower and get ready, because shower and shaving and shit. Kan is expecting us soon." you tap your foot nervously as you bite into another piece of bacon. Well today was going to be great.

**Eridan Ampora**: "Oh, right." You sigh, combing through your hair shakily, you almost forgot about that. You were worried for Karkat. You finish your breakfast quickly, "I'll go get your clothes ready when you shower ok?" you say reassuringly.

**Karkat Vantas**: "Thank you." you state, finishing up half of the plate before you dumped the rest in the trash, unable to eat more without nausea overcoming me. "Ah, okay I'm off to shower, and who knows, I might just let you fuck around with my hair for a while before we go." you shrug before turning on your heel and heading for the bathroom.

**Eridan Ampora**: "Ah yes!" You practically squirm in your seat, hopping out of it rushing to Kar's room to pick out his outfit for the day. With no avail, there was nothing to your taste, but you picked out a decent pair of jeans and a plain white shirt matched with a semi-worn out red and grey jacket. He should wear this sweater more often. You nod your head satisfied.

**Karkat Vantas**: After you finished up in the shower, you stood in front of the mirror, shaking your hair around lightly before deciding you were going to allow Eridan to do your hair. Why the hell not? "Eridaaaaan!" You call wrapping your towel tightly around your hips so it wouldn't fall off if Eridan came to do your hair. "Please bring me my clothes!?" You call in a whiny tone. Gah, you needed someway to not be nervous, so acting like a child was doing that.

**Eridan Ampora**: "I'm coming, I'm coming!" You say, rushing to the bathroom with his clothes gently folded in your arms. Using the back of your hand you knocked on the bathroom door, "Uh, you're decent right?" a blush rapidly lurking on your face. You had enough manners to knock before entering.

**Karkat Vantas**: "Do you honestly think I would call you if I wasn't. Just get in here." It was cute how that was what he was worried about. You swung the door open and leant against the doorframe, a smirk across your lips. "Soooo, what do you have picked out for me?"

**Eridan Ampora**: Shit, he was hot, "I tried to find some of your decent clothing in there, and let me tell you that w-was hard to do..." Choking the words out, you couldn't stop staring. He was only in a fucking towel! Your face turned into a tomato handing him his clothes that you picked out.

**Karkat Vantas**: You smiled as Eridan's eyes trailed your exposed skin with widened eyes. With a smirked, you stepped forward and gingerly took the clothing from his hands. Before you leant down and pressed your lips at the soft skin of his neck. "Thank you. I'm sure they'll look great." Your smirk stays pressed against your lips as you make your way behind your changing screen to put on the clothes that Eridan handed you.

**Eridan Ampora**: "Uh, yeah." Was all you could say, your eyes widening, when he disappeared behind the changing screen. Holy fuck. You couldn't deal with Karkat being in just a towel. You were a flirt yourself, but Karkat was on a whole other level.

**Karkat Vantas**: Teasing Eridan was going to become one of your favorite things to do, just seeing him flustered and blushing was enough to brighten up your day, and lately, you really needed some pick-me-ups."Eridan you're in control of finding me clothes now, I didn't even know I had these, and it looks great."

**Eridan Ampora**: "Show-ws w-what you can accomplish w-when you aren't a lazy ass." You roll your eyes, "And anyw-way, thanks I tried really hard to find to find SOMETHING decent in your drawers. No w-wonder your so lazy pickin' out clothes for yourself."

**Karkat Vantas**: You smile lightly as you step out from behind the screen. "Okay, so does it look decent?" You do a small little twirl, doing a little bow before blowing a kiss in his direction. "How about we go out shopping some day and you can help me pick out my clothes. I know you've always wanted to give me a makeover.

**Eridan Ampora**: "Obv-viously, I picked it out after all." You said in a sassy tone of voice, "Now lets fix that hair of yours..." You barely finish your sentence before you start circling him, ruffling his hair a little bit. Hm, maybe a nice hair swept style? You face him towards the mirror, playing with his hair, concentrating on how to style it. Finally, you decide on a style; you used Kar's brush, that looks like its barely been used, and combed it the way you wanted it too. "Ta-da!" You got to admit, he looked really cute with his ha- "Oh my god! Your freckles Kar!" You grab both of his cheeks in your hands and squished his face, "You look absolutely adorable, don't hide them!" You practically squealed, ok so it was a full on squeal. God, you couldn't help yourself he was just so god damn cute.

**Karkat Vantas**: "Eri!" You mumbled, your face heating as you swatted his hands away. "No they aren't cute, they're fucking horrible, yours are adorable." You stated, your voice low as you spun around Eridan, reaching into your drawer to grab your foundation and brush. "Hey wait." You mumbled, a mischifious smirk across your lips. "If you don't cover yours today, I won't cover mine!"

**Eridan Ampora**: "F-fine..." You pouted putting the foundation back. You were really self conscience about the speckles on your face, they were horrible. But, Kar's were fucking adorable. "But your freckles are cuter than mine any day!" You close the drawer with your hip, and faced Karkat smiling at him and his cutesy little freckles splattered across his face.

**Karkat Vantas**: "I swear to god, they're fucking adorable." You chuckle, poking Eridan's cheeks as you pecked his nose. Inspecting his eyes closely. "Your eyes are also gorgeous. They're sorta like a ocean." You laugh and tilt his chin lightly to get a different angle on his absolutely stunning eyes. "Wow, I love them so much holy shit."

**Eridan Ampora**: A light blush spread across your face, keeping your eyes fixed on Karkat's awe-struck eyes, how did he even find you attractive? You were just a little shit "You should really try and see the beauty in yourself Kar, I'll have to admit very bluntly but, you're fuckin' hot." A smirk spreading across your face.

**Karkat Vantas**: "Oh well, I'd have to agree with you on that. I am fucking hot. But so are you." You chuckled and tangled your fingers in Eridan's hair, pulling him in for a kiss. "Wow, aren't you like the most beautiful thing ever."

**Eridan Ampora**: "Jesus shit..." You breathed, how could he be this smooth. "W-what time are w-we supposed to be at the family get together anyw-ways?" You asked, changing the subject before you turned into a hot mess.

**Karkat Vantas**: "Fuck." You mumbled. "I'm pretty sure we have less that forty minutes to be there, but I guess that's enough time. We don't need hours." You shrug, scratching your head lightly. "But I think Kankri would appreciate it if we showed up, so I could introduce you. He has a habit of wanting to meet people before my sisters. I guess it's sort of like a train that continued since we were kids."

**Eridan Ampora**: Oh no, you'll probably be crushed with the attention of his family, especially Kankri. Oh well, you did after all like the spot-light on you. "So we better be headin' over there soon, don't want to be fashionably late, thats what all of the hipsters do now-a-days." You smirk up at him, knowing how cheesy that was.

**Karkat Vantas**: "You're a little shit." You laugh, shaking your head with a smirk. You gave yourself a once over in the mirror, under the watchful eyes of Eridan as you straightened your shirt and slightly adjusted your hair much to Eridan's dislike. Fuck, you were really nervous. You always had to alter your appearance when your father was in your presence because he told you he didn't like something about your looks and you listened to him an fixed it, opposed to making a big deal about it and ending up with a potential black eye. You refused to let that terrified side of you show through, as you slung your shoulder-bag over your shoulder and headed out your front door, Eridan following closely behind you.

**Eridan Ampora**: "Ok no, you were the little shit. Prancin' around in your towel, flirtin' like that, fuckin'-" You stopped talking and blushed fiercely, remember how built he was and just wanting to stroke his abs. No, that was just weird. You followed him silently, picturing his perfect torso in your mind.


	9. The Cave

**Karkat Vantas**: You were borderline shaking when you finally pulled up into Kankri's driveway. Your Dad's car thankfully not there yet. "Holy shit." You mumble to yourself, running a finger through your thick locks; probably ruining the hairstyle that Eridan set up for you. "So, I'm actually doing this."

**Eridan Ampora**: "We're doin' it together." You say reassuringly taking your hand in his and squeezing it a little bit, "Don't w-worry, Kar." You smile at his beautifully freckled face, taking in every detail of his profile. Karkat's nervous icy grey eyes, to his shaking hands, "It'll be alright."

**Karkat Vantas**: You sigh, tangling your fingers through Eridan's. "I hope you're right. I really hope you're right." You mumble to yourself before letting go and stepping out of the car, shutting the door carefully as you began to walk towards Kankri's front door, Eridan right by your side.

**Karkat Vantas**: You raise a fist to knock on Kankri's front door. Knowing full well that you couldn't knock loud enough to so 'trigger' him. So you lowered your fist and reached for the doorbell, your hand mindlessly finding Eridan's as you stood in wait. When the door swung open your eyes widened for a second before you regained your composure. "Karkat!" Kankri said happily, stepping towards the two of you with arms crossed over his chest. "Hey! So, Kankri. This is Eridan, my... boyfriend." You smile, flushing lightly as your gaze dropped to the white painted wooden planks of his porch. "Oh, so that's why you wished for his presence so badly. I understand now. Even though I was slightly confused about the whole family thing your brought upon me." Kankri straightened the bottom of his red sweater. "Anyways, Eridan. Nice to meet you. I'm Kankri Vantas. The eldest sibling."

**Eridan Ampora:** You chuckle awkwardly and averted his gaze from his and looking at Kan's sweater, dear god. It was horrible, it didn't fit him properly at all. Did all of the Vantas' have awful fashion taste or what? As Kankri led you two inside, you gaped at his house, it was very neat with lots of fancy decorations. Well, he wasn't surprised, because of how Kar explained him to you. You stood there awkwardly, not sure what to do next, better make up a conversation, "You have a very nice place, Kan."

**Karkat Vantas**: Kankri kept a calm composure as he closed the door behind us. "And thank you. Karkat here was actually the one who helped me paint the place and find suitable furnishings whilst he lived here." You roll your eyes lightly. "No, you forced me to follow you around and give my opinion. That of which wasn't even much of an opinion." Kan took great pride in his house, and always tried to give you unnecessary credit.

**Eridan Ampora**: "Oh, I see." You vaguely said, a lost look in your eyes as you surveyed the place. Nodding your head when ever Kankri talked, not wanting to seem rude. But wow, Kan could hold a one-sided conversation really well. No wonder Kar seemed so annoyed at times; He wouldn't shut up.

**Karkat Vantas**: "Karkat, feel free to show Eridan around. I know he must be feeling uncomfortable and you should at least attempt to make him feel more at home, after all. That is your job as his boyfriend." You roll your eyes and cross your arms over your chest. "Seriously, It's not just my responsibility. This is your house after all. And you should be helping because you are the host of this 'shindig.'

**Karkat Vantas**: With one last roll of your eyes you grab a hold of Eridan's hand, practically dragging him up the stairs and away from Eridan. Planning on showing him your previous bedroom before you toured the house.

**Eridan Ampora**: When you guys were finally out of Kankri's earshot you let out an exasperated sigh, "Holy shit, is he usually like that?" You put your head in your hands, your eyes widen in surprise. "How are you guys even related? Like, I get it, but I don't?" You hesitantly said, really confused. Karkat was the exact opposite of Kankri.

**Karkat Vantas**: "Yes, he's always fucking like that and sometimes it really drives me insane, others I'm completely fine with it depending on my mood, or on my anxiety levels. And with my anxiety being through the roof today, it's not fucking helping." You collapse on your bed beside Eridan, your face buried in the old, musty pillow that you used to use. "But I mean, he's one of the most important people in my life, so I can't necessarily hate him for that." You shrug your shoulders and sit up, your back flattened against the wall. "Besides, last month he let me come here and stay for a week when I was falling into depression again, and trust me. Having somebody listen to you at the extent that Kankri does, is actually quite comforting. And it's really the only time I can get him to shut up."

**Eridan Ampora**: "Well, you're lucky to have a brother like that.." You say, snuggling into him for a moment.

**Karkat Vantas**: "I'm sure Cronus would do the same for you." you smile, wrapping your arm around his waist as you allowed your head to drop onto his shoulder. When a voice called your name in a high pitched voice you nearly squealed in excitement. Nepeta and Meulin were here. A grin spread across your face as you stood up, wrenching your door open. "Stay here for a minute." you practically squealed as you ducked out of your room. Nevermind, you actually did squeal. You made your way down the stairs, loud enough that you knew Kankri would be on your ass about it later. But you didn't care. When the figures of your twin sisters appear from around the corner, you practically throw your arms around the both of them. Ah, how you missed these girls.

**Eridan Ampora**: You chuckled softly, "Alright." The squealing of Karkat's voice over powered your answer. You stood up slowly from the bed and walked over to the door peering around the corner. You could see a mesh of three figures together. You couldn't help yourself from smiling like a huge dork. They were all just adorable.

**Karkat Vantas**: "Karkitty!" Nepeta and Meulin screamed in close unison as you hugged them tightly. Nepeta was basically clinging onto your arm for dear life as you laughed happily. "I told you guys not to call me that! But I'll let it slide for today." you smile before ruffling both of their hair, earning angry shouts and mocking hits. "I missed you guys so much." you mumble, pulling them against you once more. "Oh and girls." you chuckle, pointing up stairs to where you could see Eridan peeking around the corner. "I'd like you to meet my boyfriend, Eridan."

**Eridan Ampora**: You shake your head and smile even more, walking down the stairs to have a formal introduction, "Hi, there." What more did you expect, of course the both of them tackled you into a bear hug. It was a little bit of a surprise but it felt nice.

**Karkat Vantas**: You laugh lightly as both of your sisters pounce on Eridan. It wasn't that you didn't expect it from the two of them, but holy shit Eridan was really enjoying it, you could see from the lopsided grin on his face. It wasn't until you heard another knock at the door that your smile faded, and your body went hard and rigid. Kankri gave you a sympathetic look before he turned on his heel to go answer the door. "SHIT. I can't do this." you hiss to yourself as you push past the still embracing group of three and all but dash up to your room.

**Eridan Ampora**: You break free from the girls with an apologetic smile before rushing after Karkat, "K-kar! Wait." You catch up to him in his room and hold on to his wrist before he could go any farther than a few steps in, "Stop, I know you're stronger than this." You lower your voice, "You better toughen up, because I need a man, and my heart is set on you." You whisper in his ear, in a sing-song-tone of voice. Well, you and your brother did have a lot of common after all.

**Karkat Vantas**: "Are you seriously quoting Grease right now?" you murmur, stepping closer and dropping your head on his shoulder, burying your face into the crook of his neck. "I'm not stronger than this, and it's very unlikely that I'm going to be able to walk back those stairs and face my Dad... I'm scared Eridan." you words were shaky and you felt as if you wanted to just run away from the bullshit of this reunion, but you were staying for Kankri, Meulin, Nepeta and...Eridan's sake.

**Eridan Ampora**: "It's okay, I'll be there for you, filing you up with as much hope as I can. Honestly, I want to see you be brave." You hug him for a moment, "Now, lets go down there and face whatever there is." You take his hand and tugged at it lightly, wanting him to follow you.

**Karkat Vantas**: You swallowed audibly, your shaking fingers twisting through Eridan's. You were scared worse than you had been before. It had been a year since you had seen him last

**Karkat Vantas**: And that fact alone was enough to scare the shit out of you. Kankri had told you that he had gone to get help for his alcoholism so maybe he was cleared from the abusive state that he so often held when he was intoxicated, but you really didn't know. Your hand tightened around Eridan's as you made your way down the stairs, feeling as if you were being swallowed by the silence of the room when you reached the foot of the stairs. And with one last gulp, you leant against Eridan your body shaking as you lifted your head to smile politely at your Dad. "Hi... Um... ." you bowed your head lightly. "That's Dad to you, kid." the eerily cheery voice chuckled causing your mouth to drop into an intense 'o' shape. Only days ago had this same man called you up, called you a freak and all but accepted the fact that you could have killed yourself. So what had happened?

**Eridan Ampora**: What? That was the only word that came across your mind. A few days ago Kar described his father as verbally abusive. What? You squeezed his hand comforting him as much as you can. You couldn't imagine what was going through Karkats mind at the moment. The room was too silent for your comfort and you squirmed a little bit, not liking it at all. It was weird for you not being able to stand the intensity that swelled around the quiet room. Mr. Vantas is what was making you uncomfortable, even though he seemed like a good person, he reminded you of your own dad.

**Karkat Vantas**: Holy fucking shit. You didn't know what to do or say, so you just stood there, shuffling awkwardly from foot to foot under the stared of your siblings and possibly Eridan. "Aha, sorry.. Dad." you laughed awkwardly, the shaking of your body not fading as you leaned closer to Eridan. "It's alright son, how have you been?" Holy fuck. "Okay, what kind of game are you fucking playing here?" you questions, placing a hand on your hip. "Karkat, do you really find it nessesary to use such vulgar language?" Kankri questioned from where he stood against the wall. "Kankri, I love you. And I respect your opinion. But please, let me work this out so this reunion doesn't drop down the drain." You don't let go of Eridan's hand as you step towards your father. "Care to tell me what the fuck is going on?"

**Eridan Ampora**: Now your mouth was gaped open as you watched with furrowed brows. You didn't have the slightest clue what was going on but you kept your mouth shut, terrified already, but you kept your composure and took a deep breath, stepping up besides Karkat since he wasn't going to let go of his grip anytime soon; unless something happened for the worse.

**Karkat Vantas**: Dad just stood there, his smile hanging loosely against his lips as you stood there, eyes boring into his with an extreme anger, and maybe even a little sadness. You didn't understand how he could go from forcing you to call him and calling you a freak to acting like one of the nicest fathers on the face of the planet. You weren't used to this sort of treatment from him, so to say the least you were aggravated, and at the same time terrified. "What do you mean, Kar?" You let a barely audible snarl escape your lips as your lips pulled back in a mocking smile. "Are you serious? You don't remember that phone call from a few days ago that sent me into relapse? You don't remember what you said to me? Are you honestly that pathetic? And do not ever, call me Kar." You gave it your all to not end up digging your nails into Eridan's hand, so you resorted into digging crescent shapes into your other hand. Your bandaged hand. His lips pulled down at the corners and into a frown. "I'm so sorry Kark-" "No." You stated, cutting him off. "If you think sorry is going to cut it, you are wrong. You hurt me. Badly and you want to smooth it over with a 'sorry'? That's completely nonsensical. I will never forgive you for what you've done to me. Ever. I don't care if you want to try to smooth things over, it's not happening unless I want it to, and right now. That is the last of my worries." His blue eyes almost identical to yours dropped down to the floor below him as he frowned, his eyebrows furrowing. That's when Meulin stepped forward, clearing her throat awkwardly. "Karkat, can I talk to you and Eridan in private for a second? Please?" You nod your head and grap Eridan's hand tighter, following after the long haired girl that led the path. When you reached the Living-room, all of you paused and Meulin stood there shuffling her feet as she stared at the ground. "Kar, Dad has been diagnosed with Alzheimers. And as far as we know, he doesn't remember calling you any of those things, and he called me up this morning asking if he knew where Mum was." You couldn't even speak as your free hand flew to your mouth. He didn't even remember what happened to Mom.

**Eridan Ampora**: You were speechless as you gripped onto Kar's hand. It was remarkable that both of your hands weren't broken yet, "Oh my god." You whispered, it was the only thing that you were capable of saying and you felt awful about it.

**Karkat Vantas**: You squeezed you eyes shut as Meulin opened her arms for you, and even though you didn't wish to. You let go of Eridan's hand and made your way into his arms. "So he doesn't remember ever hurting you, or any of us? Nothing at all?" You questioned, your voice breaking as you buried your face into his shoulder. "I don't think so. I feel so bad for not telling you sooner, but I don't think anybody wanted to hurt you after what has been going on lately." You had a faceful of ginger hair as she stroked your back soothingly, and this was really all you needed right now. Some reassurance that everything was going to be alright. "So, from now on I guess I'm going to have to push things behind me and pretend that they never happened, because he's never going to remember what happened?" You shake lightly as you press your fingers against her back, looking for something to distract you. "I'm so sorry, but that's how things are going. I'm not saying you have to, I mean, you always can talk to him about it. But he will be very confused." You shook your head and stepped back, wiping your tear filled eyes on the back of your hand. "No, I think I can do this." You smile, possibly the fakest smile you can muster before returning to Eridan's side, and dragging him back with you out into the main room. "I'm sorry about that, Dad. Something came up. I don't know what possessed me to say those things to you, and I'm genuinely sorry." You chuckle, practically skipping over to him and wrapping your arms around his waist, it some supernatural bout of courage. "I missed you, Kar."

**Eridan Ampora**: Everything seemed to go by so quickly as Karkat's hatred to his dad turned to love. God, he was a really good actor, but maybe that was the love he kept inside him for a really long time. You gape in awe as you witnessed the confusing sight before you. This is what his relationship with his father should've been like. Not being verbally abused by him, this was the real that his kids loved and adored. You just wished it wasn't because of the Alzheimer's. You wished this is how it originally was, so they could all be happier. Nobody needs that in their lives. You stood there behind them rocking back and forth, your mind spinning because of all of the things running through your thoughts.

**Karkat Vantas**: You remembered that look in your Dad's eyes. The same look he had whenever your Mom smiled at him, a look that had seemed long gone since her death. And he was looking at YOU with that look of pure happiness, and you finally remember what it felt like to have a Father who loved you. A father that was there for you, and listened to your problems whatever they would be, no matter how stressed out and tired he was; and he was here, in your arms once again. Even though you couldn't remove those memories of hurt and pain that he had inflicted on you, you couldn't be happier to have the father you once knew, back in your arms.

**Eridan Ampora**: Shit, what do you do now? The situation with Kar and his dad made you think about your own relation ship with your dad. Your shoulders slump as you thought about it for a bit. Wait, no how selfish of you; you straighten up yet again. This was all about Karkat, not you moping around.

**Karkat Vantas**: You step back and smile up at him, your eyes sparkling with tears of happiness that you refused to let fall. Holy shit, this day turned out better than you expected it to. When your Dad raised his hand to ruffled your hair, you flinched. A harsh flinch that should not of been there; but was. Before you swatted his hand away and chuckled nervously. "Dad, there's somebody that I need you to meet." You smile, hesitant if you should be telling your Dad about this just yet. You grin and step back a few steps, standing behind Eridan and wrapping your arms around his waist, resting your head on his shoulder. "This is Eridan, and he's my saving grace." You press a soft kiss you Eridan's shoulder as you stand there nervously, leaning partially on Eridan for support. Your Dad stepped forward, and you stepped back, breaking your hold on Eridan, as he slowly pulled Eridan into a hug. Shocking you into silence.

**Eridan Ampora**: "Hi-"you stopped talking because the surprise was overwhelming. Your eyes widen as you were hugged by Mr. Vantas. A wave of emotions hitting you harshly. You awkwardly wrapped your arms around him, patting his back, like you would normally do in these situations. "Mr. Vantas-" You were cut short of yourself not knowing what to say. Emotions were really fucking you over.

**Karkat Vantas**: "Dad!" You exclaim. "You could have warned him first!" You exclaimed lightly, laughing slightly as he returned a really fucking confused looking Eridan back into your arms. "I'm sorry, I'm just.. really proud of you Kar. You scored, he's gorgeous." He winked suggestively at you and you look repulsed before you dropped your head in embarrassment onto Eridan's shoulder. "Oh my god, Dad."

**Eridan Ampora**: Your face turned red as you put your head in you hand. Oh my god, was this actually happening? "I'm v-very flattered sir..." You say hesitantly, not sure what else you could've said, but you didn't want to be an awkward shit standing there like a dead thing.

**Karkat Vantas**: "Sir is too formal, call me Richard.. or if you prefer-" You spring forward and clamp your hand over your Dad's mouth. "Uh uh, no. No, no no. You are not starting this already this is the first time you've met him I swear to god." Your face was flaming as you kept your hand over his mouth, until you felt something warm and slimy slick across your hand, causing you to squeal and jump back, it was definitely not a manly squeal. "You just licked me!" You shouted, running your hand down his shirt sleeve to remove the spittle left behind.

**Eridan Ampora**: You bursted out laughing, clutching your sides. "Oh, my, god." Was all you could say in between your bursts of laughter. Holy shit, this was seriously a worse case of Alzheimer's. He even forgot how to act like an adult

**Karkat Vantas**: As you laughed you managed to make your way over to Eridan, resting your head on his shoulder once again as giggles echoed across the room, you even heard one or two escape from Kankri. "Good job Dad, you made Kankri laugh." You chuckle, smiling in Kankri's direction and only earning yourself furrowed eyebrows and a grimace. Oh, the family was back together, and if it didn't feel great, you didn't know what did.

**Eridan Ampora**: After you calmed down a little bit your phone went off, you sighed and grabbed it out of your back pocket. Tav was phoning you; you looked at Kar in confusion, "I got to take this call... uh be right back?" You walk a little bit a ways out of ear sot from the Vanats household and press the talk button, "Hello?" You answered, taking the phone in your ear. "Uh, Eridan? yeah hi, uh, we need you and Karkat to come down to the police station right away, it's Gamzee, he needs... help." He paused for a second, a muffled banging coming from the background, "Please hurry." Tavros disconnected the call before you could answer back. Your face gone pale, as you approached where Karkat was, "Karkat, it's an emergency, we need to go down to the police station right away." You grabbed his hand, "It's Gamzee, he needs help."

**Karkat Vantas**: You feel the color drain from your face. And you hear the gasps of Kankri and Muelin, Nepeta of which had shrunk into Kankri's side, in almost sheer terror. "No, Karkat you can't go, do you remember what happened last time!" Kankri exclaimed, taking you aback from the tone of voice he used. Kankri never raised his voice. "Well, would you rather him kill multiple people, or have me go down there and maybe suffer a few minor cuts and bruises?" Kankri's face paled and he backed off, wrapping his arms around Nepeta. "Kar, I just don't want to see you hurt again, we don't want to see you hurt again." Meulin stepped forward with a frown on her face, her red-painted lips in a pouting position. "I promise you all, that I'll be safe. I'll get in contact with Kurloz see if we can have him come down to the police station, because it seems as if I'm going to need a medical attendant on the scene just in-case." You frown as you turn around to face Eridan, pure fear in his bright blue eyes. "Eri, I want you to stay here. Please, please. I don't want you to be anywhere near him while I'm with him, because I don't want you hurt. Please, stay with them so they can keep you safe while I'm gone." You brush back Eridan's bangs as your frown increased. Just as things happened to get better.

**Eridan Ampora**: "No! I'm goin' w-with you Kar." Fear ignited in your eyes. You just wanted to protect Kar, you didn't want to see him get hurt again. You would feel hopeless if you weren't with him, too sick to the stomach to even think of the things that could be going on. "Please..." You whimper taking his hand and squeezing it, not wanting to let him go, and him to walk in a danger zone practically by himself.

**Karkat Vantas**: "No, I can't let you, Eridan. I'm not going to stand there and watch if I'm not able to control him myself. Gamzee is an extremely violent individual, and I still haven't shown you what he's done to Nepeta, Kankri and myself. I cannot submit you to that sort of thing, because I don't want you to be scared, or more importantly, don't want you to be hurt." You curl your fingers around Eridan's, staring into his eyes with a burning sadness. You didn't want to leave him here, but you couldn't have him anywhere near Gamzee, you were even frightened having Tav there, because despite their relationship, Gamzee loses himself when he falls into a trance, and so far, you've been the only one capable of retrieving him. "You're too important to me, and I wouldn't be able to live with myself if he even rested a hand on you." You mumble, leaning your forehead against his. "Please."

**Eridan Ampora**: "How do you think I feel when you get hurt?" You pause for a second gulping nervously, "Hopeless, I can't do anything to help and it makes me feel like shit." You shut your eyes tightly leaning in to Karkat more, embracing him, "Just don't do something stupid, like, something REALLY stupid. I just can't get past that stubborn skull of yours, can I?" Letting out a sad sigh you let go of Karkat, "Now go before I change my mind, and start follow-win' you."

**Karkat Vantas**: "I'm sorry." You whisper, placing a soft kiss to his forehead before finding your jacket and throwing it over your shoulders. "I'll be back. I promise, I will be back." You don't wave before you duck out the front door, your body shaking in fear and sadness of having to leave everybody like that. You throw the door open to your car, all but slamming it behind you as you catapult into the front seat, neglecting to buckle your seatbelt as you stomped the car into reverse. You had a best-friend to calm down, and promises to keep.

**Eridan Ampora**: As Karkat left, you broke down. Hearing the car leave, you broke down even more. The tears heavily flowing down your cheeks. "I-I'm so sorry, you shouldn't be seein' me like this." You wipe your face with your sleeve, trying to get your composure back. God, please keep Karkat safe.

**Karkat Vantas**: Your hands begin a steady tapping on your thigh as you rush to the police station, trying to keep yourself as calm as you could. You needed to do this, for everybody's good. When you pulled up into the broken down parking lot, you hopped out of your vehicle station without hesitation, already able to hear the commotion from inside. "Fuck." You whisper to yourself as you see Tavros, his knees pulled up to his chest as he sat against the cold, hard brick wall. "Tav?" You questioned, kneeling beside him. "What happened?" You whisper, placing a hand on his kneecap. "Somebody.. somebody.. was shit-talking me and... Gamzee just lost it.. the person he attacked is in the hospital right now..." You didn't need to hear anymore as you rose to your feet. "Okay, Tav. I need you to do something for me. Can you call Kurloz and tell him to get his Doctoral ass down her because I really fucking need him here. And I also need you to... Text Eridan and tell him I'm okay.. and that I love him.."

**Eridan Ampora**: You clutched your phone in your hand, needing to hold onto something. The phone vibrations brought you back to your senses as you checked it. Tavros, texted you, weird. "Karkat wanted me to tell you that he was okay and that he loved you." Your eyes teared up again, no he wasn't okay, he was going to get hurt. You felt sick to your stomach as you hunched over glaring at the phone screen. Finally you locked it and put it back in your pocket.

**Karkat Vantas**: You emerged into the building, your hands clamped into fists at your sides as you rushed to where Tav had told you to go, straight to the holding cells, where they were expecting you. You were sure that your nails were digging crescents in your palms as you walked straight ahead, the maniacal screaming of Gamzee sending a chill down your spine, and sending terror through your veins. "Are you Karkat Vantas?" A burly man with barely any hair asked you as you approached the small desk, and all you could bring yourself to do was nod your head as you shook in fear. "Are you sure you're going to be able to do this, son?" You nod your head once again. "But I don't want any interference, only do I want interference if I ask for it, and that will only be given my Kurloz Makara, Gamzee's brother. "Please, tell me where he is." The shaking of your hand increases as you step after the officer, as you finally reach the source of the screaming, and he hesitantly unlocks the door, nodding for you to enter before closing the cell door and locking it behind you. Fuck, well weren't you trapped now. "Hey best motherfucking friend." Gamzee drones in his unusually scary tone. He raises to his feet, standing a few inches taller than you, but enough to scare the shit out of you. "I was just tryin' to-" you cut him off. "Shut your squawk gaper and stay put!" You shout, stepping so your back was against the metal poles. "Gamzee.. I need you to come back.. Tav needs you Gamzee.. and he's standing outside unable to stop crying. You want to be a good boyfriend and stop him, right?" You question, but that terrifying smile remains. "Gamzee.. I need you to come back to me.. and I need you to do it soon, or they're going to have you sedated, and ripped away from Tavros, do you really want that to happen?" Gamzee smiles up at you for a moment. The terrifying speech of the word 'Honk' was the last thing you heard before your consciousness was ripped away from you.

**Eridan Ampora**: You sat on the Vantas' couch, clutching your knees. It was kind of them to let you be by yourself for the moment being. You just needed to be alone and let the tears roll off your cheeks. It's been a while since Karkat left and the sickening feeling in your stomach got worse and worse. Karkat was probably hurt and there was nothing you could do about it. You decided to text Tavros, "Are you sure Kar is okay?" after a couple of minutes there was no answer. Shit.

**Karkat Vantas**: You stood in complete blackness. Unknown to why you were here, and curious to what had put you here. There were no colors in the world that you saw, all there was was darkness, quite like the night sky; minus the stars. Tears began to pour from your eyes, you knew they were there, but you could not feel them. You couldn't feel anything other than the thoughts running through your head. As pain overtook your senses, you let out a gasp, your body hurting from every which way from something unintelligible. And that was when you woke up. Wide eyes staring at the white light above you as you were frozen to the spot. The familiar voice of Dr. Makara was the only thing you could hear, and the only words to managed to piece together were; Eridan and panicking. Fuck.

**Eridan Ampora**: You were already by his bed side when he was awakening. Your hand in his, caressing your thumb over top of his. "Kar..." You say in a hushed voice, squeezing his hand a little bit; you couldn't even look at him, the nasty bruises on him making you want to revolt to crying again. You could've protected him, even if you actually couldn't, there would've been more closure for you. Who knew what happened in there with him and Gamzee.

**Karkat Vantas**: You coughed and curled to your side, towards where you felt Eridan's warmth radiating against you. You hurt, you hurt a shit ton more than the last time that this happened. You could practically feel every single bruise that laced the skin of your body. "Eri.." You whispered, grasping tightly onto his hand as a jolt of pain went through your rips, causing you to gasp and clench your eyes close, tears welling instantaneously. "I came back." You whispered, panting lightly from the pain. "I- I love you." you whispered, in the direction that you could only guess that Eridan was, you couldn't tell. You couldn't see.

**Eridan Ampora**: "I love you, too." You whispered, almost on the verge of tears. The pain that he was enduring practically surged through you, you could feel his pain by just looking at him. Your eyes faltered and you planted them to your lap, you couldn't look at him anymore, it gave you too much grieve and pain. Just so much pain.

**Karkat Vantas**: "I'm so fucking sorry, I managed to get out and hurt myself. I should have listened to you. I should have had Kurloz come to knock Gamzee out before I even bothered trying to control his anger." You fisted your hand in your hair, body shaking in pain as you clutched Eridan's hand tighter with each pull of pain. "Can you.. please come lie with me, for a little bit?" You question, your hand smoothing over the back of his palm. "I need to deal with everything I've just fucked up and I can't do that without you close."

**Eridan Ampora**: "Of course, love." Adding your little nickname that you gave him. You gently laid down with him, making sure not to hurt him in the process. Your arm automatically went around him cautiously as you nudged closer to him.

**Karkat Vantas**: "Don't worry about hurting me, you're allowed to touch me." You mumble, nestling closely against Eridan's chest, despite the pain of moving around that it left you with. You wrapped a singular arm around his waist as you shook lightly, fighting back tears as you spun the thought of failing Gamzee, Tavros and most of all Eridan. Your hand tangled in the back of Eridan's shirt as silent unstoppable tears slipped down your cheeks.

**Eridan Ampora**: "I just lov-ve you, so much." You murmured. It's been a long day and you just wanted to break down, but you had to stay strong for him. You comforted Kar by stroking his very soft and fluffy hair that you adored so much. Karkat needed to let all of his tears out, what's the point of imprisoning them in. "It's okay Kar; I'm so proud of you."

**Karkat Vantas**: You press your throbbing forehead against Eridan's chest, clutching his shirt between your fingers. "Don't be proud of me, I haven't done anything to deserve it." you bite your lip softly and focused on the motion of Eridan's fingers through your hair.

**Eridan Ampora**: "Don't say that, I'm beyond proud of you, you may not believe it but your as brave as can be. A knight in shiny armor. Nobody else would've had the guts to face Gam like you did. Even if you knew how to, it's still a very scary thing to do." You nuzzled closer to him feeling his shaking frame on yours.

**Karkat Vantas**: "Kurloz would have had the guts, and he would have done ten times better than I did, and not ended up getting himself beaten half to death. I fucked up, fucked up worse than I did last time. And I'm so fucking sorry for worrying you, it was wrong of me and I shouldn't have done it. But now because of me, Gamzee's gonna end up in some insane asylum and I won't even have much of a word; because I couldn't stop him like I was able to last time." you took a deep breath, the scent of his cologne calming you down slightly as the tears continued to fall.

**Eridan Ampora**: "You did it anyways, and I'm proud of you, and you should be too." You planted a kiss on the top of his head, sighing sadly. "Just please know how much of a hero you are to others around you. I'm begging you to know that, you are strong, brave and the best thing that ever happened to me. Cheer up, I know it's hard, and sometimes people don't understand you. But, I understand, Kar, and I know that you are the bravest person that I know, I wouldn't of even have done half the things you are doing today." Wow, you were rambling a lot. You shut your mouth before you gave him a headache.

**Karkat Vantas**: You sigh and pull Eridan close, your arms draping over his neck as you rested your forehead against his. "You're my hero, Eridan. And I love you, so much. Thank you." you press a soft peck to Eridan's lips, smiling sheepishly as you pull away. "Wow, I feel like absolute shit." you groan, shaking your head and pressing your hand against your ribs. "Did I, by any chance. Break any ribs?" you questioned, wincing in pain as your hand touched tender skin.

**Eridan Ampora**: "Only one, it's not that bad of a break though, you're lucky Kurloz came in on time, the police couldn't hear anything-" You stopped talking, you bet Karkat didn't want to hear, and neither did you. You rest your forehead on his, nuzzling into him a bit more.

**Karkat Vantas**: "I know. He probably would have killed me. Much like last time. I was in this shithole for four weeks last time, and this feels ten time worse than last time." You groan uncomfortably and shift softly, keeping your body pressed against his. "They're waiting for you to leave aren't they?" You questioned, nodding towards the door with your chin.

**im sorry i know half of this was horrible incorrect on my part, because jesus shit am i ever bad at rping**


	10. Gospel

**Karkat Vantas**: Weeks later, and your broken bones had healed, sending you on a free ticket back home. You were left with only a few minor bruises and barely there cuts, and you were happy to be home. You were sure that you wouldn't have been able to survive that hospital visit if Eridan had not been there, since last time it was just you; nobody to talk to or things to screw around with. It was just you, and the lovely ceiling of the room. To be frank, you were still scared shitless of what happened. Neither the Sheriff or Kurloz were spilling anything about the occurrences, or what had been done to you, and it was nagging on you like a two year old child. Gamzee had gotten himself locked up in some mental institution out of state, one that you had been told to never visit without Kurloz by your side. And he never managed to calm himself down after his attack, leaving a depressed and helpless Tavros looking for ways to save his boyfriend online. It was heartbreaking to watch; you and Eridan agreed on such and you tried to have him over as much as possible so he could get his mind off things. And you were back to where your problems of late had started once again, over the stove making you and Eridan glasses of hot chocolate.

**Eridan Ampora**: It was a series of unfortunate events the past month, everything was flipped upside down for you, too many hospitable visits, too much internal pain. It was practically a normal thing for the two of you. Karkat's frame over the stove seemed more solemn than before, you just wanted to hug him and tell him how proud you were of him. But alas, you sighed and sat yourself on the counter beside him, "You know what would make the hot chocolate even better, if we added marshmallows!" You say with fake enthusiasm, and a fake smile to match.

**Karkat Vantas**: You nod your head, cracking a small smile. "Yeah, well. Why don't you go find them, genius." You chuckle, not as happy as you usually would have. Something gloomy had fallen upon the two of you lately, and you didn't know what or why. Smiles were rarely shared, and kisses and hugs less frequently expressed. Eridan had been sleeping in his room more often that before, and you cried yourself to sleep most nights, unable to reason why. Your smile slowly fell into a frown as you stirred the hot liquid with lack of enthusiasm. Holy shit, weren't you guys just falling apart.

**Eridan Ampora**: "Wow, sassy." You hop off the counter and went on the hunt for the marshmallows. When you retrieved them from the cupboard a whole bunch of thoughts swirled through your mind. What can I do to make this all better? Is this all my fault? Are we drifting apart? You sigh yet again returning with the loved marshmallows in hand.

**Karkat Vantas**: "I'm sorry I just-" you cut yourself off with a sharp shake of your head as you pull the pot off the burner, shutting the stove off with a flick of your wrist. You wanted to finish your sentence, but you couldn't. You weren't risking another emotional breakdown in front of Eridan. You couldn't do that to him, and you refused to. You reached over to grab two mugs, pouring an equal amount of the steaming liquid into both cups, leaving none left in the pot. You lean yourself against the counter, passing Eridan's mug to him as you sipped softly on your own. Blinking your eyed quickly as your gaze hit the ground.

**Eridan Ampora**: "I didn't mean it like that-" You couldn't finish the sentence. Your gaze went to the marshmallows as you put a couple in your mug and slide the bag of marshmallows to the side. Leaning on the counter you sipped on you hot chocolate feeling the marshmallows grazing against your lip, probably leaving a white mark, a... marshmallow-stache. You smirked at your own joke and looked at Karkat, "So... I know life's been a pain in the ass, but how have you been these past few days?" You ask, nothing else to really say.

**Karkat Vantas**: "I-." you feel yourself becoming choked up and hunch over your mug, swallowing tentatively, begging yourself not to cry. You couldn't do that, fuck you couldn't cry again. You spent three hours doing that last night.. "I-. Horrible." you finish, your eyes blinking closed as you felt the familiar burning sensation in the back of your eyes.

**Eridan Ampora**: You could see his struggle, "I-It's ok to cry you know. It's not bad to." You sipped your hot chocolate struggling with your own emotions at the moment. Weren't you two just a bundle of joy these days. Your eyes started to water up, but you blinked them back, knowing you had to be the strong one for once, not just the helpless little boy screaming for help in the past. You had to be a man who took charge, who could help instead of being the coward he truly was.

**Karkat Vantas**: You looked away, your fingers curled tightly against your mug, ignoring the light burn that stung your fingers. "I know. But I've spent enough time doing that in the past few days, I'm trying to restrain myself." you bit your lip, hard enough that you could taste the blood that flowed into your mouth. But you couldn't hold the tears back anymore, and you placed your cup on the counter and shrunk down to the floor, your hand covering your eyes as the tears slipped down.

**Eridan Ampora**: "Oh, Kar..." You sighed sympathetically, putting your mug down as well and slipping down beside him, wrapping your arm around him. Your instincts kicked in and you brought him closer to you, you were just so used to it. His warmth completing your emptiness. You needed him close to you.

**Karkat Vantas**: The sobs that escaped your lips were uncontrollable. This is what you needed, this closeness. His arms around your body, holding you close. You couldn't do this alone, but you could do this with him by your side. "What- what happened to us, Eri?" you rested your head against his shoulder, your body shaking dangerously. "We- You haven't slept in my room in weeks, and we haven't touched or-." you couldn't continue as another sob slipped through your lips.

**Eridan Ampora**: "I-I don't know either, I guess we needed a little break that we never knew we needed." You say with a tired tone of voice. You planted a small kiss to the top of his head, rubbing his shoulder hoping that that would comfort him.

**Karkat Vantas**: You lean into him, the comfort of his body making you melt into his side. "I haven't been able to go one night without crying, since we've been back." you sigh, your hand falling over your mouth. "I need you like a boy needs his mother's side, Eridan. And I haven't had you lately and I don't know what to do. What kind of break is necessary when it has been breaking us into pieces." your hand shakes lightly as you breath in his scent; and just bask in him for the time you have present.

**Eridan Ampora**: A singular tear fell down your cheek, you taught yourself to control your sobs, but not your tears. "I'm so sorry, I never knew-" You could relate with Karkat; you barely got any sleep, maybe an hours worth these past few weeks. Your cover up worked wonders for your eyes. You also took up cutting yourself again; you were going to quit but you needed it. But, you needed Karkat more.

**Karkat Vantas**: You leant back and pulled your arm free, sliding your fingers down the length of Eridan's arm, your suspicions confirmed when you felt the difference between skin and bandage, your eyes squeezing shut as your fingers intertwined with Eridan's. "I'm so sorry." you whispered "I should have noticed you were in worse shape than I was, and been there for you." you whispered the tears still falling as you reached to brush away Eridan's. You crawled over slightly so you were kneeling in front of him, as your hand stayed tightly clasped within his. Slowly you pulled Eridan's sleeves up, gasping as tears fell down twice as fast. Before you gave up and collapsed against him, your head falling against his neck as you sobbed.

**Eridan Ampora**: "No... I'm just a selfish and weak bastard. I'm the one who needs to apologize, for worrying you. I'm so sorry, Kar." You wrapped your exposed arms around him, feeling his shaking body against yours. "Beyond sorry, just fuck-" you cut yourself off feeling more tears pouring down your cheeks.

**Karkat Vantas**: "Don't you fucking dare." you whisper, your fingers tickling the skin at his neck, your tears staining his skin slightly. "You are anything but weak, Ampora. Remember a few weeks ago when I declared you my hero? Well that statement stays there, I don't see any acronym to selfish or weak anywhere in that mix." you pressed a soft kiss to his collarbone, your body still shaking. "I love you." you whisper, and God did it feel good to say that again.

**Eridan Ampora**: "I-I love you too." You said in a whisper, and holy shit, you meant it. "It's selfish because I'm hurting more than myself, and I'm deeply sorry," you moaned, gripping at Karkat's shirt with balled fists. The tears streaming down your face faster.

**Karkat Vantas**: You continued pressing soft kisses from his scarred neck to his collarbone. "Don't be sorry." you whisper, more of a breath moan than a whisper though. Your fingers reached up to tangle in Eridan's hair as you finally did what you needed most, pressed your lips against his and pulled him closer.

**Eridan Ampora**: Fuck, he was doing the cute thing, shit, shit, shit. You kiss him back hungrily. This is what you needed. It's what you needed for the past weeks, you really missed this. But the sensation felt different, more of a desire, a hunger. You didn't disagree with it.

**Karkat Vantas**: You let out a moan as you slide onto his lap, your fingers grasping the ends of his shirt as you pull it over his head, dropping it to the floor beside you as you pull of your own, attacking his lips with your on. God, it was almost as if he was the prey and you were the hunter.

**Eridan Ampora**: You had no specific clue what was going on; you hesitated a bit but kissed him back with the same passion. Your mind whirling around making you dizzy at his touch, you moaned into the kiss loving but liking the feeling it gave you. A horrible feeling you had in the past crept back into your memory.

**Karkat Vantas**: Your fingers tangled in his hair once again, trailing kisses once again and every once and a while allowing your tongue to graze against his skin. Holy fuck, this felt amazing. You had never been closer to somebody like this before, and holy fuck you understood why Dave was so obsessed with this sort of shit. You silently thanked Dave as you trailed your fingers down Eridan's stomach, reaching for his belt buckle.

**Eridan Ampora**: Your heart started racing, as you leant back against the kitchen cupboards trying to escape his grip. Now you were freaking out. The horrible memories came rushing back to you clear as day. You put your hand over top of his and moved it away harshly, your breathing heavy. You trusted Kar with every fibre of your body, but you couldn't do this. Awful scars were left from those days and you couldn't face those thoughts of doing it again.

**Karkat Vantas**: Your breathing was ragged and your eyes confused as you pulled away from Eridan's, you didn't make a move towards in fear that you had done something wrong. Had you hurt him? No, you couldn't have, you were being careful as possible. So why did he push you away. "Eridan?" you say his name with light confusion as you gently crawled forward, placing your fingers against his cheek and stroking softly, not knowing what to do other than that.

**Eridan Ampora**: You turn your head to avoid his lingering gaze. The tears started to pour down your cheeks, but this time you were sobbing, "I'm such an awful person, I'm so sorry..." You covered your face with your hands, you wanted to avoid the situation of going on that subject. You hated it. You never wanted to get out of Karkats embrace until now, but you did. "Just, get off of me before I puke all over you." That wasn't necessarily true, but you did feel sick.

**Karkat Vantas**: Your eyes widened as you slid off his lap, staring at your hands as if they had done something terribly wrong. You had never seen the same amount of terror in Eridan's eyes until now, you stood silent, barely moving as you fought off the urge to reach over and wipe his tears away, hold him close to comfort one. But you stood back, knowing that was what he wanted.

**Eridan Ampora**: You stood up un gracefully, stumbling to the bathroom. Balancing yourself by leaning against the walls for support guiding you to the bathroom. When you finally got there you collapsed your body weight on the counter. You turned on the tap letting the water run on your hands and splashing it on your face, anything to distract yourself from your shaking body. You finally broke down and started heavily sobbing. God, you were a huge mess.

**Karkat Vantas**: You stood there for a moment, unsure of what to do after Eridan had all but tripped into the bathroom. You pulled yourself up from the floor, wiping your hands on your wrinkled jeans. "Eridan?" you called weakly as you hastily walked down the hallway, following the sound of rushing water as you spun around the corner and into the bathroom, your eyes widened as you saw Eridan, the sight of his trembling body tearing your heart to pieces. You were careful not to overwhelm him with your presence as you traced your fingers over his back, those tracings finally resorting into spelling 'I love you.' into his back as he sobbed.

**Eridan Ampora**: You tensed up as you felt his fingers linger on your scarred back. "I'm so- I don't-" you try to fix up a sentence but your sobs made it difficult to do so. So, you just resided with crying like a coward. You leaned your elbows on the counter and put your head in you hands trying to stop the sobbing. "I just wished I could let you understand." Your words were muffled by your choking sobs, it would be a miracle if Karkat understand you.

**Karkat Vantas**: "I don't need to understand if you don't want me to." you whisper, continuing much to his distaste. "But I'm not leaving, I know you don't want me to touch you right now, but you need me." you stepped closer and allowed your fingers to trace down his cheek, just wanting to bring him as much comfort as you could, hoping to rid him of whatever pain he was in.

**Eridan Ampora**: "I love you so much, Kar." You mumble into your hands not bothering to look up at his beautiful face. Your sobbing slowed down to just the tears spilling out of your now bloodshot eyes. You took a deep breath in and out and you finally face him with a saddened look on your face; you buried yourself into his chest wrapping your arms around him shaking into his stable figure.

**Karkat Vantas**: "I love you too, Eri." you whisper, your arms falling loosely over his back. "I know you don't want to tell me, and I'm not going to force you to tell me. But if you don't want me to do something. I won't do it, just say the word and I'll never do it again." you smile slightly as you allow your head to fall onto his shoulder. "I want to make you as happy as I possibly can. So if you don't want something done. I won't do it. Ever. I promise.

**Eridan Ampora**: "Thank you, it's not that I don't want to tell you, it's just that it's difficult." You say in a confused tone. "I-I think we should go to sleep, my room?" Sleepiness crept up on you as you you pulled away from Kar and yawned.

**Karkat Vantas**: "Yeah, I get it. And yes, sleep would probably be a good thing right now." you yawn slightly, following in Eridan's footsteps to his bedroom, the both of you falling onto the bed, you instinctually curling up against Eridan, your head resting against his chest. "I love you." you mumble, fluttering your eyes closed as you felt your awareness fading into nothingness.

**Eridan Ampora**: It was nice falling asleep in his arms. You instantly fall asleep, it's been a while since you've felt this kind of bliss, sleeping and Karkat. As you drifted away, horrible dreams lurked your mind, but you couldn't escape this time, you fell into an abyss of horror and dread as your fathers face clouded your vision, his evil smirk engulfing you.

**Karkat Vantas**: You sleep unusually peacefully, your body relaxed and almost reluctant to wake up completely when you couldn't fall asleep immediately. You slowly came into consciousness, your eyes flickering open at the sliver that was not hitting Eridan; but hitting you and with a light groan, you rolled over. You escaped Eridan's grip and kicked your feet off the side of the bed, blinking at things in a drowsy blur. You raised a questioning eyebrow when you found a piece of paper on the floor, the pale purple of the room painted in messy streaks across and you slid your head down, your eyebrows furrowed as you untightened the fold and squinted your eyes to read the words scrawled across. '

**Karkat Vantas**: Goodbye Kar, thank you so much for everything. But it is time we part ways. I love you, and I'm proud of you." your body slumps and the note falls from your hands, flaking to the floor with a light rustle of paper as you drop your head into your hands, tears burning in the back of your eyes.

**Eridan Ampora**: You rustled a bit when you felt Karkats presence no longer there. You moan a bit and roll over not wanting to get up yet. Sleep was your best friend.

**Karkat Vantas**: You wipe your tears away furiously. You couldn't believe that you were only finding this now. You would have expected to find it on the night of the attempt, but not today

**Karkat Vantas**: You head to the bathroom, tears falling down your face faster than before as you turn on the sink, washing your face before sliding to the floor, your knees pulled up tightly to your chest. These few weeks had been hell for you, and it was just getting worse.

**Eridan Ampora**: You finally gave up and got up and stretched your sore body. It was a mystery how you were sore, probably because you were used to sleeping like that. You groaned and set your feet on the floor, heading out of your room. You heard Karkats cries coming from the bathroom, with a worried look, you enter the bathroom. "Kar?" You ask, going to his side and putting your arm around him; just like yesterday. "What happened?"

**Karkat Vantas**: "I-I found the n-note." you stutter your eyes staring blankly at your hand as your vision blurred and tears fell, staining your cheeks as they fell. "I'm so sorry that I wasn't there when you needed me." you whispered, leaning your head against your knees. Wow, reading that note hurt. It hurts a lot. You still didn't understand why the Aquarius was proud of you, but you decided best to not to argue against it as you bit the sleeve of your sweatshirt to conceal your sobs

**Eridan Ampora**: "W-what no-" you cut yourself off knowing, "Oh, right. Don't be sorry, it was my fault, I was just being selfish," The only word that you could describe yourself with was selfish, how could you feel good about hurting yourself when you are hurting a loved one as well. "I am sorry Kar, for getting you all worried about me." You nuzzled your head into his neck, "I am so sorry Kar."

**Karkat Vantas**: You frowned as you wrapped your arms around Eridan's neck, just so happy that he was still here. Still alive. Still yours. You didn't know what you would have done if he had been successful with his attempt, but you knew that neither of which would have been pretty. "You know, if you were gone, I'd probably end up following after you. Because I can't imagine life without you by my side, Eri." you whisper, your fingers stretched out across his exposed back as you attempted to fight back your tears. "Wanting to escape is not being selfish, nor is it putting the blame on yourself. It just proves how strong you really are to have the ability to keep on walking forward. You have two strong legs Eridan, you just have to get up and use them."

**Eridan Ampora**: "Well it's selfish when you're hurting others besides yourself." You say solemnly, biting your lip, trying not to burst out in tears. "And I'm not strong, I'm the exact opposite." A tear escaped your drowsy eye, you quickly wipe it away, sniffling. How could Karkat think you could ever be strong? It was a mystery, everything was a mystery.

**Karkat Vantas**: "No it's not. And you are the strongest man I know. You've dealt with things most people couldn't even fathom. And you've lived through them, and somehow you've managed to keep a smile on your face throughout the pain. And you've helped me overcome my own demons as you conquer your own. Even though they aren't completely gone, they're ceasing their attacks. And I'm here to help you ease that pain. Please, don't bring yourself down, you deserve better than that." here you go, Karkat Vantas pulling a Rose Lalonde.

**Eridan Ampora**: "No I don't..." You mumbled, resting your head on your knee, trying not to go into a state of gross sobbing. What Karkat said was beautifully said, but alas not true. You were weak as can be, you deserved nothing special, it's a surprise how Karkat even dealt with you half of the time.

**Karkat Vantas**: You smiled softly as you wiped your tears away, before rubbing soft patterns on Eridan's shoulder. "Yes, you do. And I'm doing my best to treat you how you deserve to be treated, nothing less than that. My goal is to make you happy, and I won't stop at anything until I achieve it." You stutter Eridan's face, and wipe away any remaining tears. "What happened a few weeks ago and what happened last night are not things I am going to hold against you. I would not do such a thing as that. I love you and I only wish for you to be happy, in my arms or not."

**Eridan Ampora**: "I love you too..." You say vaguely, even if Kar's words of encouragement made you want to say more than that, you couldn't make yourself say anything else. You needed a distraction from your own hell. Maybe a walk, "I-I think I need to take a walk, get some fresh air."

**Karkat Vantas**: "Do you.. Want me to come with you?" you question curiously, wiping your eyes once more before pulling yourself to your feet, brushing your ginger hair out of the way of your eyes before you gave yourself a once-over in the mirror. "C'mon." you mumble, holding your hand down for Eridan to grab hold of.

**Eridan Ampora**: You hoisted yourself up with Kar's help; your towering, lean, figure leaning against him for support. "Yeah." You say with no enthusiasm at all, smiling slightly at him. When you guys got ready, you let Karkat lead you out the door. You were a tired mess, your hair wasn't even brushed and you wore a horribly dirty shirt from a few days ago.

**Karkat Vantas**: You didn't hesitate in grabbing Eridan's hand with yours when you stepped out onto the sidewalk, your arms swinging lightly between the both of you. A content smile was washed across your face and your mind couldn't properly focus on anything other than the contact you were initiating with him. These were the moments you loved the most, silent as you just enjoyed the presence of each other.

**this was written at four in the morning so there are probably tons of mistakes**


	11. Last Chance

**Eridan Ampora**: You breathed in the fresh air around you and breathed out. It felt good going outside for once, it was getting to stuffy in the apartment. As you held hands with Karkat your mind wandered to the what ifs of life. What would cure all of those bad thoughts? What would make me forget all of the bad things? You thought of your dad for a moment and how his drinking addiction helped in cope with forgetting about his own sons. Even his own wife. What if, what if you started drinking? No, remember those times where your dad was so intoxicated that he almost killed all of you on several occasions? Right how could you forget. But maybe it was a worth a shot, it helped you forget and that's all you needed at the moment.

**Karkat Vantas**: Ah, this is what you needed. Walking around town, looking like shit but not giving a lesser shit about it. You subconsciously smoothed your finger over the back of Eridan's palm, a light smile gracing your lips as you glanced around and the hustle and bustle of the city. You missed times like this. Where you could just walk freely around town without a care in the world, nothing holding you back from doing anything. Just listening to the cars drive past, and the wind blowing your hair around, making you completely content for some reason unknown. This was one of those moments where you chose to forget everything that happened earlier in the day, and just thought about the present. "How are you feeling, Eri?" You question out of the blue, actually quite curious about your boyfriends well-being.

**Eridan Ampora**: "Better than usual." You say with a sigh. Nothing couldn't have been been better than this. Holding hands with your boyfriend, the outdoors, and the city sounds that surrounded you both. It was like an abyss to wonderland, but not. It was a mystery how you actually felt, content, normal, actually happy for once? God only knew. "Hey, could we stop by the store for a second?" You ask, "I, uh... need to get a few things for myself if you don't mind."

**Karkat Vantas**: "Sure, I don't mind." You shrug, smiling lightly as he pulled you after him down the street, you not bothering to question what he needed to get, or why he needed to get anything. "Do you want me to wait outside?" You question, reluctantly letting go of his hand.

**Eridan Ampora**: "Yeah, okay." You said with a distant look to your eyes. The types of vodka swimming through your head, wondering which ones to buy. You went to the entrance of the store till wondering which ones to get. These ones or those? The same simple question running through your mind. You randomly picked out some, giving up on which ones would be better. Alcohol in tow, you went to the cashier. Thank god you were of age now. The cashier covered them up welly and you headed out of the store in a mad dash to see Karkat. Hopefully he wouldn't notice.

**Karkat Vantas**: A frown pulled at the corner of your lips as Eridan disappeared into his mind. He obviously had something on his mind, and you decided it would be best if you didn't pry into it. He was stressed out enough as it was, so you didn't bother. You smiled happily when Eridan walked out of the store, a bag in his hand. You shoved your hands into your pocket and didn't reach out to grab his hand as you began walking beside him. Maybe he needed some space.

**Eridan Ampora**: "Was I too long?"You ask, a frown forming on your face. The bag started to get really heavy and you shifted them to one hand to the other trying to find a comfier way of holding it. To your horrible luck, there was no comfy way of holding them. With your struggle you hoped the bottles wouldn't clash together; that would be awful.

**Karkat Vantas**: "No, it's fine." You laugh lightly, albeit unenthusiastic. Your hands fucked around with the small fluff that had gathered in the bottom of your pockets. You watched Eridan out of the corner of your eye, watching as he struggled to carry whatever was in that bag of his. "You know, I could carry that for you if you'd like?" You question, cocking your head to the side lightly as you started back in the direction of your apartment.

**Eridan Ampora**: "Oh no I'm fine!" You said almost too quickly. When you guys finally got to the apartment. You hurriedly took off your shoes and headed to your room dumping the bottles in the closet and picking out one bottle from the packaging, shutting it closed. Too bad you didn't have a mini fridge in your room, that would've been easier. Karkat was going to be doing something else to occupy himself now, right? So don't feel bad, just drink the thing, forget about your problems and just shut down for a while; yeah that sounded good. You took a swig out of the bottle, drifting down onto your bed. when you finished the whole bottle, your mind wasn't at its right state, but you still grabbed another one, loving the buzz it gave you.

**Karkat Vantas**: You sat in the kitchen, your laptop sitting peacefully where it usually did on the kitchen table, but this time; you were in front of it. Kankri had suggested that you guys set up a Skype call, so that's exactly what you did. You were laughing as Nepeta hung off of Kankri's shoulders, obviously angering him to some extent as she squealed happily into the microphone, talking about her day the way that a five year old would, and you couldn't help but listen. It was really fucking adorable. "Meulin bought me a cat toy today, Karkitty!" Nepeta squealed, lowering herself off Kankri's shoulders and reaching into her shoulder-bag, pulling out a blue stuffed cat that accurately resembled her best friends favorite color. "I have one for me and one for Equius! I'm giving him the one with my favorite color!" You smile as you rest your head on your hand. "Yes, he's going to love it Nepeta." You smile, winking at Kankri through the webcam, earning an eye roll. The sound of Eridan exiting his room had your head shooting up. "Hey guys, it's alive. So I have to go see what he wants for dinner." You smirk, sending a light wave through the camera. "I'll be sure to call you guys tomorrow, and maybe Eridan will join the call." You shrug before blowing a kiss, laughing lightly as you got bombarded with shouts of 'goodbye' before you shut your laptop quietly. "Eridan?"

**Eridan Ampora**: Everything was a blur as you stumbled into the kitchen and to where Karkat was, "W-what's goin on?" You say with a slur, keeping your balance by holding your hand on the wall. "Kaaaar." you exaggerate his name. You finally made your way to where Karkat stood and you wrapped your arms around, leaning against him. It felt like you twirled in multiple circles and you were dealing with the aftermath as you staggered in his arms. "You smell good, like Karkat." You whispered into his ear and giggled. "What, what kind of perfume do you use, do you, do you use Karkaaaaat perfume?"

**Karkat Vantas**: "Holy shit, Eridan as you drunk?" You struggled to keep his weight held up as he all but crushed you. You wrapped your arms around his waist and dragged him back into his bedroom, all but pushing him down onto the bed pointing an accusing finger at him. "Eridan where did you even- Oh." That's why he wanted to go to the store. He had to get some alcohol. You dramatically face-palmed and stepped backwards, sliding along the wall and to the floor. Out of all things he could have done, why did it need to be alcohol.

**Eridan Ampora**: You roll off the bed and onto your back, you groaned at the impact. When you recovered you crawled over to where Karkat was. Putting Karkat's legs in between yours you took Kar's hand away from his face and crashing a hungry kiss onto his lips. You put a supporting hand on the wall beside Karkat's head. Almost like a prey to their predators, trapping him there.

**Karkat Vantas**: Your eyes widened and refuse to close, your body pinned up against the wall, restraining you from doing anything to fight back. You press your hands onto Eridan's chest and push back hard, but his body barely moves. His lips are crushing on yours and you're struggling to get free, needing to find a way to get him to go to sleep, or to call Kankri and have him come over and help you. "Eridan!" You manage to force out when Eridan pulled away for a second, your hands came up to his face and you attempted once again to get him away from you, failing miserably as his hands grabbed your wrists and pressed them up against the wall. After wriggling and struggling to get out for few moments, your claustrophobia driving you to the point of being scared for your life. You did the only thing that you could do, you brought your knee up between Eridan's legs. Hard.

**Eridan Ampora**: You let out a cry of pain but you didn't let go of your grip, you only moved away from him slightly. You didn't think, you just did what your instincts told you to do and smacked Karkat's head into the wall behind him harshly. Breathing heavily you broke your grip on him and quickly pinned him to the wall with your fore arm connected to his neck. You leaned in on his face, so he could breathe in your alcohol stench, "What do you think you're doing, I thought you wanted that, I know you fucking wanted that." You snarled at him. But in few seconds or so you were knocked out, sleeping.

**Karkat Vantas**: You're eyes stood wide, your mind disoriented as pain coarse through the back of your head. Holy fucking shit. You pushed Eridan's asleep body out of your way, scampering away like a hurt puppy dog as you pushed yourself out of his room, too dizzy to even attempt at standing up. You crawled your way into the bathroom, your hand clutching at the back of your head as you slammed the door shut behind you, twisting the lock and collapsing into hysterics. Eridan had done the thing he had promised he would never do. He had promised he would never hit you and here you were, blood trickling from the back of your head as you collapsed into hysterics. You don't know when you did, but soon after, you passed out in the bathtub, blood from the back of your head staining the soft white of the porcelain tub.

Eridan Ampora: As you woke up from the floor, it felt like your head was a fast heart beat. You groaned and got up from the floor staggering, you tipped forward and braced yourself on the wall, leaning your head on the cool wall. You stayed there for a good whole minute contemplating life. When you felt like you could actually walk you took a step away from the wall and still staggering, made your way out of your room and by the bathroom. You tried opening the door but it wouldn't budge. "Hey, Kar you in there?" You question drowsily still trying to open the door. With no answer you staggered through out the apartment trying to find him. To no avail there was no Karkat in sight. You started panicking; what happened last night? you found something that would work for pick-locking the door and you used it. As you burst through the door, you see him lying on the cold hard ground. With the blood trickling down his back. "Shit! Kar," you yelped, staggering onto the floor with him, "Kar? Wake up please." Oh my god, you idiot what did you do last night.

Karkat Vantas: Eridan's voice shocked you out of the amount of sleep you had managed to catch without nightmares raging through your mind. Your eyes widened and you backed yourself up against the wall, your breathing becoming ragged and terrified and as Eridan took a step closer you threw your arms behind your neck with a squeal. "Please- don't hurt me!" you bed, shrinking into the with terror dripping from your words. "Please..."

Eridan Ampora: "I wouldn't hurt you Kar..." You say softly taking a step back, knowing whatever you did last night he needed to be away from you. "I'm so, so, so sorry. Beyond sorry. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to do anything to harm you in anyway." You pleaded, hurt was laced in your words. How could you live with yourself now. You hung your head long apologizing one more time, knowing that he would never forgive you again, what a scumbag you were, you were an awful person and you didn't deserve to have happiness in your life, you don't deserve his forgiveness.

Karkat Vantas: Your head falls into your hands, your body shaking as you sobbed harshly. All you wanted was for Eridan to wrap his arms around around you and tell you that it was all a bad dream. But you knew it wasn't. And you could tell from the drops of dried blood that covered a vast majority of the floor. Your one wrong move had brought you what you had feared most, but what happened last night, didn't make you love him any less.

Eridan Ampora: Last night probably made him hate you. You closed your eyes as you heard Karkat's sobs filled the room, you were disgusted with yourself, you're just like your father. A single tear came down your cheek and fell on the ground dramatically. "It's all my fault..." You clench your fists at your sides, letting more tears fall.

Karkat Vantas: You couldn't bring yourself to respond to Eridan's words as you struggled to harness in your sobs. His anger with himself just made you want to stand up and tell him that everything was going to be okay, but you knew it wasn't. You knew you couldn't approach him, you couldn't hug him because of how scared you were. A timid "I love you." was the only thing you managed to say.

Eridan Ampora: "How could you? You don't deserve me, you deserve the best that you can get." You wanted to help him but you were scared to go near him, knowing he would freak out. "Just... can I please help you?" You asked worriedly, looking around him at all of the blood you managed to cause.

Karkat Vantas: "Y-yeah." you mutter, your voice faltering slightly as you unraveled your legs from your chest, scratching your forehead lightly as another bout of pain traveled through the back of your head. You let out a light curse and prodded it lightly, only earning yourself a wince and a semi-bloody hand. "And if you think I'm not going to love you because of something you did wrong.. you are wrong. I'm... I'm used to it."

Eridan Ampora: "You don't deserve it." You repeated. Retrieving the much needed supplies you bent down to where Karkat was washing the blood away with a cold damp towel. Hoping not to cause him too much pain. "I'm sorry..." was all you could say as you kept on dabbing the towel to the wound.

Karkat Vantas: You winced with every press of the towel to your head, your body still shaking lightly. "Don't be... I'm alright." you whispered, clenching your fists together when he accidentally pressed too hard. You found yourself still terrified, in disbelief of last night's occurrences. "Please.. Don't blame yourself.. It wasn't your fault." you whisper, leaning back slightly into his touch.

Eridan Ampora: "You are not okay, I know. It IS my fault, I was stupid enough to get the bloody hell alcohol and I'm sorry, you have no idea how much I love you, I don't know how to cope with knowing what I did to hurt you." You say in a whisper. You got up and got the bandage wrap and wrapped it around his head; the cut wasn't deep enough for stitches, which was a good thing. Securing the bandage you let out a sigh of relief.

Karkat Vantas: You stood silent your head dropping lightly after he secured the bandage. "All I tried to do was stop you from doing something you'd regret... And.." you covered your eyes with your hand, the shaking starting up again. "I was terrified, Eri. Because I knew sober you would never have done those things and I.. I didn't know what to do.. So I hit you to get you away from me and.." tears trickled their way down your cheeks as you shrunk into yourself. "I was so scared.."

Eridan Ampora: "Shit..." You dropped your gaze looking at the floor making sure you didn't look at Karkat, "I'm scared to ask, what I did and I don't want to know, I'm sorry for scaring you, god I'm such an asshole, just like my god damn dad." You mumbled the last part your words dripping with self hatred. Your like the heir to your fathers throne.

Karkat Vantas: "No, you are nothing like your Dad, Eridan. But you broke a promise that you swore you would keep and I don't know what to do." your tired eyes fluttered half shut and you blinked rapidly, wiping the tears away with the back of your hand. You slid around on your knees to face Eridan, a hesitant hand reaching forward to stroke his cheek. "But.. I still love you." you hesitated before you reached forward and wrapped your arms around his torso.

**Eridan Ampora**: You were surprised when you felt him hug you. You weakly wrapped your arms around him, tears pouring down your cheeks. "But how can you still love me when I did something unforgivable?" You squeezed your eyes closed, guilt surrounded you and it was suffocating.

**Karkat Vantas**: "I don't know.. But love doesn't fade that fast Eridan." you sigh, burying your face in his neck, enjoying his presence despite the fear you held. "And it was a mistake, I'm going to be just fine. I promise."

**Eridan Ampora**: "Love works in mysterious ways..." You spoke softly, sobbing quietly. You wanted to change the subject. "Maybe you should lay your weary head to rest, I don't want you to fear no more," You say, "On something comfier than the cold bathroom floor." you added smiling solemnly.

**Karkat Vantas**: "Come to think of it I think that would be fucking great, my back is sore and ugh." you groan, smiling lightly. "Carry me, my prince." you smiled happily, throwing your arms up like a young child begging to be picked up.

**Eridan Ampora**: You rolled your eyes jokingly, picking him up like a baby, "Of course, anything for my brave knight." You kissed him on the forehead and carried him out of the bathroom and to his room. Gently, you placed him on the bed, tucking him in. "Sweet dreams."

**Karkat Vantas**: "Who said I was going to actually sleep?" you question, halfheartedly tugging him onto the bed beside you, giggling lightly. "I don't think I'll actually be able to sleep for a while, but I can just.. Lay here." you smile, staring at the ceiling as you connected your hands.

**Eridan Ampora**: "Let me guess... 'and just forget the world'?" You laugh knowing the reference you used was horrible but worth it. It seemed as if Kar seemed happier, on the outside, but on the inside he was probably being torn to bits and bits. And you felt horrible, beyond horrible. You squeezed his hand chuckling a bit.

**Karkat Vantas**: "Yes, exactly." You smiled lightly as you scooted closer to Eridan. That fear you felt deep inside still remaining, and the pain in your heart throbbing fearfully. You needed Eridan, like a child needed his mother's side. But you also were terrified of what you would do if a re-occurrence of last night happened. You prayed to a god that you didn't believe in that there would be no next time, and that this mistake would heal over time, but you were unsure. There was always that what if question, that nagged at the back of your mind, sending you into a state of paranoia that couldn't be erased. So you decided to push all of those questions out of your mind as you stared at the ceiling, holding Eridan's hand with a face smile across your lips. You could do this. You could recover. Who were you kidding, no you couldn't.

**Eridan Ampora**: As you two silently laid there, Karkat drifted off in to a deep slumber. Quickly and quietly you slipped off of the bed, put your shoes on and headed out the door with your dirty clothes still on and your hair like a rats nest. As you made your way down town, walking fast, faces past and you were finally there. With your wallet in tow you entered the pub. It had a horrible stench of sweat, beer and cigarette smoke. You almost puked because of the awful stench that filled up all of your senses, but you got used to it pretty fast. Making your way through the crowd you stopped at the bar, sitting at a worn out stool. You ordered a simple beer, hoping that that would help you warm up. You felt so selfish doing this, but at least you were no where near Karkat so you wouldn't hurt him anymore. You just needed to forget about that and drink away all of your problems. Before you could open the can, a hand collided with the back of your head and pushed you down hard against the wooden top. A familiar voice bellowed behind you, "What the hell do ya think you're doin' here you fuckin' twat." His heavy accent flowing through his words, but everything was all a blur. Why was he here? Of course to your misfortune he had to be, and the night staff frankly didn't give a damn if you were going to be beaten to a pulp.

**Karkat Vantas**: You don't remember how you woke up, but you do know it was influenced by your hand accidentally hitting the back of your head in your sleep as you awoke with a pained yelp, your body flailing into sitting position as you clutched at the bandaged wound. You tried to fall back asleep, but the absence of Eridan at your side prevented it from happening. You swung your legs off the side of your bed, deciding to maybe eat some chocolate, make some cocoa and get started on another Skype call with Kankri and your sisters. You wobbled into the kitchen, pulling a pot from the cupboard and the milk from the fridge, beginning to make your hot chocolate as you leaned over, kick-starting your laptop as you pull a caramel chocolate bar from the top cupboard, ripping off the wrapper and taking a bite as you checked on the mixture, before sitting yourself in front of the computer. You were just about to open your Skype application when the slam of the front door opening convinced you otherwise.

**Eridan Ampora**: when you're dad was finished with you, your face bloody and bruised, your arms had a few burn marks from his cigarette lighter that he always carried around with him, your legs and torso matched each other with deep, long, jagged cuts. It's not like you already had scars from him. You felt like crying but you couldn't bring yourself to do it, you just groaned in pain. When you finally reached the front door you leaned against it pushing it open with all of your body weight and slammed it behind you shut, pissed off at yourself. How could you let that happen to yourself. Maybe it was Karma getting you back for Karkat, you deserved it. Being your dads punching bag might have been a good thing. You staggered into the bathroom and locked it behind you, ignoring Karkat's worried look on his face. You slid down the door. And that's when you broke down crying. The pain was too much. After your dad brought you out back of the pub, you really weren't the same anymore, you felt even more hopeless, worthless, weak.

**Karkat Vantas**: "Eridan?" You called softly, your voice weak and slightly terrified. You could hear the Skype call noise ringing in the bathroom but you refused to leave the door to answer it. Kankri was probably going to be pissed at you later, but you could tell that Eridan needed you by the way he limped in and hid his face from you. You could hear his sniffles and barely audible sobs from the opposite side of the door as your ear was pressed against the wall. And with every noise you could feel your heart dropping into your stomach. He needed you, but he wouldn't let you in. You could tell he was beyond mad at himself, so you debated leaving and answering the call, but your need to comfort him put it's foot down and refused to let you leave. "Eri, please. Let me in."

**Eridan Ampora**: You unlocked the door and moved away from it slightly, scooting over to the bathtub to lean on it. God, you were in so much pain, you could barely move because of the pain you were in. It was a miracle that you made it home alive. The blood was seeping through your shirt, at least it was black so it wasn't that noticeable. How could life be this cruel to a single person, right, because you were as guilty as can be, an asshole. You groaned in pain, wincing at the bruises that surrounded your face, making sure not to move as much. You were a bloody mess who didn't need any help. Just let him shrivel up and die here.

**Karkat Vantas**: "Oh my fucking god." You stepped through the door and rushed to Eridan's side, your hands flying softly to his face, lightly pressing on the bruises to test if they were real. Which was pretty fucking stupid because it was obvious that they were, and you immediately stopped as Eridan winced. You silently thanked the lord that over the years you had stacked up on bandages as you scampered over to the cupboard, grabbing a few rolls and tossing them beside Eridan. Going on a mad-fucking-rampage to get everything you needed to treat him, and quickly.

**Karkat Vantas**: You assess the damage done to him and decide to start where there would be less work involved, grabbing your bottle of aloe vera cream and applying it to the burned area, warning him about possible pain that could occur before you started, only earning a few winces and grunts of minor pain. You carefully wrapped gauze around the burns on both of his arms, kissing them lightly before you moved on to your next task, which would probably be the cuts on his face. You were happy that the cuts had stopped bleeding as you leant over his legs and worked on cleaning them out, this time earning more grunts of pain. You give him a once over to see if there was anything else to do and you nearly gasped as you saw the dark stain spreading on his shirt. Fuck this should have been the first thing you tended to. You pulled his shirt over his head, ignoring his words of protest as you immediately grabbed a clean towel from the hook, pressing it against his chest, ignoring his grunts of pain as you stood for as long as you felt necessary, and until you knew the blood had stopped before you once again grabbed the bottle of hydrogen peroxide, causing Eridan to bite his own hand and clamp his eyes shut as he braced himself, fully aware of how much it was going to fucking hurt. When you had finished cleaning you grabbed the gauze, wrapping it around his torso with close perception as you furrowed your eyebrows in concentration, tying up the gauze with a sigh of slight relief before you cleaned and bandaged the rest of the cuts. "Holy fuck are you going to tell me what happened or what?" You stated, in a slightly hysterical state of mind. That was very emotionally damaging on your part.

**Eridan Ampora**: You kept your eyes close and breathed raggedly, biting your the inside of your cheek so you wouldn't start crying. Before you talked you let out an exasperated sigh, "I saw... my dad." Your voice quivering. A single tear escaped your eye, "I was at the pub and he attacked me." The tears come streaming down your face, it felt like you lost something you can't replace. You felt numb from the pain, "This has been one of the worst attacks Kar, beside that other time... but that doesn't matter." You were shaking, you felt cold, miserable and you didn't know what to do.

**Karkat Vantas**: "Oh my god, Eridan." You whisper, leaning forward and pulling him against your chest. You found yourself unable to be mad at him for going to the pub. Unable to be mad at him in general because he was feeling so helpless. His father had fucking beaten him up. Again. And you couldn't have done anything to stop it. "I-I.. I can't believe it happened again.. I thought he would have stayed away from you.. or fuck." You buried your face softly into his neck, trying to bring him as much comfort as you possibly could. He really needed it right now. And so did you.

**Eridan Ampora**: "No, he was drunk as hell, and didn't know what he was doing. He probably just likes beating me up though... just for the fun of it." You mumble, "Don't worry, I'm used to it, it's not like it was a big surprise or anything, I'm just glad he didn't do what he normally does when he's in that state of mind, it would've been worse, and uh... shit yeah." You stopped talking, your own voice giving you a headache.

**Karkat Vantas**: "Hush, don't speak. Let's get you into bed or something. I'll make you some food and tea or something. You seem like you could really use it right now." You state, wrapping your arms around his waist and slowly helping him to his feet, allowing him to lean on you as you made his way back to his room. You helped him get into the bed and pulled the covers over him, feeling like a mother to a small child. "I'll go get some shit and I'll stay with you for a while. Warning though, I may have to bring my laptop because Kankri has been Skype calling me all morning and expects me to call him back." You smile, kissing him softly before you turned on your heel and headed for the door, figuring out what you wanted to make him.

**Eridan Ampora**: "Thanks Kar you're too kind, really." You said softly, a small smile spread across your face. How could you get through one night with out Karkat? It was a mystery, you just needed him in your life, he completed you, you two were the perfect two. Somehow Kar needed you as well, but all you do is cause nothing but agony, you pain him. You gazed up at the ceiling until you heard Kar come back in.

**Karkat Vantas**: You returned some time later, unable to successfully make him anything other than a few sandwiches and some apple tea. After you had helped him sit up you handed him his food and scurried off to grab your laptop, happily settling yourself onto the mattress beside Eridan. "Okay, so if any of them get too fucking annoying for you to listen to, tell me okay, and I'll grab headphones or something." You shrug, pressing the call button on Kankri's profile. "Karkat Vantas, it has come to my attention that you have been potentially ignoring the calls of me and your sisters included; all day. And I would like to know why that is." You rolled your eyes and smirked at him through the webcam. "Well, for starters I was busy, second I was busy and third I was making Eridan food and didn't want to end up killing myself by talking to you at the same time as doing such a dangerous act." You chuckle lightly as Kankri scowled at you. "Nepeta and Meulin are leaving today so they might head by your apartment around dinner, I hope you are alright with that." You nodded your head and glanced at Eridan in the corner of your eye. "I think I'll be alright with that." you shrug, tapping your finger lightly on the side of your laptop. "Oh, and give Eridan my well wishes, it seems I have to log off right now, somebody is attempting to get my attention via home phone." He stated, adjusting his camera. "Okay, bye Kankri!" You call, waving lightly with a smile on your face. "Goodbye, Karkat. Have a good night."

**_FRIENDS I AM REALLY SORRY FOR THE AMOUNT OF SONG REFERENCES BEING UseD, BUT ONCE WE STARTED WE COULD NOT STOP._**

**_WE HAVE BEEN INFECTED. _**

**_SEND HELP_**

**_Whispers it is a mystery_**


	12. You're Still Looking For

**Eridan Ampora**: "Thanks Kar you're too kind, really." You said softly, a small smile spread across your face. How could you get through one night without Karkat? It was a mystery, you just needed him in your life, he completed you, you two were the perfect two. Somehow Kar needed you as well, but all you do is cause nothing but agony, you pain him. You gazed up at the ceiling until you heard Kar come back in.

**Karkat Vantas**: You returned some time later, unable to successfully make him anything other than a few sandwiches and some apple tea. After you had helped him sit up you handed him his food and scurried off to grab your laptop, happily settling yourself onto the mattress beside Eridan. "Okay, so if any of them get too fucking annoying for you to listen to, tell me okay, and I'll grab headphones or something." You shrug, pressing the call button on Kankri's profile. "Karkat Vantas, it has come to my attention that you have been potentially ignoring the calls of me and your sisters included; all day. And I would like to know why that is." You rolled your eyes and smirked at him through the webcam. "Well, for starters I was busy, second I was busy and third I was making Eridan food and didn't want to end up killing myself by talking to you at the same time as doing such a dangerous act." You chuckle lightly as Kankri scowled at you. "Nepeta and Meulin are leaving today so they might head by your apartment around dinner, I hope you are alright with that." You nodded your head and glanced at Eridan in the corner of your eye. "I think I'll be alright with that." you shrug, tapping your finger lightly on the side of your laptop. "Oh, and give Eridan my well wishes, it seems I have to log off right now, somebody is attempting to get my attention via home phone." He stated, adjusting his camera. "Okay, bye Kankri!" You call, waving lightly with a smile on your face. "Goodbye, Karkat. Have a good night."

**Eridan Ampora**: You munched on the sandwich happily, sipping your tea, feeling the warmth surge through you, loving the feeling the warm mug left on your lips. The conversation that Karkat had with his family left you a warm feeling in your heart that made it feel like it grew 3 times bigger then before. You let a smile spread across your face chuckling at Kankri's forced tone of voice vibrate through the laptops speakers. Chuckling a bit. You finished your tea and sandwich, leaning back against the pillow, falling to sleep instantly.

**Karkat Vantas**: You were about to ask Eridan if it was alright that your sisters were going to be over soon, but you found yourself laughing silently when you saw he had fallen asleep, his eyes fluttered close and his face looking utterly in peace. His beaten up form still looking absolutely beautiful. You leant over and kissed his cheek, standing up and leaving the laptop on the end of his bed, planning to come back to him after you had cleaned up the house.

**Karkat Vantas**: When you heard the knock at the front door, you quickly pulled yourself off the kitchen table, leaving your tea forgotten as you skipped to the door, swinging it open and grinning at the two girls standing in your door. "Karkitty!" Nepeta squealed, launching herself into her own, bright blue stuffed kitty in her hand. You chuckle and pick her up, stepping backwards as you held her tightly against your chest, allowing Meulin to step inside before kicking the door shut lightly. You let out a soft yelp as Nepeta ran a hand through your hair, grazing the cut at the back of your head and you winced, setting her down lightly. "Careful, my heads really sore today for some reason." You mumble, brushing the bangs out of your face. "Go ahead, make yourself at home. I have to go wake Eridan up."

**Eridan Ampora**: Your head was pounding when you heard Karkat enter the room, you groan, "Kar, do we have any Advil or pain killers of that sort?" You pushed yourself into a sitting position, your hand resting on your head in agony. Everything hurt, badly. Your arms, head, legs, stomach. It all hurt. This stuff doesn't just heal over night.

**Karkat Vantas**: "Yeah, I'm so sorry I didn't wake you up to tell you, but my sisters are here. They want to see you." You mumble, pulling the bottle of Advil out of the dresser drawer that Eridan obviously hadn't put anything in or taken anything out of yet. "I'm really sorry, I should have woken you up. It would be completely understandable if you wanted to stay in here, I mean-." You cut yourself up, to stop your rambling. "I'll go get you some water."

**Eridan Ampora**: You blink, trying to get all of the information Karkat had just sputtered out. "It's no problem, I'd love to see your sisters," You smiled slightly. "Thanks Kar, I never thought to look for the Advil there." you added.

**Karkat Vantas**: You return a few moments later and hand him the water, smiling shyly as you watched him take the pill. You stretched your arms lightly as you leant down next to him, wrapping your arm around his feet and helping him to his feet, allowing him to lean on you as you lead him to the living-room. You heard the gasp of Meulin and the confused whimper of Nepeta as you helped Eridan settle himself on the couch. "Eri? What happened?" Nepeta questioned, standing up and kneeling on the floor by his feet.

**Eridan Ampora**: Maybe staying in bed would have been a lot better. You didn't want to tell them your dramatic story, "Oh, uh nothing really, I just had a really big tumble down the stairs. Nobody warned me about them." You said, with a sigh of relief,hoping that would be an illegible excuse.

**Karkat Vantas**: You smile as Nepeta pouts lightly, standing up and wrapping her arms around his neck loosely, pressing a soft kiss to his nose with a giggle. "I hope you get better soon, Eri." She smiles, poking his nose with her finger before she skips over to Meulin, retaking the seat she had previously had, right in between her, and a couch cushion. With a light laugh you settle yourself on the couch beside Eridan, hesitantly lacing your fingers through his and resting your hands on your shoulder. Everything was going fine, laughter echoing across the room. Until Eridan reached up to brush a piece of hair from your face, and you ended up letting out a yelp and jumping away, burying your face in your knees. Well fuck, didn't you just fucked things up now didn't you.

**Eridan Ampora**: "Kar?" You say sympathetically, reaching out to him, but then not, knowing that he probably didn't want you near him. Your head hung low and you stared at your hands which were placed on your lap.

**Karkat Vantas**: "Fuck." You whisper, your nails digging into the palms of your hand. You should not have done that. You should not have fucking done that. Especially not in front of Nepeta and Meulin. "Karkitty?" Nepeta's cute voice asked, causing your head to spring up and look at her. She had moved and was now standing in front of you, reaching for your hand. You needed a back up plan, and you needed one quick. You plastered a smile across your face and pulled her into your lap, wrapping your arms around her as you tickled her stomach lightly. "Karkitty!" She squealed, pushing you away as she giggled. Yes, you win this round. Vantas.

**Eridan Ampora**: Your gaze went to confused and sad, to amused and laughing in a couple of seconds. Karkat really was a great brother to them. You had to admire him for that. Your smile was fake though, Karkat wasn't over the fact that he was scared of you.

**Karkat Vantas**: An hour passed and Nepeta and Meulin had to make their leave, they had both hugged Eridan before attacking you in a bear hug, almost knocking you to the ground. "Jesus shit, guys lay off on the 'attempt to kill Karkat shit'" You laugh, breaking the hug as you leant forward and held the door open for them, their sad smiles of goodbye making you smile sadly. "I promise, we'll come out and visit you soon." You smile, nodding towards the living-room before you said one last goodbye and shut the door. You made your way back into the living-room, standing in the doorway. "Look.. I'm sorry Eridan.. I made a scene and I shouldn't have.. I'm not scared of you or anything.. it's just-" You sigh and drop your gaze down to the floor. "When.. When my father used to hit me, I couldn't have anyone touch me anywhere unless I was watching, and you kinda took me by surprise. I'm sorry."

Eridan Ampora: "No, I should be the one apologizing...I should have known better." You say sadly. You look at Karkat, all you could do was look at him sympathetically for the past days, you were an awful person.

Karkat Vantas: "No, you wouldn't have known. I didn't tell you." you sigh and walk over to the couch, settling yourself beside him, tangling your fingers through his. "I looooooove you." you coo in a babyish voice as you bury your face into the crook of his neck. Ah, such comfort.

**Eridan Ampora**: "And I loooooooove you too." You reply back, mimicking the others soft, murmuring tone of voice. Resting your head on his, making a cheesy smile spread across your face. You never knew how paranoid Karkat was, even if you knew about his dad hitting him. It made sense now. Maybe if you treated Karkat like a king, rather then a prince, he would get over that fear. Even if it was a difficult thing to get over, you understood.

**Karkat Vantas**: You smiled happily and wrapped your arms around his waist. Careful of the wound on his stomach. So much shit had happened to you in the past couple days, but you didn't blame Eridan for anything that he had done. The only reason he had acted negatively towards you was because you influenced him by violence. With a upturn to the corners of your lips, you brush a tuft of his hair out of his face. Pressing a soft kiss to his forehead. "Forever and always."

**Eridan Ampora**: You mumbled a 'mhm' and put one of your weak arms around his shoulder, pulling him closer into a kiss. A smile breaking through, as you kissed him lightly, pulling away from him quickly. "Ugh, you're just too cute, Kar." You say, your smile widening as you looked at him straight in the eyes. His beautiful, beautiful eyes. How they sparkled was what got you. And his cutesy little nose. You kissed the top of it as well squeezing your eyes shut with a smile.

**Karkat Vantas**: You laughed lightly. No. No you were sure that was a giggle. A really manly giggle. "You're quite the cutie too if I do say so myself." You let out an excited gasp when you noticed the dimples on his cheeks, and you rolled over onto his lap, being extremely careful that you didn't hurt him so you pressed your fingers against them, highly entertained by your new found joy.

**Eridan Ampora**: "Oh my god..." You chuckle, as the joy on Karkat's face ignite. Wrapping your arms around his torso, not knowing where else to put them anyways. His highly entertained face, giving yourself your own entertainment as you smiled bigger, bringing out your dimples even more, making Karkat's face light p even more. "What's with people and their obsession over dimples these days?È You ask, with a little laugh.

**Karkat Vantas**: "Honestly. I couldn't tell you. But jesus shit." You chuckle, smiling at his dimples once more before your eyes connected with his, and you sat in silence for a few seconds before you bring your hands up to his face, cupping his cheeks lightly as you press a soft kiss to his lips. "They look fucking adorable on you, that's why I'm so excited about them." You giggle, poking them once again.

**Eridan Ampora**: "Of course." You say slightly shaking your head, your big smile going smaller, but still there. A light blush spreading like wild fire on your face, getting flustered with Karkat's new found discovery that lingered on your face. Your eyebrows cocked up. "Still having fun there, love?"

**Karkat Vantas**: "I'm never going to stop having fun with these, thank-you." You chuckle, getting an idea and leaning down and pressing a kiss to both his dimples before returning to his lips, laughing lightly. "We're cute." You mumble, slipping down for another kiss before sliding off of his lap and onto the couch beside him.

**Eridan Ampora**: "Yeah, I agree." You say with a soft laugh, closing your eyes. A sigh escaped your lips, as you felt him crawl off of you, missing his warmth on top of you. Your head was pounding, and your arms felt raw. But you took a deep breath in and out gettig over the pain.

**Karkat Vantas**: After a while of sitting there in silence, you groaned and slid your head onto Eridan's lap. Your hands reaching up and tangling in his hair as you smoothed your thumbs repetitively over your face. "Before you come up with some smart-ass remark. I'm growing an liking to touching your face." You chuckle, running your fingers lightly under his eyes with a smile, staring up into the beauty of the irregularly colored blue orbs. "Fuuuuuck, you're perfect."

**Eridan Ampora**: "No you are." You say in a sing-song-tone of voice. Cocking your head to the side you bopped his nose and crinkled your face, smiling. "God, you really are too perfect." You gazed down at him, at his high cheek bones, his beautiful lightened eyes, how his hair practically glowed red. Everything about him screamed handsome, cute, adorable. But alas Karkat was beyond all of those words, he was like an angel.

**Karkat Vantas**: "Okay, let's just settle this now and say we're both pretty fucking flawless." you crinkle your nose and wince lightly as he hooped your nose. You loved Eridan. You loved him so fucking much. His heart was made of pure fucking gold and the only thing you had ever hoped for in life was somebody like him. And you had found him, and you weren't planning on letting go anytime soon, in risk of losing your sanity.

**Eridan Ampora**: "Ok, fine by me, Mr. Perfect." You smiled down at him. Lacing your fingers through his hair pushing it away from his forehead; his hair was really soft, like a little kitten. You thought of his name, Karkat. His name said it all, car cat. You couldn't stop yourself from laughing at your own stupid little joke, beginning to stroke his hair gently.

**Karkat Vantas**: "I swear to god if you're thinking what I think you are I'm going to kill everything that you love." you growled jokingly under your breath. He was petting your hair the way one would do a cat, and by now he had already pieced together your name and the fact that your hair was uncontrollably soft. "If you start comparing me to a kitten like TZ did-" you cut yourself off with a frown.

**Eridan Ampora**: "I'll stop if you want me to..." You said solemnly. Stroking his hair seized, and you placed your hand down on the cushion beside you. Looking down at him with your eyebrow cocked upward. You had no idea Kar was so sensitive towards that. But you guess Terezi made it all the worse. "I'm sorry."

**Karkat Vantas**: "No, hey don't stop. I should have been past that now I guess." you shrug your shoulders and laugh nervously. Jesus weren't you just fucking up the happy mood tonight. You shouldn't have even made that comparison, but you did and you felt really horrible about it. She was in the past, but you couldn't let go of the things she did, and it was driving you insane.

**Eridan Ampora**: "Alright" You say with a slight smile spreading across your face. Your hand going back up to Karkat's fluffy red hair, stroking it again. Loving the feeling of it against your hands, it was just so soft. So, much, comfort. Such, relax.

**Karkat Vantas**: You smile and groan with a noise that sounded almost like a purr, causing you to mentally smack yourself. Goddamn you weren't making this any easier on yourself. You nuzzled your face lightly into his stomach, drawing patterns across the middle of his shirt with your fore and index finger. Jesus, you loved being in the presence of such a wonderful being. "We should probably eat something soon, but I'm really too tired to get up, and I'm really comfortable too." You sigh, taking in a deep breath that helped you relax further.

**Eridan Ampora**: "Ah, the struggles of life." You say with sarcasm lacing your voice, rolling your eyes. "But yes, it is comfortable, and I don't want to get up as well." You sigh, shivering at his touch. "By the way, that was a cute sound you made... Karkitty." You snickered, you embraced yourself, expecting a smack from Karkat, still laughing.

**Karkat Vantas**: "I swear to fucking god." You mumble, your cheeks flushing bright red as you covered your hands with your face, complete and utter embarrassment crossing your features. "You're such a little shit, I swear to god Eridan." You were furiously urging your blush to go away, but you couldn't manage to. So apparently your boyfriend had adopted the nickname that your sister had called you since you were little children. Oh the joy surging through your veins sure was unstoppable!

**Eridan Ampora**: You basically giggled as Karkat's face went a bright red colour. "Aw, come on Kar, It's a cute name for you!" You smile, trying to pry his hands off of his cute face. God, he was so over dramatic some times, and that's what you loved about him.

**Karkat Vantas**: You squealed as Eridan's fingers attempted at prying your own away from your face. But you soon found yourself guilty of bursting into uncontrollable giggles as he continued with his act. Holy shit, he was bringing out your inner child. Everything was all fun and games until you accidentally elbowed Eridan in the stomach, right where his freshly made wound resided.

**Eridan Ampora**: As Karkat elbowed you, you made a weird wheezing sound mixed with a little yelp in pain. You quickly pulled your hand to your stomach, clutching it in agony. God, that hurt more then it should have. You took a deep breath in and out, trying to forget about the pain, but the fiery sensation still crept where your opened flesh was.

**Karkat Vantas**: "Fuck." You whispered. God fucking damn it Vantas? This is the.. what? Third time you have royally fucked up within a time period of only a few hours? You wince as you catch sight of Eridan's clenched closed eyes and you slowly lower yourself into his lap, lightly pushing his hand away from his stomach so you had access to make sure you hadn't reopened the cut, and as you move his shirt out of the way, you sigh in relief, slowly easing yourself onto his shoulder so you wouldn't cause him pain. "I'm so sorry. Shit, I should have been more careful."

Eridan Ampora: "It's fine, it was just an accident Kar." You sighed shakily. Still a roaring pain on your stomach. "You couldn't have stopped yourself anyways. It really is fine, things happen." You smile reassuringly even if Karkat couldn't see it. Karkat Vantas: "No, I hurt you. Even if by accident. Shit, are you really okay?" You question, your eyes trailing over him and giving him a once over, making sure that every part of him was intact. You could see the pain in his eyes, and how hard he was trying to cover it up, and you didn't like it. You didn't like it at all. "Do you want me to grab you some more Advil, Painkillers, Ice-Cream? Anything?"

Eridan Ampora: "Pain killers would be great, and ice-cream, wow ice-cream does sound good about now." You say with a bigger smile spreading across your face. The pain bursting into a bigger flame, it shouldn't of been hurting this much, and it shouldn't be getting worse but it was. You could feel the pain lurk more deeper in; so this is what it was like for girls on their periods. But it was better than being chopped in half, that's for sure.

Karkat Vantass: You could tell that your eyes were still consumed with worry as you lift yourself off of his lap, nearly jogging into the kitchen to grab the bottle of pain killers from above the sink. Also grabbing him a glass of water and resting the both of them on the counter as you pulled out the tub of chocolate icecream, resting it on the counter as you took hold of the glass of water and painkillers as you made your way back to Eridan.

Eridan Ampora: It was like dancing with the devil, as you clutched your stomach, feeling the pain rumble inside. When Karkat got back, you took the bottle of painkillers, slipping out two of the small white pills. Popping them back in your mouth with a flick of your wrist, and taking a swig of the glass of water, swallowing. As you chugged down the water, you looked up at your worry filled boyfriend. "You don't have to worry about me that much," You sigh, shaking your head, "I'm fine, it's just a little pain subsiding in my stomach, it's okay."

Karkat Vantas: "I'm going to be worried about you because I care about you." you smile halfheartedly, cocking your head to the side. "You're obviously not ok, so I'm not going to treat you like you aren't in pain." you sigh, leaning down and trailing your finger down the smooth skin of his bruised skin. "I'm going to take care of you." Eridan Ampora: You sighed, feeling his finger trail your bruises, shivering at the warm touch he gave. "Fine, whatever you think is right, Doctor Vantas." You say with a smirk. Your frail body was falling asleep, it was going numb, and you felt the tingling sensation strike you. You shifted your body, uncomfortably trying to find a better spot for your self. Hoping you didn't have to go through that horrible feeling on your ass.

Karkat Vantas: "Now, I'm going to go get that icecream. You sit tight." you smile, removing your fingers from his face as you turned on your heel, heading off to the kitchen as you prepared Eridan's icecream. Filling it with a sizable amount of icecream for the both of you, coating the top with whipped cream and mini marshmallows. God-damn this was a lot of sugar. You smirked lightly as you grabbed two spoons, slamming the drawer closed as you headed back to Eridan's side.

Eridan Ampora: "You even added marshmallows, my hero." You smirked, grabbing one of the spoons he handed out to you. Scooping out a bit of ice-cream, you stuck it in your mouth with a smile on your face, feeling the coldness against your tongue and all of the sugar going through your body. God, ice-cream was great, and so was Karkat, just God damn.

Karkat Vantas: "Well." you shrug as you stuck your own spoon into the frozen concoction. "I can't that I don't love marshmallows. Even though I'm not obsessive over them like you are. And if something makes you happy, it makes me happy." you crinkle your nose and lean over, pressing a soft kiss to his nose before pulling away and shoving the spoonful of sugar into your mouth. "We're cute. I ship us."

Eridan Ampora: "I ship us too," You say with a chuckle. Picking out a few marshmallows and plopping them into your mouth. "These marshmallows are really sweet, but not as sweet as you." You spoke in a sing-song-tone. Taking another scoop and letting it melt in your mouth. What a healthy dinner you two were having.

Karkat Vantas: "Are we going to start the cute comebacks thing because I believe I've got a few up my sleeve." you chuckle, a mischievous grin appearing on your lips as you shoved another spoonful into your mouth, looking thoughtfully at the ceiling as you thought of something to say, before throwing your hands up in a triumphant gesture. "If I hadn't met you, I wouldn't like you. If I didn't like you, I wouldn't love you. If I didn't love you, I wouldn't miss you. But I did, I do, and I will."

Eridan Ampora: "I don't know if I could be without you, cause boy you complete me." You say with a laugh, shaking your head, "We're cheesy as hell, this is horrible..." You smirked, knowing you made a reference to something but hoping Karkat would notice, because it was golden.

Karkat Vantas: "This is horrible, let's just eat our icecream because goddamn, this is horrifying. Like.. A nightmare gone wrong, but I find myself actually liking this." you chuckle, knowing fully well that you didn't make any sense whatsoever. "I'm probably going to pass out after this I'm not even exaggerating." you groan, a yawn escaping your lips as you took another spoonful of icecream. God, this was the life.

Eridan Ampora: As you two finished the ice-cream, Karkat was practically half asleep. "Don't worry, I'll clean it up," You say as you struggled to get up, thank god the pills were kicking in. With the bowl in your hand, making it harder to regain your balance. When you finally got up you shuffled to the kitchen and put the bowl in the sink; you would clean it up tomorrow, right now you had a half asleep boyfriend to get to bed. Feeling a little bit better, your walk having more energy to it, you went to go check up on Karkat, of course he fell asleep. You slung your arm behind his knees and the other arm supporting his back, hoisting him up, you let out a low grunt. You were still not one hundred percent ok, but you could still carry him. Making your way to his bedroom you gently dropped him on the bed and tucking him in, flopping beside him cautiously so you wouldn't hurt yourself. A few minutes later, you drifted into a deep slumber.


	13. The World Spins Round

Karkat Vantass: Your body was sore from the amount of pain he was putting you through. Blow after blow, hit after hit. Everything hurt. And you knew you were the reason that the rage was burning in his eyes, and intense guilt attacked you like one of his blows. You could feel the excruciating pain coruscating through your veins, and you felt yourself slip into unconsciousness. But not exactly, your eyes fluttered open and widened, feeling the strong grip of the man who had beat you senseless in your dreams, and with a unheard yelp, you pulled away from him, bloodshot eyes wide. With a shake to your head, and a ruffle to your own hair, you stood up. Your body still aching and sore as you headed to the kitchen, more than ready to take a few pills to cease the ache.

Eridan Ampora: Have you ever met some one, and they're so fucking perfect in every way. And maybe they aren't perfect to everybody, but to you they were just absolutely amazing. The way they laugh and smile and talk and think and look and just everything about them and everything they do just keeps amazing you. Well, that person was Karkat. He was the reason you fell asleep peacefully at night, and the reason why you were happier. You tossed and turned, finally giving up on sleep. Rising up slowly, your head throbbing in pain; not again. You sighed, flopping back down again, not caring if the impact made your head throb even more.

Karkat Vantass: You were scared, beyond scared if you wanted to be exact. You had made Eridan breakfast and kept it in the microwave to keep it warm, before you wrote out a quick note on a post-it, not bothering to put on a change of clothes, or do your hair. You didn't care that you looked like hell warmed over. You threw your loose hoodie over your back, tossing your phone and keys in your pocket. It was time to talk to Kankri.

Eridan Ampora: When you finally decided to get your ass out of bed, it felt like it was already late enough to go back to bed. But it wasn't; you sighed and walked out of the room sluggishly. Entering the kitchen to where Karkat usually was. Alas, Karkat wasn't there, but a little note attached to the counter. You tried to read it but you didn't have your reading glasses on you at the moment and you couldn't read shit. With a sigh you squinted and tried your best trying to figure out the blurred lines written on the little note. Something about breakfast? and going out for a bit? You didn't exactly know, but with a shrug you opened up the microwave grabbing the plate and slouched down onto the kitchen table munching on the food. What to do now?

Karkat Vantass: You knocked on Kankri's door hesitantly. You knew very well that he didn't mind listening to your problems, but you were still worried for nonsensical reasons. When he door swung open, your eyes were still glued to the ground, and you were tapping your foot against the white wood that covered his porch, feeling your anxiety spike as you lifted your eyes to his all familiar blue eyes, a confused look across his face. "Karkat, are you okay? What happened?" He asked, stepping forward and lightly grasping onto your shoulders with worried eyes. "I'm okay, I just wanted to ask you for some.. advice you could say?" Kankri nodded and stepped back, one hand still on your shoulder as he led you into his house, shutting the door behind the both of you as he settled you in the living-room on one of the pastel purple couches. "About Eridan?" you nodded hesitantly. "Tell me what happened." You nodded your head and looked down to the ground. "He's been trying to cope with recent events, and he couldn't find a way to do so, so he relied on alcohol. He wasn't in his right mind and he came on to me, and I pushed him away, knowing that he would regret what he was doing in the morning, but he refused to let me go. One thing led to another and I ended up kicking him away from me which.. caused a negative outburst on his side. He took my head and slammed it hard enough to break the skin at the back of my head and.. I-I still love him and I don't loathe him or look at him as less than what he was to me a few days ago. But I'm scared.. I'm so scared that it's going to happen again and I don't know what to do. I love him with all my heart and I keep flinching whenever he touches me, and did I mention the nightmares? I don't know what to do anymore." By the end of your speech you ended up with your head in your hands, your body shaking as you held back tears.

Karkat Vantass: You flinched slightly when you felt Kankri's weight fall onto the cushion beside you. "It's not just him, nobody can make a move near me without me flinching." you sigh. "I understand Karkat, this reaction isn't going to cease anytime soon. It's natural, and my best word of advice would be to stay strong. Try to keep him away from anything to do with alcohol, and even though you may be hesitant to, if you find any. Take it away. That's what I always did with Dad, even though it does sometimes summon a bad reaction, if he loves you enough, he won't do anything to hurt you. I can tell he loves you very much, and you love him just the same, you guys are going to be just fine." He whispers, wrapping an arm around your waist, being careful not to startle you. "And you know that if anything happens, you can come to me. Because I'm always here, it's not like I have many friends anyways." He mumbles, rubbing his fingers across your back.

Eridan Ampora: You finished your breakfast and leaned back on the chair, your whole body throbbing in pain. With your eyes closed in agony, you got up hesitantly. You know it wasn't a smart idea to think, but maybe you could head out to the pub? Get your mind off of things, off of your pain. Maybe. You grabbed the extra strength painkillers and knocked down a couple. Swallowing hard. Heading to your room to get some spare change of clothes, so you wouldn't look like complete shit heading out, and especially if you saw your dad again; you took a pocket knife with you, just in case. You clutched the light blue handle of it, feeling the smoothness of it. Just in case, just to be safe. Putting it in your back pocket, feeling it slide down. With a sigh you headed out the door, putting on your purple jacket that was too big for you, it almost looked like a magicians cape when it was on you. How ridiculous.

Karkat Vantas: You headed home shortly after talking with Kankri, his words of encouragement as you walked out the door the only real reason that you didn't head out somewhere instead of going home. You fished your keys out of your pocket, your body unsteady as you stepped through the door. Your head was beginning to ache again as you called out Eridan's name, surprised when you didn't get a response, he should have been awake by now, it was late afternoon. You spent a few minutes checking through the rooms of your apartment letting a strong of curses out when you couldn't find him anywhere. Where the fuck was he?

Eridan Ampora: As you walked down the street, all you could feel was guilt. You pushed the thoughts away and went faster, pushing your hands in your pockets, putting your head down. Watching your feet go do the walking thing. You checked your wallet, good you had enough to make you forget. You pushed the bar door open, stepping inside. It wasn't the proper drinking time, but you ordered a beer and chugged that thing down, ordering another one and doing the same. You did this until you felt the warm, buzz inside of you.

Karkat Vantas: The worry house were feeling right now wasn't definable. You sat on the couch, your legs pulled up to your chest as your glazed over eyes stared at the wall. Once again, he had forgotten his phone at home, leaving you with no way to contact him. Your muscles were tight and your brain hurts and you were praying to god that be hadn't wound himself where you suspected. With a shaky sigh you rested your head upon your knees, focusing on anything other than Eridan.

Eridan Ampora: You lost track of how many drinks you've had. The thoughts swarming around you head turning into a big mush of nothingness. Thank god your dad didn't show up, maybe he was somewhere fancier than this run down bar. Why would he even be here in the first place? who even knows? As you sipped down the last of your drinks, you blacked out.

Karkat Vantas: You jump visibly when the door slams open much like the first time Eridan had gone to the pub, and your heart rate quickened with every staggered footstep you heard as he made his down the hallway. Your body began to shake as he finally approached, nothing about his composure telling you that he was sober.

Eridan Ampora: You dropped your jacket to the floor behind you. A hungry look to your eyes as you looked Karkat up and down; you licked your alcohol flavored lips, feeling the dryness of them from the cold. Your fucked up thoughts telling you to move forward. You straddle your legs around his, trapping him between your legs. Slouching over you kissed him hard, grabbing his shoulders roughly so he wouldn't be able to squirm around.

Karkat Vantas: Fuck, shit. No, this wasnt happening. This was another one of your nightmares. It had to be. There was no way this was happening. You let out a yelp when Eridan's mouth resided to your neck, sucking harshly enough to leave a bruise as you stood unable to move, tears flooding your eyes as your body was overwhelmed by his. You pressed your hands against his chest but he wouldn't budge. And after struggling some more and ending up with a bruise against your jaw. You gave in. You didn't fight back as you felt every strip of innocence being ripped from you.

Eridan Ampora: You woke up to a throbbing head, and no memory to what happened last night. You felt raw, and horrible and sick. The last thing you remembered was that you were at the bar. Now you were in your bed waking up from a major hang over. You didn't want to get up, but you did; you headed to the kitchen where you normally saw Karkat. "Kar?" You called out pathetically and groggily. That was probably the quickest time you got out of bed.

Karkat Vantas: You had managed to barely pull yourself out of bed this morning, change your clothes, take a shower and focus on clearing the bruise off of your arms and jaw with at least three quarters of the bottle you had left. You were so unstable and you hurt everywhere, just making yourself a simple bowl of cereal put intense strain on your muscles. You couldn't believe you had given up so easily, allowing yourself to submit to his actions so easily. You truly were a pathetic being, you had plenty of opportunities to fight back bug you didn't use them. When you heard the weak call of Eridan's groggy voice, you barely managed to lace your face with a believable smile.

Eridan Ampora: "What happened last night?" You ask, rubbing your temples, trying to subdue the pain within. A slight frown coming across your face, as you stood there, helpless and left for nothing. You closed your eyes, a lot of days went by with the pain you had to deal with, getting worse and worse. The look on Karkat's face, that fake smile, made you furrow your brows together. You knew you did something last night that you were going to regret.

Karkat Vantas: "Nothing happened! You came home.. And I forced you to go to sleep because you were pissed, and then i went to sleep in my own room, why?" you struggled to keep your composure intact as you spoke, the fear of breaking down and spilling overwhelmed your senses. You slowly stood up to walk into the sink, hiding the present limp of your leg as you hoisted yourself onto the counter, smiling fakely as you crossed your legs painfully.

Eridan Ampora: "No that's not what happened... I know when you're in pain Kar, and right now, you are in major pain." You stayed where you were, a pained look crossing your face. What did you do this time? The same question repeating itself, "And I know when you are lying, it pretty obvious, now, with you squirming around and all."

Karkat Vantas: "No, honestly I'm fine. These jeans are just really tight and uncomfortable." you groaned, pulling them up in the back for added effect. "I'm not in pain, I'm actually doing quite alright." you chuckle, lacking the enthusiasm that you usually would have carried. You kept that stupid, face smile plastered pathetically on your face. Only with extreme difficulty would you be able to keep this a secret.

Eridan Ampora: "Fine, whatever floats your boat Kar." You say with a hint of annoyance lacing your words. You shook your head solemnly and headed back into your room, not saying another word. He was lying, and you knew it. You've done something awfully terrible for him not to tell you. And that was heart breaking. Your bed was beckoning you, as you flopped down on it, burying your face in your pillow. You were a horrible, stubborn and just an awful person.

Karkat Vantas: The second Eridan dissipated around the corner, your gaze dropped and your eyes watered up, he knew you were lying. And he wasn't to pleased to know of that fact. "God, I'm such an idiot." you mumble to yourself, feeling tears well in the back of your eyes. Fucking damn it. Eventually you gave up with trying to keep the tears back and you rushed off to your room, collapsing against the stuffed crab that Eridan had given you so many years ago. All you could do was cry.

Eridan Ampora: How much self-hatred you had for yourself was infinite. You hated yourself every second of that minute, and hating yourself even more every minute for as long as you stayed there, buried in the soft fabric of your bed. When you were finally done with moping around, you got up, put some decent clothes on, put on your shoes and with a slam of the door you were out of there. Not to go to the pub, but to get away from there. The bottom of your shoes were probably getting scuffed up by how you shuffled your feet on the rough gravel. Keeping your head low, the tears finally came, God you were pathetic. Karkat Vantas: As you heard the front door slam, that flare of fear spiked up once again but you couldn't find the motivation to get out of your bed. Your arms were wrapped tightly around your tear-stained crab, and you were extremely comfortable. Extremely comfortable and scared were never good combinations, so with a groan you forced yourself off the bed, your hand still wrapped tightly around Signless' claw. You were planning in making yourself some tea, and scrolling through Netflix until you had found an appropriate movie to watch, just so you could try and get your mind off things.

**Eridan Ampora**: The stinging in your eyes made it much worse, the feeling of the new tears pouring down your cheeks suddenly turning cold when faced with the weather. Your steps faltering, as you leaned against a brick wall, wiping at you eyes desperately, trying to get rid of your tears. Screaming internally, you were frail and withered. Staying there a few minutes, you finally left and went back home. But, it took you hours to get back. You opened the door, basically tripping over your own feet.

**Karkat Vantas**: You nearly jumped out of your seat when Eridan returned home, pushing your laptop onto the couch cushions and rushing as fast as your sore body could to the door. Your eyes widened when you caught sight of Eridan's unstable body and you rushed to his side, wrapping an arm around his waist to steady him. "Jesus Christ." You mumbled, assisting him to the couch where your laptop was still playing the movie you had been watching. "What happened?" You questioned, sliding down onto the cushion beside him. From what you managed to catch, he had been crying. His eyes were bloodshot and rimmed with red, and you couldn't stop the wave of guilt that came over you.

**Eridan Ampora**: "I'm still not one hundred percent healed from my dad, and that walked basically killed me." You said with a groan, "Everything is just falling apart." You tilted your head back to rest on the cushion. Your head pounding per usual.

**Karkat Vantas**: "Please, if this is hurting you don't go out. I don't want you to be in any more pain." You whisper, running your fingers through his bangs and trailing your fingers down his cheek. He seemed so broken down, so destroyed. And you didn't like it. You didn't like it one bit. "Here, I'm going to go get some blankets, get you some medicine, and get us some food and ice-cream. And we can watch movies all afternoon, how does that sound?" You question, pressing a soft kiss to the corner of his lips and standing up, a light smile gracing your lips.

**Eridan Ampora**: "Sounds wonderful." You say with a fake, cheery smile. Karkat did practically everything for you. He was like a caring mother you never had, it was wonderful. Or maybe your guardian angel in disguise. Never the less, you felt like shit, Karkat did do everything for you and you felt helpless about it; you didn't want him to keep worrying about you. Your smile started to fade as your thoughts kept on swarming your head, giving you an even more bigger headache.

**Karkat Vantas**: You headed out to the kitchen, grabbing a few items of food and a bowl of icecream big enough for the both of you. You had your quilt slung over your shoulder, a smile on your face as you skipped into the Living Room, throwing the quilt over Eridan, as you settled yourself down on the couch beside him. You rested the bowl of icecream between the two of you, tossing the various candy bars onto Eridan's lap as you pulled your laptop back onto your own. "So, what do you wanna watch?"

**Karkat Vantas**: You regretted the decision of watching an upsetting movie the second tears started streaming down your face. And with a light sniffle you wiped the tears away, staring at your hands for a second before your eyes widened drastically. Welp, there goes the foundation covering your jaw.

**Eridan Ampora**: "What's wr-" You cut yourself off, seeing the covered up bruise, not so covered up now. A slight gasp escaping your mouth, it looked horrible; what did you do to him. "How did you get that?" You asked worriedly, if he lied to you this time you were going to flip shit.

**Karkat Vantas**: You frowned and cupped your cheek with your hand, moving slightly away from him. "It's nothing, I fell last night and I didn't want you to worry about me so I covered it up. I'm sorry." you frowned, not lifting your head to look at him. Just from the posture he held, you knew he knew you were lying, so you did the first thing you could think of. You stood off and hurried to the bathroom, locking the door behind you.

**Eridan Ampora**: "I know you're lying!" You shouted after him, your face shocked red with anger. Your anger boiling up inside you, just like a kettle, you snapped. Rising to your feet, you went to the locked door. "Why are you lying to me?" You practically yelled at the door, banging on it's wooden surface, not too harshly. "Why can't you tell me...?" Your voice trembling, trying to fight back the tears. You were an emotional wreck.

**Karkat Vantas**: "Y-You know those moments when you try to say something, but the words don't come out?" your quivering voice stated, not trusted to it's full extent by you. You waited for a reply, but you never got one. "I find myself not fucking able to tell you what I want to, because I don't want you thinking worse of yourself than you already do. I'm fucking terrified!" You almost exclaim, your fist coming down against the hard granite of your counter-top, emphasizing your words. "That you're going to attempt again, because life would be absolutely fucking hopeless without you and I couldn't do that again." Your whole body began to shake, whether from anger or sadness you couldn't tell. "I-I love you too much to watch you go through that again, and whenever you drink I don't even know if you're yourself anymore. You scare the living shit out of me Eridan, and I don't know what to do." You swallow and take a deep voice before continuing. "I know you're fucking beyond pissed at me, but I can't loose you again, Eridan."

**Eridan Ampora**: You were at a loss. The thought of drinking again came up, no you couldn't do that. Cut again? you haven't done that in a long time, and you weren't going to. You didn't know what else to say. A mix of anger and sadness ran through you at the speed of light. You didn't know what to do. It was like a devil swarming your thoughts, and it wouldn't leave you alone; it's like you found a friend who was in it for the bitter end. Without saying a word you went to your room. Quietly closing it behind you. You collapse on your bed for the second time today,but this time the tears came pouring down your face like bullets instantly. How could you put Karkat through your shit? He already had enough bullshit running through his life. How could you let that happen.

**Karkat Vantas**: As you heard Eridan walk away and close the door behind him, you exited the bathroom, tears rolling down your own face as you walked to his bedroom, hesitating your hand against the wooden door before you decided to just walk in. You slowly make your way over to his beside, slipping down onto your side beside him. "If you must know, yes you did hit me again. And- And you went even further than me. You took advantage of me, and because I wasn't strong enough, I couldn't push you away. I couldn't fucking do it. No matter how hard I tried, I couldn't do it. But I still find myself unable to blame you for it, unable to treat you any differently than I would any other day." You sighed and rested a hand on his back. "And I'm so fucking sorry that I'm not strong enough to fight back. I'm fucking pathetic. Pathetic? Yeah, that's the word I'm looking for."


	14. Little Talks

**Eridan Ampora**: "No..." You mumble into your pillows, agony and guilt, no beyond guilt, creep through you. You did not like what came out of Karkat's mouth, not at all. Wishing to a god above that it wasn't real. But alas, it was, you knew when he was lying and when he wasn't. You started to sob, your back heaving up and down trying to get air through your sobs. "You're not pathetic, I am, I shouldn't have even went out to the stupid pub, and I shouldn't even have came back that intoxicated. I'm so sorry Karkat, beyond sorry. I don't even know if I can live with myself the same knowing what I did to you." You managed to say through your sobs, you were so done with yourself, you just wanted to hurl, you were so sick of yourself.

**Karkat Vantas**: You continue the steady pace of your hand across his back, rubbing soothing circles. Wanting to try your best to prove him that everything was going to be alright; because it was. But once again you found yourself at loss of words, unable to speak what you wanted to get out. You wanted to tell him he wasn't the pathetic one, and that it wasn't his fault but you couldn't. "I- I just think that I could have, and should have been stronger being put under the situation that I was, but I wasn't. I don't know how to deal with this, and I don't think I ever will." You mumble, your voice being cut off by a sob as you collapse onto the bed beside him, burying your face in his side. "I-I love you, so fucking much, Eridan."

**Eridan Ampora**: "It was not your fault but mine, I really fucked it up, didn't I?" You say in between sobs, feeling his presence beside you, you couldn't help but murmur the three words you wanted to say the most, "I love you...and I'm so sorry, you have no idea how sorry I am."

**Karkat Vantas**: You stood there for a second before snaking an arm around Eridan's back, your face resting nicely against his warm skin. This was what you needed right now, you needed his comfort. You needed him to support you, and you couldn't bring yourself to blame him for anything that he had done, the bruises would fade and so would the emotional trauma, but he was your everything and you could never let him go. "I-I forgive you." You whisper, a light smile pulling up on your tear stained cheeks. "And everything is going to be okay, and that's a promise I can't break."

**Eridan Ampora**: "Thank you" you whispered, snuggling up to him. This is what you needed, it's what they both needed; each other. Wrapping their arms around each other, feeling the others warmth, just like the past. But the past was as fucked up as the present.

**Karkat Vantas**: You couldn't help but smile as you rested your forehead against Eridan's, your fingers moving to lace through his. "I love you so-so much." You giggle lightly, leaning forward to nuzzle your nose against his own. During the past couple months, you had gone from wishing you were dead, to being completely in love and wishing that you could stay alive longer than necessary, so you could spend a few more days in his arms.


	15. The Way It Used To Be

**Karkat Vantas**: Bruises and open wounds were the least of your problems as you woke up once again, knowing that you had lived the nightmare that you had experienced last night had you pulling your knees to your chest and resting your head on your knees. Things had gotten worse. Worse than you would have expected. Relapses and new bruises, cuts and burns were common occurrences around this household, and you could feel yourself slowly evaporating towards relapse yourself. That's where the line of broken promises came into view. Eridan had promised to atop drinking months ago, but once an addiction starts, you find it hard to stop. The look of pure self-loathing he holds for weeks after he finds a new bruise and or cut somewhere on your body sent you spiraling through an emotional rollercoaster of death, that once you got through one of the loops. The track just cuts off, sending you at a thousand miles per hour at the rock-hard cement. You had even grown antisocial, not coming to family gatherings or hanging out with friends. You guess that's just how it works though.

**Eridan Ampora**: The springs on your bed made it harder for you to get a proper sleep. You woke up with a pain in your back; groaning you sat up. The feeling you got when you know you've done something horrible pinged inside of you, another groan escaped your mouth. How could you be so stupid? You know you always hurt Karkat when you're under the influence. So why do you still do it? To forget, to fill up the emptiness that was left of you? God only knows, and it was killing you. You got up slowly, and headed to Karkat's room, lightly pushing on the door. "Kar..."

**Karkat Vantas**: You barely flinch when Eridan walks into the room, your eyes still glued on the wall as you lay on your side, your fingers bunched up in the loose fitting black t-shirt around your shoulders. The worst of the bruises you had already taken care of, using more foundation than normal to cover up the one on your collarbone and on your cheek. You hated what this was doing to you, you were becoming a whole new person, antisocial and scared to have contact with people anywhere but here. You lightly traced your finger over your hipbone as you blankly stared at the wall, your eyes unseeing as you thought about life and what a hell it had been to you lately.

**Eridan Ampora**: "Oh my god Kar..." You instantly went to his side, putting your hand on his waist trying to comfort him. To your fingers discovery, the bones that lay beneath were trying to poke war ut even more. Your face twisted in disappointment. How could you let that happen to Karkat? Why, would you let that happen to him.

**Karkat Vantas**: Your eyes don't leave the wall as you lean into Eridan's touch, a barely there smile gracing your lips. "What happened?" You question, rolling onto your side and wincing lightly as you elbowed yourself in the side, directly where one of the bruises was. Eridan's eyes were worried and saddened, so you resisted the urge to sigh. You weren't a fan of when people took sympathy in you even when they had a right to. It made you feel like shit. You smiled falsely and placed a hand over-top Eridan's. "Hey."

**Eridan Ampora**: As Karkat winced, a wave of guilt washed over you, a slight frown appearing on your face. "Are you okay?" you questioned with sympathy lacing the tone of your voice. Your fingers tracing his very visible bones. It was awful how skinny he was. "Do you want breakfast? I could cook you something if you want." You basically pleaded, knowing he needed to eat something.

**Karkat Vantas**: You shook your head softly, your half-lidded eyes making it seem as if you were tired, when in all honesty you weren't. "I'm alright, and no I'm fine, I'm not too terribly hungry." You sigh, lifting your arms behind your back, making sure that your shirt didn't rise up more than necessary, revealing the bruises that you hadn't bothered to cover. You smiled and were planning on pulling him on the bed beside you, but decided not to as you took his hand that was trailing across your stomach and laced your fingers through his. "Yeah, I should be fine."

**Eridan Ampora**: "Are you sure, it's always good to start a day with a good breakfast." You say with a slight smirk. "Come on, I'll make us something." Your lips lifted up at the corners, making you smile a bit. You squeezed his hand lightly, trying to encourage him to get up. He had to eat something, and if he wasn't going to, you were going to make him eat at least a tiny bit of it.

**Karkat Vantas**: "I thought I was the only one who knew how to cook around here." you chuckle, allowing him to hoist you up into standing position, giving a small yelp as it strained the muscles in your shoulder. You bit your lip and stepped away, rubbing your shoulder with a wince. "Jesus shit."

**Eridan Ampora**: "Of course not, I sort of know how to..." You say teasingly. Knowing that you did know how to cook well, you just wanted to surprise him. "Come on, you can wait on the couch; I don't want you falling asleep while I make you a _delicious _breakfast." You smirk a bit, grabbing his hand and leading him out the door and into the kitchen.

**Eridan Ampora**: "Shit, are you okay though, your shoulder... is it fine?"

**Karkat Vantas**: You nodded your head with a smile. "Of course." The smile on your face was fake, and you winced once more. Last nights attack had left you with more wounds than last time, including a sizable cut on your right shoulder, causing you the pain in your shoulder. You tried to hide a wince as Eridan smiled and settled you down on the couch, running a hand through your hair. But things like that were sometimes unavoidable.

**Eridan Ampora**: As you entered the kitchen, a whole bunch of thoughts swirling around your mind. Okay, what now. You got all of the stuff that you needed, turning on the stove and making some awesome bacon and eggs.

**Karkat Vantas**: You sighed and settled yourself down in the cushions. You knew that later you would have to tell Eridan about what had happened last night; even if you didn't want to. When Eridan drank and knew you were in pain he would constantly pester you about it until you spilled, and if you didn't tell him he would get a mixture of angry and irrational, and that scared the shit out of you. You hated seeing Eridan mad, and you hated seeing him so upset and clouded by self loathing, but you knew you would have to experience one of those two things tonight

**Eridan Ampora**: With a whole bunch of things on your mind, you couldn't concentrate on your cooking. It's been awhile since you've actually got in front of a stove, and it felt weird to you. But, you got used to it quick and within a few minutes or so, you got the breakfast ready and onto the plates. A side of eggs, bacon and hash-browns split into sections with perfect seasoning. A smile crossing your face you entered the living room with the plates in your hand, giving the one with a bigger proportion to Karkat.

**Karkat Vantas**: You smile and take the plate from Eridan, grimacing lightly at the fact of eating something. In all reality, there wasn't very much on your plate, but after going a few days without food, you actually didn't feel too excited to eat. You hesitantly picked up your fork and swiftly stabbed your egg, glaring at it for a second as if it was a sexual offender before you shoved the fork in your mouth, forcing yourself to chew and swallow despite how great the egg actually did taste. "If I would have cooked, I probably would've burned these to be honest." You laughed lightly, crossing your legs and wincing and deciding that would be a bad idea due to the soreness to your legs and thighs. You sighed, it was becoming physically impossible for you to do anything without hurting somewhere, but you were getting accustomed to it; and you were just fine.

**Eridan Ampora**: You glanced down at your plate, not wanting to look at the sufferer. It wouldn't make you feel any better. Chewing quietly at your bacon, liking how it tasted, but not feeling the satisfaction you felt after. You blinked back unnecessary tears, as you kept on looking down, your bangs sort of covering your face. "Are you sure you're okay?" you questioned, "I could get you some Advil after you finish your meal, or-or now." your awkward stutter coming through, you hated that. You just wanted to be caring and supportive, but you always do the opposite. And you couldn't do anything to do about it. You felt awful about that.

**Karkat Vantas**: "Why would I need Advil? I feel absolutely fine. I'm more worried about you." You state. Lie. You needed advil, and you needed some urgently. A headache was ripping through your brain, your shoulder hurt like hell and your legs felt like they were going to fucking die and drop into Satan's awaiting arms. But it was true that you were worried about Eridan, the solemn look on his face made you glance over more than once to see if he was alright. You must be tearing him apart by the way you've been acting lately, all cut off and dead to the world. You knew you should try to change it.. but you just couldn't. You were to paranoid to leave the house and return to a drunk Eridan or no Eridan at all and that alone was preventing you from going anywhere without him. You sighed internally and made a mental note to make plans with Kankri later today.

**Eridan Ampora**: "Nope, I'm getting you some Advil whether you like it or not." You put your plate on the side table and headed to your room where the Advil was hoarded. Taking the pills in your hand you got a glass of water and headed to Karkat's side again. Putting the glass on the table beside him and tossing the pills on the cushion. "Take them or else." You say pointing a finger at him, hoping that he will. Just to take the pain away. "Do you need to go to the doctor? I'll take you, you know. I just want you to not be in pain." Furrowing your eyebrows, you just wanted him to be happy. That's all.

**Karkat Vantas**: "Please don't, I'm fine." you sighed, taking the glass of water from his hands, taking the pills too and hesitantly taking them, placing the glass on the side-table. "I'm not in pain, I'm absolutely fine." you sigh, feeling absolutely no inclination to finishing the food on your plate. "Just sit down, you don't need to worry about me, I'm fine."

**Eridan Ampora**: "It's _very _obvious that you're in pain, Kar." You say with a frown appearing on your face. How could he deny it? You just wanted him to get better, but he wasn't letting you.

**Karkat Vantas**: "I don't really feel it... All it is is slightly numbing.. It doesn't bother me anymore." you frown and stare at your plate, pushing the hashbrowns across the ceramic plate. "Pain fades.. And that's what I'm letting it do.. I'm letting it fade." you sigh and bite your lip. You weren't making any sense whatsoever.

**Eridan Ampora**: "Are you positive...Kar don't start this again or I swear to fuckin' god." You say, an annoyed tone growing on you. Getting closer, you look him in the eye. "Kar..."

**Karkat Vantas**: You can feel the fear creeping on you as Eridan steps closer, your body going rigid and your fists clenching at your sides. "I'm sorry." you whisper, your gaze dropping to your lap. "I'm absolutely fine.. I mean I'm in pain but it's not something I can't deal with, I'm-" you cut yourself off as you began to ramble. "Please.. don't-"

**Eridan Ampora**: Without another word you start to lift up his shirt a bit, ignoring his rants of protest. Removing his shirt, revealing all of the bruises, scars and marks. A wave of emotions hitting you like a wrecking ball colliding with your body. Pushing your self up you tried to stop the tears, pulling your bangs back getting them away from your all of a sudden very sweaty forehead. Not saying anything you walked out of there, not sure on what to do, but to escape the guilt building up inside of you.

**Karkat Vantas**: You felt your heart drop into the very confines of your stomach as Eridan lifted your shirt up, your eyes as wide as saucers as you watched his emotions change from irritated to guilty, and you struggled to pull your shirt down as you stood up, debating whether or not to follow after Eridan, not wanting to anger him nor upset him, so after taking a deep breath and fixing your composure you jogged after him, barely managing to slam the door behind yourself as you dashed after him, despite the screams of protest from your legs.

**Eridan Ampora**: You look back and saw Karkat catching up to you, and you walk faster not wanting the guilt to suffocate you into a dark abyss. Blinking past tears, you pull your scarf over your nose, feeling its warmth. It helped; it felt like you were hidden from the world, and you free to cry all you want. You just needed to escape and you knew exactly where to go.

**_A/N; I'd really just like to make it clear that I'm not thouroughly educated on the disorders and situations in this, I haven't really experienced it personally; other than self-harm and anorexia, but the rest I am just beginning to read into so I can get better at writing it I guess? So if we're doing something wrong, please tell us!_**


	16. I Will Wait

**Karkat Vantas**: After a while you had to give up on catching up to him, but you never lost where he was. You were more than confused as you watched him enter a seemingly abandoned house, but you furrowed your eyebrows and continued, not bothering to knock as you entered, as you stepped through you had to gasp, it was a beautiful space, and the paintings on the walls were absolutely amazing, could Eridan have done this? You swallowed audibly before you called his name, hearing your voice echo

**Eridan Ampora**: You took place at your regular spot. It's been a long time, actually, but it felt like it was just yesterday when you were last here. Like a familiar friend. You got out your paint brushes and furiously started painting, stroking the vivid colours across the white canvas. Doing whatever your mind desired. When you heard Karkat's voice echo around you, you swore under your breath and stopped abruptly. Looking behind you, seeing the figure of him standing there.

**Karkat Vantas**: Your mouth was dropped open in awe, a light smile grazing the corners of your lips. You always suspected Eridan to be a good painter due to how passionate he really was about it, but you had no clue he was _this _good. Your eyes didn't avert to Eridan as you stepped into the room, immediately walking over to one of the brighter canvases, your fingers reached out as if to touch it, before you took a moment to realize what was really in the picture, you took note of the two men walking along the beachside, holding hands and smiling before your excitement rose. "Is this us?"

**Eridan Ampora**: "Uh... maybe." You say hesitantly, your face turning bright red. You went back to your work, your redness fading. This painting wasn't of Karkat, for once, but of- well you didn't know. It was a mystery of what you were painting this time. Like it always was, always a mystery. But, you always had an idea in your mind what you wanted to do.

**Karkat Vantas**: You laugh softly, that was the most fucking adorable thing you had seen in a long time, you loved how passionate Eridan was about his talent.. Maybe you should start singing some more? No, you couldn't do that, you were too out of practice. With a smile on your face you walked towards Eridan, bending down and wrapping your arms around his waist as you rested your chin on his shoulder. "Well, I think it's really fucking cute." you giggle, pressing a soft kiss to his cheek. "And.. I hate to break the moment but I'm sorry, I guess I should be telling you more about whats been done than I have been, but.. It's really hard. I'm sure you would feel the same way if you were in my position."

**Eridan Ampora**: You sighed slightly, relaxing a little bit when you felt his arms wrap around you, what comfort. When you started painting, you couldn't stop. "I understand, I should be the one sorry. I'm the one who keeps fucking up all of the time." You say shaking your head a little, still concentrating on the colour scheme ahead of you. "So, I'm sorry. Okay?"

**Karkat Vantas**: "Everybody makes mistakes Eridan, and I have no problem with forgiving them. Trust me, I've fucked up plenty in our relationship. It's not really like you're completely at fault here, whatever's inclining you to drink is also part of the problem, but you also could find other ways to cope." You smiled and watched as Eridan focused so serenely on his work. "I love you, and I can see that you're busy right now, so I'm going to go look around. But I'll have you know; once you're finished we're spending the rest of the day together, Okay?"

**Eridan Ampora**: "Alright," You say with a smile, but hesitated a bit, a pained look on your face, "Just... don't, go into that back room, it's uh really messy and has a lot of sharp objects lying around, I wouldn't recommend it." You said it all too quickly, shifting your eyes to the door and back. Continuing to stroke the canvas with a bright red, almost like a candy red.

**Karkat Vantas**: You nodded, even though it went unseen. You've dealt with a little mess before, so it wouldn't matter if you went in or not, but you had a strong need to go against Eridan's wishes. As you searched through the dusty rooms, you found your body becoming weaker and weaker, as you grew more tired. You just managed to stumble back to where Eridan was painting, grasping onto the door frame for dear life. "E-Eridan-"

**Eridan Ampora**: "Yeah- Oh my god, Kar... shit." You got up and went to his side immediately. Putting your arms around his waist, supporting his weight on you. You swore under your breath a couple of times leading him to an aged couch off in the corner. "You're going to be okay Kar..."

**Karkat Vantas**: You felt as if your lungs were collapsing on yourself, even though you knew your lungs were not the cause of the problem. You knew exactly what the reason was, and you felt disgusted with yourself. You were worrying Eridan because you were too fucking pathetic to eat something, trying to achieve some pointless goal. "I'm so fucking sorry." you managed to whisper before you drifted off, your whole body going numb.

**Eridan Ampora**: "No.." You say, barely above a whisper. You didn't think he would pass out that quick. Slipping your arms around him you hoist him up, just like a baby. He was lighter than usual. Walking fast, you made it to your house, struggling to open the door but managing. You placed him in his bed, tucking him in. A wave of panic washing over you, you stayed by his side on the bed, not sure what to do. You just wanted him to be okay.

**Karkat Vantas**: Your eyes fluttered open suddenly, your weak state of mind causing you to stare at the ceiling for longer than necessary. You blinked furiously and a groan escaped your lips, good lord were you fucking tired. You struggled to pull yourself into a sitting position, after a few moments giving up completely and staring into space. You could feel the smoothing of Eridan's thumb over your hand and you glanced over, your eyebrows furrowing. "Eri...? What happened?"

**Eridan Ampora**: "You passed out..." That was the only thing that you could say, the burning desire to ask him what was wrong lingering in your mind. You refused to do it, knowing he needed to get up, and rest a little bit before you even start to drill him with questions.

**Karkat Vantas**: You sighed heavily, sinking into the cushions of your bed. "Shit.. Ah." You ran a hand through your thoroughly fucked up hair. "Do you think you could grab my laptop from the living-room?" You questioned, finally managing to pull yourself into a sitting position, still feeling weak. You needed Kankri to come over, he was with you last time this happened and to say the least, you needed him.

**Eridan Ampora**: "Alright..." You mumble, getting up and heading to the kitchen where his laptop usually was. Retrieving it, you head back to his side putting the laptop on his lap. With a sigh you plop back down on the bed, resting your head on the wall. "If you want to be alone I will leave so you can do whatever you want on that laptop...or what ever you need." You were making no sense mumbling on and on like that.

**Karkat Vantas**: "No, you're going to come here and sit beside me, I'm just calling Kankri." you state, pulling him beside you, leaning against him slightly. You flipped open your laptop and headed to the Skype application, waiting for it to load as you hummed softly to yourself and when it finally loaded you smiled, clicking the call button under Kankri's username. "Hello Karkat, I didn't really expect you to call me- oh god you look pale!" You sigh as Kankri's eyes widen slightly. "Oh, Karkat please tell me you've been eating!" You frowned and bit your lip, wrapping a singular arm around your waist as you averted your eyes from Kankri's face upon your screen. "I hope neither you or Eridan mind, but if it wouldn't offend I'd like to come over, I can see that we might need to talk." you nodded your head, a light but weak smile on your lips. "I'd like that."

**Eridan Amporna**: You put on a fake smile, hoping Kankri wouldn't be able to see you. Even if the smile wasn't at all fake, seeing Karkat talking with Kankri could make your day any day. Just seeing his joy of seeing his brother again was just priceless. It reminded you, that you needed to talk to your brother some time soon.

**Karkat Vantas**: When Eridan got up to open the door for Kankri you leant over the side of your bed, reaching under and pulling out your thoroughly used notebook from underneath, resting it on your lap as you pulled the pencil from the spine, flipping open to a new page and jotting down a few lines. You pushed the notebook down by your feet when Kankri walked in, his arms crossed over his chest. "Karkat, for somebody as incredibly intelligent as you are, you are extremely stubborn." You couldn't help but roll your eyes at his words, knowing that he was correct. "Yeah, I know I am." You sigh, resting your head against your headboard. "Eridan told me you collapsed again, what happened?" You felt hesitant to respond as Eridan settled himself on the bed beside you and you drop your gaze to your lap. "I um.. I hadn't eaten in a few days and I ended up running a few blocks after barely touching my breakfast, and as I was looking around I felt myself getting weaker and weaker and I guess I just collapsed? I don't really remember." You sigh and bury your fingers in your hair, sighing inwardly. You really didn't like talking about this with Eridan present.

**Eridan Amporna**: When he spoke those words you were on shock. You should've known better, how stupid were you. "Oh my god, Kar." You just wanted to apologize over and over again, and hold him against you and tell him how deeply sorry you were. If you only knew.

**Karkat Vantas**: "I thought you were over that." Kankri stated bluntly, leaning his back up against the wall. "I thought I was too, but you know. Things do change and.. yeah." You sighed, unable to speak fluent english at the moment. "Can you walk?" Kankri asked, stepping forward, his hands sliding onto his hips. "I don't think so? I'm still sorta weak.." You sighed, once again as watched cautiously as Kankri walked towards you, his look of seriousness almost scaring you. You gasped when he reached down and pulled your shirt up, hearing his almost directly following gasp and you fluttered your eyes closed. Shit.

**Karkat Vantas** joined the chat 3 hours ago

**Eridan Amporna**: Shit. You looked away, not wanting to look at either of them at the moment. Lingering your gaze to the opposite wall, being an over emotional little shit, blinking the tears back. God damn it, why did he have to look there.

**Karkat Vantas**: You sighed and trailed your hand across the blanket, resting it reassuringly overtop Eridan's. Kankri gave you a look and raised his eyebrow, you just shook your head and held up your finger to signal for later. "Have you told him about why this started in the first place." you shook your head, giving him a warning glare. "Well, when Karkat was around sixteen years old, the time our fathers abuse was intense and persistent he resorted on taking out the things our father said on himself. After he began to point out the fact that Karkat was the biggest out of all of us, Karkat developed both anorexia and bulimia and it would seem as if he's relapsed." Kankri wrapped one arm around his own waist, causing Karkat's glare to intensify. "That's enough, Kan." You hissed under your breath. "If you've come here to point out how weak I am I would really appreciate you not doing that or simply leaving, please. I already feel like shit for relapsing in the first place." you sigh, your angry glaring turning to a soft pleading.

**Karkat Vantas**: "Karkat, your puppy eyes are not going to work on me. I've been living with you for far to long to fall for such things. He's your boyfriend and if you love him as much as you say you do, I would have expected you to tell him already." Kankri's smirk caused your eyes to widen and you dropped your gaze. Alas, he was right.

**Eridan Amporna**: Your emotions went to sad to angry in 1.0 seconds. Practically leaping off of the bed, you stood there with your fists balled by your sides, you face probably turning red. "You need to shut your mouth there buddy," you started, your body and voice shaking. "Kar doesn't need to tell me shit, unless he really needs to." You walked up to him, jabbing your finger on his chest multiple of times, "Stop patronizing him and just... _shut up _for once." You push him slightly not wanting to get too physical.

**Karkat Vantas**: You gasp as Eridan presses his finger against Kankri's chest, Kankri's composure barely falling as you struggled forward, standing up and pulling Eridan backwards as you nearly trip over your own feet, grabbing onto your beds railing for support as your knees struggled to hold the little weight you contained. "The both of you, just stop." your body began to shake as you struggled upright. "Maybe having you here was a bad idea, Kankri. I think you should leave." you clutched lightly onto Eridan's arm as you slipped down onto your bed, your breathing all over the fucking place. "But Kar-" "Leave!" as you heard the door close behind him you slid down to the floor, pulling your knees up to your chest as you let out a cough to hide the sob you were retaining. Jesus Christ you did not need this right now.

**Eridan Amporna**: After he left, you turned back to Karkat. "I-I'm so sorry Kar." You say, fumbling with your words. Awkwardly standing there, not sure on what to do.

**Karkat Vantas**: "No, it's not your fault. Kankri just does that sometimes, you'd think 20 years of living with him would make me used to it. But noooooo." you drag the word out and sigh, resting your head in your hands. "Come here." you moan after a few seconds, holding your arms out for a hug as you sat on the floor.

**Eridan Amporna**: You smiled lightly, dragging yourself down beside Karkat, leaning against him a bit and wrapping your arm around. "I should've known better... I never knew- and ugh." You sighed giving up with words. You just wanted to feel the embrace of Karkat.

**Karkat Vantas**: You smiled slightly and rested your head against Eridan's chest, feeling the rise and fall of his chest against your cheek. "No you didn't know because I didn't tell you, and I didn't tell you because I was embarassed? Something along those lines." You sigh, shrugging your shoulders as you wrapped your arms around his torso

**Karkat Vantas**: "None of this was your fault, I was the one at fault here, I wasn't eating and yeah." you frowned, fluttering your eyes closed so you didn't have to look at him. You were just a bucket of fucking sunshine.

Eridan Ampora: "I still feel bad about it all..." You say with a sigh, hugging him a bit more. God you loved hugging him. You kissed his cheek lightly. "And that won't make me stop telling you that I'm sorry, because you never know when you're too late for it..."

Karkat Vantas: "Valid point." You smiled, leaning against him with a light smile gracing your lips. "I really love you, you know that?" You question, a grin breaking out across your lips as you ended up sliding yourself onto his lap, resting your face in the crook of his neck, just enjoying the comfort he was bringing you. God, you would have to speak to Kankri tomorrow, even though you weren't to keen on doing such, you needed to apologize and get apologized to.

Eridan Ampora: "Not as much as I love you." A tear slid down your cheek, but you quickly swiped at it, hoping Karkat didn't see.

Karkat Vantas: "That is very debatable." you smile, pressing a soft kiss to Eridan's neck, reaching up to tangle your fingers in Eridan's hair, with a sigh you repositioned yourself, noticing the redness of Eridan's eyes but not making a big deal about it as you leant down and pressed a small kiss to his nose, then to his forehead, your cheeks heating up in the process before you wrap your arms around his shoulders and hug him once again. Enjoying his presence.


	17. Thinking Of You

Eridan Ampora The next day, you both woke up on his bed. Forgetting how you even got there, but oh well. You got up and went to make you and Kar coffee. Before you did that, you wanted to check your phone that you barely use anymore. Twenty missed calls from Cronus. Shit. You would call him later today, you're surprised he hasn't come to your house yet. You checked the time. Shit. It was Karkat's Birthday today. You practically ran out of the house with your phone in hand.

Karkat Vantas: You woke up with extreme discomfort in the back of you head and you screwed with the hair there for a whiile to distract yourself before you stood up, still feeling extremely weak. With a light call of Eridan's name you walk down the hallway, using the wall as a support beam as you scoured the house for him, worry sparking in the pit of your chest when you couldn't find him anywhere. Please be doing okay, Eridan

Eridan Ampora: You should've texted or called Kar telling him that you were heading out for a bit, but you had no time apparently. As you practically jogged down the sidewalk to where your paintings were held. Selecting the specific painting from the back room you banned Karkat in going into. Tucking it under your arm, you ran out of the door again. Ok, now to get part two of his gift. Making your way down the street, you got to your desired location and opened the door, hearing the little ringing of the bell. The merchant's voice booming from the counter, "Hello there lad, how my I help you?" You hesitated a bit stepping up to the counter. "I'm here to get a ring..." "Hm? For your little girlfriend, right?" You shook your head a bit, "Not quite, it's for my boyfriend." You say with an awkward chuckle at the end. His laugh echoed across the small store. "Of course! I know the right ring for him." He pulled out an incredible ring with five little diamonds in the middle. A colour pattern of red and purple. "That's beautiful, how much is it?" "Like, 20 000 dollars mate." You gaped at the price, immediately closing your mouth. "Okay, I can pay that." He sputtered out another laugh. "Alright!" When you paid for the ring you put it in a small bag. Once you got back, with the painting and bag in tow you called out for Kar, "I'm back Kar."

Karkat Vantas: You let out a harsh breath of relief when you heard Eridan's voice call out, and a light smile crossed your lips. "I'm in the kitchen!" you call back, sipping on your tea happily. You were listening to some stupid little love song from your laptop as you chewed slowly on a granola bar, not wanting to dive headfirst into eating big meals immediately. You furrowed your eyebrows when Eridan walked into the room, a canvas tucked tightly under his arms. "Where'd you get off to?" you question, a teasing tone to your voice.

Eridan Amporaa: "Oh, you know, went to the museum and stole a painting." You say with the same teasing tone he used. "Well, that's not true, but in don't know if this is a great spot to give this to you, but, happy birthday Kar." You pulled the painting from under your arm and towards him. "Hope you like it." You say with a slight smile spreading across your face as your face was probably burning a bright red.

**Karkat Vantas**: You take the painting in your hands and a gasp escapes your mouth, your finger trails lightly over the fine painted lines as your smile grew. It was absolutely stunning, it was of you and Eridan, Eridan leaning over you and placing a flower-crown. It was drawn with such intricate lines and with exquisite realism that made it seem like a photograph. Your smile grew as you placed it on the table in front of you, you stood up, still slightly wobbly and threw your arms around Eridan, giggling lightly as you pressed a kiss to his lips. "Wow.. I love it.. Thank-you."

**Eridan Ampora**: "You're welcome, I lo-" you were interrupted by another pair of arms wrapping around you both. "Brother!" Of course it was Cronus, "Brother no!"

**Karkat Vantas**: "Well, of course you can join us Cronus!" you chuckle sarcastically as he squeezed the both of you tighter against him. "It's nice to feel welcome, nice to see you baby bro'" you can basically feel Eridan eyes rolling as he breaks from the hug. You winked at Eridan before you were scooped into another hug from Cronus, feeling your face pressed up against his chest, the scent of his Obsession cologne and cigarettes filling your senses. "Happy birthday Kar, I brought you a lil' somthin'" Cronus broke the hug and you rolled your eyes. "Okay how many people know it's my birthday?" You question, tapping your foot on the tile of your kitchen. "It's a mystery, kid!" Cronus laughed as he came back into the room, sporting a large sized ice-cream cake. "Are you shitting me."

**Eridan Ampora**: "It really is a mystery." You say, shrugging your shoulders. A smile creeping onto your face. "Wait, woah. You brought a CAKE?" Your eyebrows shot up in surprise. Damn, your brother knew what was up. "Jesus shit Cro." You shook your head, with an amused look plastered on your face.

**Karkat Vantas**: "How did you even know it was my birthday?" you ask as Cronus slid the cake into the freezer. "I have my ways, kid." he sent a joking wink your way and you smiled softly. "Well thanks, but there's no way I'm going to finish that whole damn cake." you chuckle, watching as he leant against the cupboard. "Well, you know, you might be able to with a lil' help." you furrowed your eyebrows in confusion. "I swear to god Cronus, what have you planned."

**Karkat Vantas**: As Cronus was about to speak, he got cut off to the sound of a knock at the door, and you raised an eyebrow, passing both Eridan and Cronus as you reached the door, pulling it open hesitantly. You didn't have time to react before you found yourself pummeling towards the floor, your weak body protesting as two figures of your sisters fell on top of you, and a yelp of pain escaping your lips when Nepeta's nails dug into your shoulder, where a offending cut resided.

**Eridan Ampora**: The thud and pile of bodies on the floor got your attention pretty quick. "H-hey, careful!" You and Cronus looked over in panic. God damn it. Those girls could be so rowdy at times. You rushed over, and crouched down beside Karkat, by now the girls have gotten off of him. "Shit, are you okay?"

**Karkat Vantas**: "Aaah." you groan, crossing your arms over your chest with a pout across your lips. "That really hurt!" you exclaimed, pointing an offending finger in their direction. "I'm fine." you smile, winking at Eridan as you rolled your shoulder, ignoring the throbbing pain. The front door was still ajar and you cocked your head to peer out, nearly having a heart-attack as you scrambled to your feet a yelped "D-Dad!" escaping your throat as you stood up and dashed towards him, meeting him halfway and throwing your arms around his torso. "Wow, fifteen and still acting like a child." you felt your heart plummet when those words escaped his mouth, he still thought you were that young. "W-well, you know, I guess maturity hasn't hit me yet." you sigh, struggling to keep a straight composure as you bit your lip. This was a severe case, wasn't it.

**Eridan Ampora**: You plastered a fake smile on, making sure your composure didn't crumble like a pastry. His dad thought he was that young. Cronus came up behind you and nudged you a bit, "I thought he was older than you man?" He whispered in your ear, so that only you could hear. You shook your head slightly, "I'll tell you later, Cro." You whispered back. You smiled back up at Mr. Vantas, "Hello." You really didn't know what else to say.

**Karkat Vantas**: You tap your foot against the tile, trying to distract yourself from the conversation that your dad was having with Eridan. You felt as if you were going to break down at any moment, your fists clenched at your side

**Karkat Vantas**: You could practically feel the sympathetic stares of your sister and you felt more than upset, you didn't know what to do so you you excused yourself, crossing one arm over your stomach as you headed to the bathroom, a sullen expression on your face. You found yourself happy that you had hidden one of your blades under the sink, and you promised yourself one. Only one to feel alive.

**Eridan Ampora**: "Excuse me, I need to do a thing." You excuse yourself from your conversation with the Vantas family and head into the hallway, waiting outside the bathroom for Karkat. He did it again, and you knew he did. You could see it in the look of his eyes when he left. The strong urge to do it again lingered in them. You leant against the wall, crossing your arms. The look of disappoint written all over your face. How could he have stooped so low. But, you couldn't blame him, not at all.

**Karkat Vantas**: With a shaky breath you manage to wrap your wrist with a bandage, making sure it wouldn't show from underneath your long sleeved shirt. You hid your blade and sighed, the weakness not fading from your body. You felt like you were going to burst into tears as you walked out and caught a glimpse of the pure disappointment in his facial features and you didn't try to hug him, hoping he could bring you some amount of comfort, you just stood there, at loss of words.

**Eridan Ampora**: "Why?" you whispered, your eyebrows knitted together. You were in complete shock. He did, he really did do it. Shaking your head in disapproval, you basically slumped into him wrapping your arms around him. He needed comfort, and so did you.

**Karkat Vantas**: You buried your face against him, loosely tangling your arms around his torso. "I-I just... He doesn't remember anything... Six years of my existing life that he doesn't remember.. Six years of my Dad I'll never get back.. Sure he was an asshole most of my life.. But no matter what you love your parents.. You don't have to like them, or the way they treat you but love isn't just something you let go when something is done wrong. I want my asshole Dad back so I don't have to pretend I'm something I want to be, but something I'm not when he's around. I-I wish my mom was back so my dad never resorted to alcohol as a pain reliever to help him cope with her absence. I want my childhood back." you all but sob, your fingers tangling in his shirt as you let the tears flow, not giving a shit about yojr awaiting family.

**Eridan Ampora**: "I know, Kar. But you can't change it, things happen for a reason nobody really knows." You knew you had to do it now. Come on ma you had to do it. It was now or never. You grabbed the small shaped box out of your back pocket leaving it behind your back, "Just listen to me, okay." You took a shaky breath before you said anything else. Nervous as hell, "I can't promise that dark clouds will never hover over our lives, or that the future will bring us many rainbows. I can't promise you that tomorrow will be perfect or that life will be easy. I can promise you my ever lasting devotion, my loyalty, my respect and my unconditional love for a life time. I can promise that I'll always be here for you, to listen and to hold your hand, and always do my best to make you happy, and make you feel loved. I promise you." You finally took the box and held it in front of him, not bothering to get on one knee, due to the small hallway. Lifting the lid to reveal the expensive ring you got just for him. "Now, will you promise to be mine?" You say with a wide smile spreading across your face.

**Karkat Vantas**: You lifted your hand to cover your mouth, your eyes wide as saucer plates as you stared into his eyes, shifting your gaze from his eyes to the box in his hands. Holy fucking shit. Words were not available apparently and you began to nod your head, excited tears forming in your eyes as your body trembled, you couldn't believe this was happening. You removed your hand and a grin formed across your lips as you grabbed his face with your hands and kissed him with all the passion you could.


	18. A Million Different Ways

**Karkat Vantas**: You wipe your eyes happily as Eridan slips the ring on your finger, pressing a light kiss to your knuckles with a smile across his lips. "Nepeta, Meulin!" you called your sisters as you basically bounced in your seat, waiting for a response from your sisters and your smile grew when the two of them stepped out together with near identical confused looks. "Nepeta, remember that green dress both of you guys wanted so badly?" you question, causing Nepeta to squeal happily and nod, Muelin following suit. "Well as soon as possible I want you girls to go out and buy them." Muelin cocked her head in confusion. "But Karkitty, we have no real reason to get them, our prom has already passed." you watched as Nepeta's eyes trailed down your arm, catching sight of the glistening ring on your finger. And you sure there was no way to protect your eardrums from the trauma as she attacked both you and Eridan in a hug.

**Eridan Amporaa**: "Holy shit, Nep. Calm down." You chuckle a bit, embracing the impact of her small body crashing onto you both. For her size, it hurt only a little bit.

**Karkat Vantas**: You smile widely and sling your arm around her, pulling her against you and away from Eridan as Meulin attacked him with her own body. Wow, your sisters had grown so attached to Eridan over the past few months, so they were going to be having a field day with this whole situation. Your smile grew as Cronus poked a curious head around the corner, his eyebrows raised as you stood confused at the situation in front of his eyes. "So, can I ask what's goin' on here or?" he questioned, leaning against the wall, still oblivious. With a smile you lifted up your hand and showed off the glistening ring, and as nonchalantly as possible, the unlit cigarette fell from his lips and to the floor as he gasped and a grin filed over his lips. "So, my baby brother scored himself a fiancé, eh?"

**Eridan Amporaa**: "Maaaaybe." You say with a smirk, but Mr. Vantas' concerning voice made it all stop, "He's only fifteen, what do you mean, fiancé?" He questioned. You didn't know how to reply, so you sat there with Meulin on your lap, speechless. Uh-oh.

**Karkat Vantas**: "D-Dad." you sigh, letting your arms fall loose from Nepeta's grip as you walked past them and into your bedroom, digging around for something in the trunk in front of your bed, sighing in relief as you found the specific photo album that you were looking for. You ignored the confused looks that you gathered from Cronus and the rest of your family as you walked to your Dad's side, taking note of the anger in his eyes. You flipped open to the page you were looking for, producing a collection of photos from your fifteenth birthday. "Dad, this was from my fifteenth birthday." you sighed when his eyes widened and he examined the pictures. "That was six years ago." you frown, blinking back tears as you flip through the pictures of your birthday, leading up to your twenty-first. "I'm not fifteen anymore."

**Karkat Vantas**: "B-but that's not possible! This is a joke, a very sick joke!" he exclaimed, his eyes darting between yours, and your sisters. You stepped forward with a sigh, snapping the photo-album shut as you lifted a hand to his, squeezing it tightly. "Today it's my 22nd birthday, that was six years ago Dad. You've lost a lot of your memory." you sighed, your eyes beginning to sting. "No, that can't be possible, you were just fifteen yesterday!" you shook your head and your eyes widened once again as Kankri stepped through the doors, a confused look across your face. "I'm 22 and as of today, I'm engaged to Eridan Ampora, the man who you met not too long ago. We're all happy, and you should be too. I know that this is a lot to take in right now, but I'm still the same person I was when I was fifteen, nothing has changed other than my age and now possibly my last name." you smirked lightly as a small smile spread across his lips. "Now, I think what we all should do is have some cake and have a good time, it is my birthday after all." you smiled, managing to summon a laugh out of your confused Dad. You sighed and nodded your head, smiling softly despite the urge you had to break into tears. You avoided the gaze of everyone as you headed to the kitchen, rubbing your eyes furiously. Well, this day was like an emotional roller coaster.


	19. Fix You

**Eridan Amporaa**: "I'll go help Kar..." You sighed following after your obviously distressed fiancé. Your arms wrapped around him from behind, almost like it was mandatory. "Kar... Are you okay?"

**Karkat Vantas**: You shake your head and lean back against Eridan, biting your lip forcefully enough to pierce your skin. You attempted to keep the shaking of your body to a minimum as you sighed shakily. You shook your head once again before you turned around in his grip and threw your arms around his waist, struggling to keep your tears inside as you listened to the four retreating sets of footsteps. "Fuck." you whisper, your voice wobbly as you rest your face against Eridan's shoulder.

**Eridan Amporaa**: You weren't the best at comforting people when they needed it the most, and it broke you. The thought of not being able to make the person you loved the most feel better, literally _broke_you. What else were you supposed to do? Shoosh him and pap his face till he was all better? No, that was absurd. You just hugged. Hugged him as tight as you could,but not to a point it suffocated him. Just tenderly embracing him, tightly.

**Karkat Vantas**: Your fingers hung loosely around Eridan's neck as he held you tightly against his built frame. Your body had not ceased its shaking and all you wanted to do was curl up in a hole and die, or disappear. Either of which would suffice. "I'm sorry, I'm supposed to be happy today, but things just aren't fucking working for me right now." You sigh, pilling away slightly enough to still be in his embrace as you wiped a tear that had fallen from your eye and you sniffled lightly before leaning into him once again, needing his comforting hold around your body.

**Eridan Amporaa**: "I understand, it's okay to showcase your emotions." You sighed, "Maybe we should get the cake. Cake is good for the soul." You chuckled slightly, releasing your grip on him and retrieving the cake from the fridge. "Alright, mind helping me out here?" You got a decent sized knife and started to _attempt_ to cut the cake.

**Karkat Vantas**: Eridan's attempt at cutting the cake had you clutching at your stomach as strangled laughter escaped your lips. You grasped the countertop as Eridan swore once again, the slice of cake falling to the floor at your feet, causing a shrill screech of laughter escape you. And Eridan was supposed to be a fucking cook. You shook your head as tears of laughter streamed down your cheeks and you staggered away slightly, making your way towards the living room as you continued to laugh. "Um, ah. Eridan could use a lil' help if anyone's up to it." You chuckle, biting back a laugh.

Eridan Amporaa: Fucking cake. You practically growl at the cake as you stab it once more. Swearing under your breath. How fucking hard was it to cut a cake? You try to lash out at it again until a very amused voice came from behind you. "Y'all need help little man, looks like you're trying to murder someone." Cronus peaked around the corner, a wide smile plastered on his face along with a light laugh. You roll your eyes, "Fine..."

Karkat Vantas: Yes, Cronus was right. It looked as if Eridan was pulling a full blown fucking homicide on the innocent cake. You let another strangled laugh escape you before you clamped a hand over your mouth. "oh my fucking god." you chuckle before wrapping your arms around your now pain filled stomach. You begin to laugh once again as you stumble against Eridan, shaking in silent laughter as you threw your arms around him, grasping his shirt in your hands. "Ow, fuck. Shit, my stomach." you laugh, removing your arms from him and wrapping them around your torso. Jesus shit.

**Eridan Amporaa**: "It's not that funny, Kar." You stifled a laugh out of yourself. Okay maybe it was funny. You handed Cronus the knife. "Alright cake master, do your magic."

**Karkat Vantas**: You finally managed to get your laughter under control as Cronus sliced the cake into reasonable portions. You and Eridan helped you pass out the slices of cake before you settled on the couch at Eridan's side, happily eating the cake, aware of the looks that Kankri kept passing towards you and you shrugged them off, focusing on the conversation around you. Soon after you all finished your cake, you helped Eridan collect the dishes before it came time for everybody to leave. You got congratulate hugs from everybody and you couldn't wipe the smile off of your face. When Kankri swept you into his arms you smiled happily, hugging him back tightly. "I'm so sorry Karkat, I said some very unnecessary things earlier and I am going to try to make amends. Please Skype me later." you nodded and pulled away from the hug, more than willing to patch things up.

**Eridan Amporaa**: As your guests left, you let out a huge sigh of relief. Finally some piece and quiet, even if it was nice to see family once in a while. You sprawled out onto the couch, stretching yourself out, hearing your back crack slightly.

**Karkat Vantas**: You struggled to find a spot that wouldn't involve pushing Eridan out of his zone of comfort as you settled yourself into the cushions beside him, settling your face against his shoulder. "Well, I'd have to say that this has been one of the best days of my life." You smile, twirling the ring around your finger as you examined the shimmering stones and the glistening gold. "You've officially made me the happiest man alive."

**Eridan Amporaa**: "You've always made me the happiest man alive, but thank you, it means a lot knowing that I have made you happy." You say with a light chuckle, wrapping an arm around him. All of a sudden, you hear Party In The USA play in the distance. You and Kar look at each other, puzzled. Then you realized, it was your phone. You really needed to change your ringtone. Getting up quickly you rushed to where your phone as located. Picking it up, you checked the Caller ID; It was Cro. What would he want now? You pressed the talk button, "Yeah?" His tone of voice sounded almost anxious, but you couldn't tell. "Eridan, you won't believe what dad has been hiding from you."Your face was in shock when you heard Cro mention your dad, "W-what?" "Man, I should've waited until tomorrow to tell ya, but you got a lot of money man, it was in the will for mom." You grasped the counter so you wouldn't fall over. "W-what the hell, that must be all w-wrong." You said in disbelief, this can't be happening. "It was a mistake calling you right now, but maybe we can talk about it tomorrow?" "I'm busy tomorrow-w!" Your voice shook with anger, "How are you busy tomorrow? It's not like you got a date with someone, that's oh so urgent." "I can't believ-ve it! How-w do you not remember, I'm v-vistin' Fef you incoherent douche-bag!"

**Karkat Vantas**: Fef? Did he mean Feferi? Feferi Peixes? You knew it was wrong, but you couldn't help but overhear the conversation that was going on in the kitchen. You didn't know what was going on in that conversation, but Eridan's sudden anger had you standing up and slowly approaching your way to Eridan's side, placing a hand on his shoulder from behind in some reassuring act of kindness. The sadness that was in Eridan's eyes was unmistakable, and you cocked an eyebrow in worry. Wasn't going to see Fef a good thing? She was an amazing girl and she had been one of your childish friends until you moved, after that she never responded to your calls or texts and you truly believed that she hated you and never wanted to speak to you again. Your fingers traced Eridan's back as your thoughts wound back to your memories with Fef, and you wondered if you might be able to go with Eridan tomorrow. It would be nice to see her again.

**Eridan Amporaa**: You relaxed a bit at Karkat's touch, breathing in, and breathing out deeply. "Wow there, don't need to be like that, I'm just trying to help out here. And I do know about Fef. I'm sorry." His voice from the other line sounded repulsed but also saddened. "Ah fuck, I'm sorry, I should know-w not to get ov-verly angered." A tear slipped down your cheek, and Cronus's voice made you cry even harder, "She was my sister too, and it hurts me probably as much as it hurts you." Your anger quickly boiled up, "But w-were you there! You w-weren't! Do you know-w how-w much hate I'v-ve put myself through, and how-w much hate ev-veryone has put on me! No. No you hav-ven't. So no, you do not ev-ven know-w how-w much pain I'm in for it-" You heard a quiet I'm sorry on the other line as the call ended. Leaving yourself in a puddle of tears.

**Karkat Vantas**: Feferi was Eridan's sister? What happened between them? What was Eridan talking about? Your eyes widened as you threw your arms around Eridan, millions of questions running through your mind as you held him close, ignoring the growing wet spot on your shoulder as you did your best at comforting him, but you had always sucked at the whole comforting business. "Eridan, what happened?" you whispered, running your fingers through his perfectly styled hair as he cried. Oh god, what was going on?

**Eridan Amporaa**: "C-cro phoned, shit happened. Somethin' about my dad." You sobbed into his shirt, "Fef..." You couldn't say anything else as you cried your eyes out. Those sobs making you not say anything. Flash backs from the accident flashed before you. The big truck coming into view, too quickly, the impact and all of the blood. You sobbed even more. How could you forget. Of course you couldn't, never had, and probably never will forget. Oh god. Why did it have to happen.

**Karkat Vantas**: You decided that it would be best if you led Eridan to the couch, so that's what you did. You forced him into sitting down and you sat beside him, kissing away his tears one by one. It would be incredibly rude to ask for more information on the matter at the standing moment, so you ran your fingers through his hair, wiping away his tears before sliding onto his lap, continuing your cycle as you pressed soft kisses to every available area on his face. "It's alright Eridan, you're alright." you whispered pressing your forehead against his.

**Eridan Amporaa**: "Is it really; is it really okay?"You asked, shakily. You tried to stop crying but you couldn't. The tears came streaming down your face. When you loose something you can't replace, it was hard not to be in a stable condition. It's been years, and you still can't cope with the fact that she was gone. You just wanted it to be all one twisted dream and for it not to be true. Just shrivel away into nothing. That would be nice.

**Karkat Vantas**: "Yes, it's going to be absolutely fine. I'm here with you every step of the way, Eridan. And I know that you may think sometimes that I don't listen to you, or that you don't want to bother me with your problems, but I'm always here to listen to you, like you are for me. You're safe in my arms, and you always will be. Please, I hate seeing you in pain like this. I love you so much and it hurts to see you in this condition." You sigh, your forehead still pressed against the shaky Eridan's as you continued to kiss away his tears, your hands tangled in his soft hair that was so much like a puppy's. "I'll always be here for you, no matter the circumstance."

**Karkat Vantas**: Everything you did couldn't bring a end to the tears falling down Eridan's cheeks, and soon enough you found yourself humming a song you had written for Eridan a long time back, and after brushing the hair out of his face and backing up enough so your voice could be heard no matter how quiet you sang, you began reciting the lyrics. "Come up to meet you, tell you I'm sorry. You don't know how lovely you are. I had to find you, tell you I need you. Tell you I'll set you apart." You focused on keeping your voice straight, pushing the nervousness to the side. This was the first time you had sang in front of Eridan in your whole time knowing him, and you fought to keep a straight face before you continued. "Tell me your secrets and ask me your questions. Oh let's go back to the start. Running in circles, coming in tails. Heads on a science apart." The corners of your lips turned upwards as Eridan's tears slowed down a reasonable amount, his big blue eyes full of wonder as he stared at you, and after humming through an instrumental, you sang the last notes, a smile across your face as the words cascaded gracefully out. "Tell me you love me, come back and haunt me. Oh and I rush to the start. Running in circles, chasing our tails. Coming back as we are." You smiled once more before you fell against Eridan, wrapping your arms around his torso as you buried your face in his neck. "I love you."

**Eridan Amporaa**: "I love you too." You sniffled loudly. "Thank you." Your voice trembled, but you didn't cry. You've done enough crying for tonight. You needed to save them for tomorrow, since you knew you were going to cry a shit ton. "That was beautiful, your voice is beyond beautiful Kar." You could listen to him sing all day and all night if he could. God damn.

**Karkat Vantas**: You smiled and buried your face deeper into his neck, your arms hung loosely around his torso and you felt extremely comfortable in his arms. "I wrote that song for you, y'anno." You smile, bringing your face away from his neck to smile at him, wiping the last remaining tears from his cheeks. "Remember when we had that falling out? Longer now than it seems, but I had a bad habit of writing multiple songs a day, and that one was one of the last that I wrote. I was in a pretty bad place then and singing and writing seemed like the only way to get my feelings out without taking things drastically." You sighed and once again began to play with Eridan's hair. "And I was just wondering, do you think I could maybe come with you to see Fef tomorrow? We used to be pretty close, and I haven't seen her in a while. Come to speak of it, how is she?"

**Karkat Vantass**: "Kar, Fef passed away four years ago." You blinked rapidly, hoping to not let those tears fall again. "If you really want to come with me, be my guest. I usually go alone, and sometimes Cro comes with me.." You sighed shakily. You weren't ready to explain to Kar how she died. It was unsettling for you.

**Karkat Vantas**: You blinked blankly at Eridan, your eyes wide as your hands dropped from around his torso. "Oh." You whispered, sliding off of Eridan's lap and collapsing into the cushions beside him. But that was when the harsh reality came crashing down on you, and your eyes widened once again, but this time, with tears brimming around the edges. "No." You whispered, "No, No, No." Your hand came crashing down over your mouth, causing a muffled sob to escape through your fingers. "I- I didn't even get a chance to say goodbye." Your nails dug into your jeans as you folded your knees up to your chest, your body shaking. Feferi was your best friend, she was your only friend when you lived where you previously did. Nobody other than Feferi even bothered with the 'freak'. But she didn't care, she loved you with every slice of your being, and you loved her back. She was honestly the first person who had understood your problems, and still loved you for the bad things you had done, and to think you thought she hated you. But that wasn't the case was it. The reason she stopped messaging you was because she fucking died, and you felt like an absolute idiot to not know that. Even though you thought Feferi was not willing to keep in touch with you anymore, you always held a small amount of hope that she would fill your mind with life once again, and now you knew that that sliver of hope you held, was no longer existent and with another choked sob, you stood up and rushed to your bedroom, collapsing into a heap on the floor right beside your bed. No, you couldn't deal with this right now.

**Eridan Ampora**: You followed Kar into his bedroom, and knelt down before him. "I'm so sorry Kar, I'm so sorry that she's dead." _Its all my fault._ you wanted to add, but you didn't knowing that that wasn't necessary. "I never realized you guys were close." You said with so much sorrow laced in your words, "I'm just as upset as you are, I think we should go to sleep and visit her tomorrow, okay?"

**Karkat Vantas**: You sighed and nodded, pulling yourself to your feet as tears continued to fall. You reluctantly slipped underneath your covers, burying your face into Eridan's chest the second he curled against your side, and you let out an exasperated groan that sounded more like a sob than a groan, using the back of your hand to wipe your tears. "I'm sorry, I don't mean to be reacting like this. But she was my best friend, and one day she just stopped responding to my calls and my texts and I thought she hated me, I blamed myself for everything. That was why I started cutting, because I thought the only person I had ever brought myself to love to that extent at that time, had left me like everybody else had, and I didn't know what to do. But now I realize that there was nothing I could've done to prevent it." You sniffled loudly and clung to Eridan's shirt with everything you had. "I'm so sorry." You sigh, focusing your mind away from the problem, and onto ceasing your shaking.

**Eridan Ampora**: "I'm the one that should be sorry..." You wanted to say more but you were just so tired, you felt so drowsy. And at that you fell asleep, dreaming of rainy days, big trucks and blood.

**Karkat Vantas**: You couldn't bring yourself to respond to Eridan's statements, and only moments later he had fallen asleep in your arms. Eridan was surely not the one to blame for the passing of his sister, but you really could not oppose until you learned of what happened, so with a sigh, you burrowed yourself deeper into his chest, your mind running with unnecessary thoughts as you let one last tear slip from your eyes before falling into unconsciousness.

**Eridan Ampora**: For once you woke up before Karkat. Most likely from how you fell asleep and what visuals you saw. You shivered. It was horrible. You got up and went to the bathroom and took a quick shower, trying to bring yourself at ease. But of course that didn't work, all you did was accomplish cleaning yourself. Wow, what an achievement. You wrapped a towel around your waist and headed off to go get some clothes from your room, you needed to look your best, even if she really wasn't there to judge you on how you looked like. It's like the olden days.

**Karkat Vantas**: You woke up the moment the warmth from where Eridan was laying at your side disappeared completely, and you pulled the pillow he was using close to your body, just wanting to breathe some part of him in to reassure you of what was happening today. You wanted to be alright with the situation, but you couldn't bring yourself to do so as you stood up, setting yourself out a pair of dress pants and a while dress shirt. You were extremely surprised that it wasn't stained somewhere and you decided that a shower could wait until you got back from visiting Fef, and with that you pulled your black t-shirt over your head and dropped it to the floor, before you worked on looking your best and styling your hair in an 'Eridan Acceptable' way before you made your way to find him. You could really go for a hug right now.

**Eridan Ampora**: You quickly put on some nice pants, not bothering to put on a shirt, knowing you needed to eat something, and you didn't want to stain the shirt you wanted to. You picked out the shirt you wanted to wear and placed it on your bed. Your hair was still wet, and it dripped down your back in an uncomfortable matter. You shrugged it off and headed to the kitchen to get yourself some breakfast.

**Karkat Vantas**: When you heard the smell of food cooking, you nearly cringed. You still weren't recovered from the weeks you had gone without food, and you just weren't hungry. You made your way into the kitchen and found a shirtless Eridan bent over the stove, you couldn't even bring yourself to smirk at the scarred and exposed body of your fiancè as you sat down at the table, your face falling lightly against the wood of the kitchen table. Sudden nausea was never a big thing to you, but waking up feeling like you were going to throw up and having that feeling last was never a good thing to have to deal with. You let out a barely audible groan before you hid your face with your hands, just wanting the day to be over already.

**Eridan Ampora** joined the chat 17 hours ago

**Eridan Ampora**: "Good morning Karkat, would you care for a quick bite of some breakfast before we leave shortly?" You asked, not wanting to cry in front of him and bring up Fefs name. You just wanted to focus on your tasks right now and not cry over her. Even though you were an emotional train wreck.

**Karkat Vantas**: You shook your head. "No, I feel nauseous and I'm not hungry in general. Thanks anyway." you frown and drop your gaze, you could see how distressed this made you and it felt as if your heart was going to break in two, you knew today was going to be emotional, but you knew you weren't going to be the one suffering in this situation. "I love you, Eridan." you burst out suddenly, not knowing where the sudden need to say it came from, but before Eridan could react you brought your focus to the ring on your finger.

**Karkat Vantas** joined the chat 6 hours ago

**Eridan Amporaa**: "I-I lov-ve you too." You said, very confused. Your stutter coming back, which annoyed the living shit out of you. But you knew why it came back, because today was the day that everything was going to breakdown, and it was going to be hell. You brought your attention on your cooking, scooping the small portions onto a plate for yourself. Plopping it down on the table and sitting beside Karkat.

**Karkat Vantas**: You took notice in the return of Eridan's stutter, and you were semi confused by its reappearance since it seemed to had all but disappeared a few weeks ago. "You know, I still think your stutter is the most adorable thing ever. You don't have to hide it around me, you know." You smile softly, though not genuinely as you scoot your chair over a bit, resting your cheek against Eridan's bare shoulder, just wanting to take solace in the moments you had here before it all collapsed into rubble later on.

**Eridan Amporaa**: "I know-w it's just that, I w-was so used to it, it came naturally to hide it. But w-when Cro called, and all of that shit w-went dow-wn, it came back. And I'm really confused about it, to be honest." You said with a shake of your head. Everything you did left you in a puzzled matter. You stared at your plate and prodded at the egg. Taking a bit from it and placing it in your mouth.

**Karkat Vantas**: You had a strong urge to run your fingers through Eridan's hair, but due to the wetness of it, you decided not to and left it alone. "Is Cronus coming with us today, or is he heading over later?" you question. "Because I remember him saying somethimg yesterday about coming over after he grabbed a few things." you shrugged your shoulder, unaware if the information was true or not.

**Eridan Amporaa**: "I'm not sure, he has his ow-wn car and he know-ws w-what time w-we're leav-vin' at. So if w-we see him, w-we see him?" You said in between bites. Not sure if Cronus would be there, he didn't come last year though. His actions were always a mystery; you never know what he might do. You finished your breakfast and sighed. Not sure how to feel about your brother at the moment.

**Karkat Vantas**: You were the one to take care of Eridan's plate after he had left to go get a shirt on, and you jumped on the opportunity to clean something because it would help you get your mind off everything that was surging through your brain. When Eridan returned, you couldn't help but sigh inwardly. This was _so _hard on him, and you hated not being able to help him, not able to numb the pain even the slightest, but that was what happened when something would never exist again, because some things just don't come back after they leave. Some people just don't fucking come back, no matter how much you need them or long for them, it's not physically possible. You shoved on your shoes, Eridan following after you and the only words you manage to utter were a small. "Let's go." Before you headed out the door, locking it behind the two of you. "Everything's going to be alright, Eri. We'll do this together."

**Eridan Amporaa**: "Of course." You reach out and grab his hand, entwining your fingers in his. "Could w-we w-walk there instead of driv-vin' there? I just think it w-would be better to." Your eyebrows furrowed together, you squeezed your eyes shut. You practically pleaded to yourself to not cry, not yet. Not when you were walking in public.

**Karkat Vantas**: "I don't mind." You smile, smoothing your thumb repetitively over the back of Eridan's hand, as you hummed softly to help not only yourself; but Eridan too. You could see the tell-tale signs that he was close to his breaking point, and all you could do to try to make things easier was humming to yourself pathetically, the small noise escaping you probably doing absolutely no good against the circumstances that stood. "I'm not going to lie, but I'm... actually really scared to do this.." You sigh, biting your lip and looking away from Eridan's face, watching the pavement as you walked. You felt so helpless.

**Eridan Amporaa**: "I am too, I'v-ve done this for years and I'm still scared." You shook your head, anything to get rid of the tears. The feeling that you always held this day, lingered in your stomach. It was almost like butterflies swarming in there. The awful nervousness, guilt, and sadness were not what you needed right now, but it's what you always felt. You squeezed Kar's hand, hoping to distract yourself, and to maybe focus on his humming, but that stopped. You felt so awful.

**Karkat Vantas**: "I understand, the pain must be ten times as hard for you as it is for me, you don't just 'get over' something like that. It truly does take time. A bond like that being broken is something extremely hard to get over, and I just.." You sighed deeply, stepping closer to Eridan as you tightened your fingers on his hand. "I just can't believe she's gone. Once upon a time, she was my everything. Once upon a time, she was my only friend, the only one who gave a flying fuck about me. And.." Your breathing caught in your throat as you decided whether or not it would be best to drop this huge piece of information on him. "Once upon a time, we were in a relationship that none of us spoke of to anyone other than ourselves."

A/N;

Hey all of you people reading this, this is a psa to say that chatzy (the client me and brianna use to write this) is a little fucking bitch and deleted everything that we had after this point, and to say the least it was a shit ton of writing. So the next part will not fucking make sense at all but to clear things out they're now at Fef's grave i think,or well almost


	20. Oxygen

**Karkat Vantas**: You pause your walk the second you notice a tear slipping down his cheek and you spin him around to look at you, resting your hands on his chest as you sighed. "I tried my hardest, and gave her everything she deserved. I did the best for her so I could have the chance to meet you guys someday, because she always spoke about how her brothers would never accept somebody like me, and she hid it because she was scared either you or Cronus would do something irrational, and I understood it without question. When she stopped replying to me I took that as she had told one of you and I was never allowed to see her again, or she hated me and never wanted to speak to me again. I sided with the second option and soon enough her memory became a dull ache that I wanted to go away, or at least get some closure on. And now I've found my closure. I've found my closure in my new beginning with you. I love you, Eridan. And I'm so sorry I hadn't told you before." You wrapped your arms loosely around his neck as you leant forward and pressed a kiss to his nose, wishing that that tiny kiss could make all of Eridan's pain go away.

**Eridan Amporaa**: You were speechless. Well, not really. "Karkat, that makes no sense. You w-were my only friend? I nev-ver really considered anyone as my friend. The only thing I nev-ver knew-w w-was that my sister had a boyfriend." You said hesitantly, feeling the warm tears trail down your cheek. "Let's...Let's just go already. No need to waste time." You said slithering away at Kar's touch and walking in the direction of the cemetery.

**Karkat Vantas**: The golden ring suddenly hung very heavy on your finger as you watched Eridan's retreating back get farther and farther away from you. You balled your hands into fists and bit your lip, hoping that the force you applied to your lip would stunt the tears that fell down your face, and much to your dismay. The odds didn't work in your favor, and your body shook as you followed behind Eridan, keeping quite a distance away as you pause occasionally to wipe tears from your face and sniffle. Everything was falling apart, for the both of you.

**Eridan Amporaa**: You put your hands in your pockets, kept your head down and let the tears fall. You really didn't need this at the moment. Why would Karkat... Never mind, you didn't need to think about it more. Your whole body was shaking when you got there. And then you broke down completely. Remembering everything crystal clear. Your emotions were off the charts.

**Karkat Vantas**: You fought against the urge to fall down beside Eridan, to hold him close and tell him that everything was going to be okay. He probably didn't want you to touch him, he probably didn't want you here at all.

**Karkat Vantas**: So you stood back a sizable distance, sniffling and wiping your tears away with the back of your hand before you decided to do something past anything sane you had ever done before. You were going to visit your Mum.

Eridan Ampora: The tears came streaming down your face, just like a waterfall. Your sobs were uncontrollable. Four years and you still couldn't get over it. You knew it wasn't easy getting over things like these, but with your sobs being this tremendous, it was awful. Just remembering the awful crash. If she was still alive, she probably would've hated you. It was your fault after all. You knelt down in front of the tombstone. Oh, Fef. If only you could kiss it all better.

Eridan Ampora: The tears came streaming down your face, just like a waterfall. Your sobs were uncontrollable. Four years and you still couldn't get over it. You knew it wasn't easy getting over things like these, but with your sobs being this tremendous, it was awful. Just remembering the awful crash. If she was still alive, she probably would've hated you. It was your fault after all. You knelt down in front of the tombstone. Oh, Fef. If only you could kiss it all better.

Karkat Vantas: Your back pressed firmly against the cold marble of your mother's headstone, your breathing was erratic and out of place, and a frown was pressed across your lips. You knew this day was bad, but you didn't expect it to be this bad. When you heard a faint voice, your eyes widened and your head darted around, glancing around at the empty graveyard your eyebrows furrowed in confusion. The voice echoed again, the familiar windchime like voice causing you to stand up and spin in circles, spinning in circles to find the culprit pulling the sick prank on you. Feferi's voice spiraled through your head once again and you fell to your knees, blocking your ears with your fingers. The effort didn't stop the pleading call of her voice, "Eridan, please don't cry. You're going to be okay!" She chirped, her voice laced with worry. You stood up once again, ignoring the dirt stains that appeared on your dress pants. "None of this was your fault, I'm not gone because of you. Nothing could've stopped what happened!" her voice was pleading in your ears and you choked back a sob, she sounded so upset, and you could only clamp a hand over your mouth and lean against an unfamiliar grave. "Karkat! Karkat! Can you hear me?" your eyes widened once again and you nodded your head, not moving your hand. "I still love you, I'll always love you. But you need to move on, and you need to help Eridan do the same." you nodded your head once again, another sob escaping your lips once again. "I promise." you whisper into thin air, hoping she could hear you. "I love you, Karkat. But I have to go. Thank you." she whispers, and in a split second you felt a feather light kiss press to your cheek, one that you had experienced many times before. With a body that was growing weak, you made your way to Eridan's side, dropping to your knees beside him. You hesitantly wrapped an arm around his back, even if he didn't want you there, you needed to be there for him.

Eridan Ampora: All you could do was repeat the same words over and over again in your mind. I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. You felt Karkat's arms wrap around you and you sighed. You weren't mad at him, not at all. "I'm sorry." You said, directing it towards Karkat and Feferi. You missed her so much, you just wanted to see her once again, hear her voice. But of course, you couldn't, it was too late. You couldn't get her back and you needed to realize that fact.

Karkat Vantas: You just shook your head and knelt in front of Eridan, pulling him against your chest and pressing your lips against his forehead. Eridan had nothing to be sorry for. He hadn't done anything wrong and whatever had been done hadn't been his fault; Even Feferi knew that. "I'm the one who should be sorry, I should have told you earlier. Or at least picked a better day." you sigh, pressing your lips against his hair, rubbing soothing circles against his back. "I love you, please don't cry." you pulled back and rested your forehead against his, pressing a kiss to his nose as you wiped his tears away softly.

**Eridan Ampora**: "I lov-ve you too Kar." Was all you could choke out. You sniffled, and wiped your own eyes. Today was not a good, at all. All of those terrifying memories. The broken glass, her little scream of pain, the blood. All of the little things you could remember. The look of pure shock that lingered on her still body. It was, awful, awful, awful.

**Karkat Vantas**: "I'm going to guess that there's a reason that you wanted to walk here, or well. Want to walk everywhere in general." you state, not breaking your hold on him as you pressed another simple kiss to his forehead. "What happened wasn't your fault Eridan, it wasn't anybody's fault. If Feferi was alive, she wouldn't blame you. She loves you to much to even fathom blaming you. I knew her well enough to know that she wouldn't do something like that. She still loves you, Eridan." You didn't want to tell him about hearing Fef only moments ago, so you tried to sooth him, as well as you could.

**Karkat Vantas**: You broke your hold around Eridan's body when you caught sight of Cronus climbing up the hill, in his hands a bouquet of freshly trimmed roses and a small box in the other. You stood up and wiped your eyes, coughing lightly to make sure that your voice would work. "Hi, Cronus." you smiled, nodding politely as you wiped your eyes once again. He nodded his head back and patted Eridan on the back affectionately as he rested the bouquet against Fef's gravestone. "I brought you something I forgot to bring yesterday, and maybe an unexpected surprise." Cronus smiled, handing the reasonably sized box towards you. "Happy Birthday, doll."

**Eridan Amporaa**: Your eyebrows shot up. What could have Cronus gotten him? It could be anything ranging from a prank or something sentimental. It was always a surprise with him. As Karkat opened the box you gasped really fucking loudly. A wave of emotions hit you so fucking hard. To sad to confused; to frustrated and sad again. Your emotions were everywhere. It was Fef's bracelet, from once upon a time. Simpler times, really.

**Karkat Vantas**: "Cronus, it's beautiful. But I'm really confused." You glanced at Eridan when he gasped, feeling like you were the center of attention in the midst of your misunderstanding. "That used to be Feferi's bracelet, before you passed. I thought Eridan would appreciate me givin' it to you instead of it being in the hands of our father." You placed the bracelet gingerly back in the box, one singular hand covering your neck. "No, I can't take this, it's too important to you." You shook your head and attempted to hand the box back, only having Cronus pick the bracelet out of the box, sticking out his hand for your wrist. "I know Feferi would want you to have this, besides, Eridan has the companion piece." With a light wince, you held out your wrist, and Cronus fastened the bracelet against your cool skin, allowing the silver chain to fall against your skin. "I-I really don't know what to say." You chuckle nervously as you watch Cronus take back the box, and remove the amount of foam where the bracelet once rested. "C'mon now, you think that's all you'd get from your soon-to-be big brother?" He handed the box back to you, and within seconds you had launched yourself at Cronus, wrapping your arms around his built torso as you thanked him, over and over again.

**Eridan Amporaa**: You smiled shyly. Not sure what to do at times like this. You never knew what to do. The exchange between Cro and Kar was really sweet, and you wanted to join in on their happiness, but you couldn't force yourself to smile for real.

**Karkat Vantas**: You smiled happily and pulled away from Cronus, getting an affectionate pat on the head by him as you knelt down in front of Eridan, a small smile on his face as you pulled one of the two matching necklaces out of the box. You took a moment to examine it, the beautiful charm was of the Cancer zodiac sign tangled with the Aquarius zodiac and you couldn't help but smile and you unhooked it, leaning over slightly to wrap latch the necklace around his neck. You leant forward and wrapped your arms around Eridan, continuing with the tradition of pressing a soft kiss to his nose as you hugged him softly. "Do you want to go home now, or do you want to stay here a little while longer?" You question, your forehead pressed against Eridan's. "You guys are so gay." Cronus jokes, running a hand through his surprisingly ungreased hair. "Yeah, no fucking shit." You snickered back, a small smile across your lips.

**Eridan Amporaa**: "Let's just go home." You sighed, standing back up. Brushing off your knees. _See you soon Fef._ You mentally said to her gravestone. Hoping somehow she heard you. But of course she didn't, there was no such things as ghosts or spirits.

**Karkat Vantas**: _See you soon, Eridan _As Feferi's words slowly drifted through your mind, you smiled and grabbed a hold of Eridan's hands, giving him a small reassuring smile. "Are you coming with us, Cronus?" Cronus nodded his head. "I might as well drive you guys back." You glance at Eridan hesitantly and he just nods sharply, you sigh inwardly. You hated seeing Eridan like this. "Is someone gonna call shotgun, or?" You shook your head, and so did Eridan. "I'm pretty sure the both of us are going to be in the back." Cronus nods and presses the button to unlock the doors of his car, and you force Eridan inside before you, you settling yourself in the middle seat directly beside him, immediately resting your head on his shoulder after you buckle up. Soon enough, you found yourself stopped at a red light, a truck in front of you that seemed to be making Eridan quite skittish. In a attempt to calm him down, you pressed a soft kiss to the neck, only getting swatted away in the process. "Don't worry, Eridan it's going to be fine. Nothing's going to happen." But it seems that Cronus spoke too soon, because within seconds, one of the belts that was holding the pipe in place fell out of place, and one came crashing down through the windshield.

**Eridan Amporaa**: Déjà vu is what happened. The same pipe came crashing through the window, same side and everything. You were out of breath when the pipe came towards you at a scary speed. Stopping mere inches from your chest. Your breathing now heavy instead of barely there and heart pounding. Holy shit, that just happened. That just fucking happened. You were frozen in place, speechless.

**Karkat Vantas**: Your hand reached out to touch Eridan's chest, the place where that fucking pipe would have gone through if it hadn't been stopped by some unseen force. You couldn't bring yourself to speak, your heart was a banging drum in your chest and your throat tightened almost painfully. Cronus stood frozen in his seat too, and your eyes were as wide as fucking plates as you heard the familiar ring of police cars rushing towards you at a fast rate, even one ambulance siren could be heard through it all. You nearly had a panic attack when you were pulled away from Eridan by a police officers, as they refused to let him leave the confines of the car until they had cleared the pipe from in front of him. You tried to protest against the strong grip that held your shoulders, wanting to run back into the car and wait beside Eridan, but you were in complete shock, your body trembling as you were handed off to Cronus, his arms wrapping protectively around your body. "He's going to be fine." Cronus shakily stuttered, his hand carefully petting your hair in the same way Eridan often did when you were upset. You could tell that Cronus was on the verge of a panic attack himself as you felt his own body shaking underneath you, and you slowly raised your arms to tighten around his torso, you needed some form of support right now, as you glanced back at Eridan through the smashed front window. And Cronus was doing one hell of a job at supplying it.

**Eridan Amporaa**: So many things happened at once. The flashing of red and blue, the noises around you, Kar being taken away from you. It was all too much. Your heart started beating faster, you started sweating but you felt so cold. Everything was all a big blur. You weren't ready for this. You were in shock and you had no idea how you felt about it. A dizzy feeling swept over you. And then blackness. Eridan Ampora just fainted.

**Karkat Vantas**: As you watched Eridan fall limp against the seat, you let out a cry and tried to break from Cronus's grip, but as Cronus caught sight of what you were fighting for, he held you back. His grip tightening around your body and not allowing you to run anywhere. "Let go of me! He's hurt damn it! Let me see him!" You shouted, continuously trying to break free from his hold. But the much taller man was not letting go. Your lips let out another cry as you saw an ambulance technician running over a stretcher, but Cronus still refused to let go. You didn't know what was happening, you didn't know what was happening to Eridan, and Cronus wouldn't let you go. Your eyes filled with tears as you finally gave up the struggle, your knees giving out beneath you, Cronus assisting you into sitting down properly against the concrete. _Oh god, please Eridan. Be okay, please. For me, be okay._

**Eridan Amporaa**: You were knocked out, but your heart started beating faster and faster gradually. What the hell was going on? Where were you going? The hospital? All you could see was blackness. _Karkat where are you, I need you._ You tried moving around but you couldn't. It was like your body was paralyzed. Maybe it was. You had no way of finding out. _Kar...?_

**Karkat Vantas**: Cronus eventually let you go, and you stumbled your way over to the ambulance, making soundless grabs at Eridan, but before you could gain the courage to ask to see him, something went wrong. His heart-rate was speeding twice the amount that was normal for the everyday human being._Eridan! _You shouted mentally, unable to make your voice be heard. "I'm going to need you to step back, son. We need to take this man to the hospital immediately." The older man who was helping Eridan stated, but before you could ask to climb on board, the doors slammed shut and the ambulance had taken off. You stumbled backwards before you fell to your knees. _Oh god, this is all my fault! Eridan, please!_

**Eridan Amporaa**: Your senses were shutting off. You couldn't hear anything, you couldn't smell or feel anything around you. Your thoughts were your only hope as your heart kept pounding away, at a terrifying speed. Why is this happening. What even happened. _Karkat, please be by my side. Tell me I'm okay._ You felt like crying but you couldn't. It felt like you were trapped in ice, unable to move. This was awful. All you wanted was Karkat. _Hold my hand, say anything to me. I just want to see you again. Hear you again. __**Anything**_.

**Karkat Vantas**: Just when you needed a fucking car, something like this happened. You let out a shout as Cronus pulled you against him once again, trying to shoosh your cries as he held you close. You began to panic as he started patting your pockets but you realized as soon as he pulled it out, that he was looking for your phone. He managed to find your contacts, and find Kankri's number. Before he held you closer and pressed the phone to his ear. Your sobs were the only thing you could focus on as Cronus desperately begged Kankri to pick the two of you up. _Eridan, please. You're going to be alright. __**You have to be alright. **__Please don't die, whatever you do, don't. _He couldn't do this to you. Your mind was completely blank as you found your self pulled into Kankri's car, and strapped in to a panicking Cronus. When you reached the hospital, you struggled free of your seat but the second you came in contact with the concrete your knees gave out. Kankri ended up throwing his arm around you as Cronus stood at the front. "I'm lookin' for Eridan Ampora." Cronus stuttered, his voice uneven and weak. "I'm sorry, sir. But I'm not permitted to let you see him." you felt as if that golden ring was going to burn through your fingers as you hung to Kankri like he was your lifeline. "I don't think you understand the circumstances. I _need _to see Eridan. His fiancè is going to have a mental breakdown if he does not see Eridan in less than ten minutes. He can't even focus on anything that's how fuckin' scared he is. So please." he made sure nobody was looking before he shoved a wad of cash in her direction. "Please? For me?" "Oh for gods sake Cronus, was that honestly necessary?" Kankri questioned as you attempted at wiping the tears from your eyes. "Well, I'm looking out for both my brothers here, can you cut me a lil' slack?" he questioned as he followed the nurse closely. Oh god, you did not have a good feeling about this.

**Eridan Amporaa**: Everything stopped for a second. Sort of like a flat line. Everything was squiggly and then flat. Even your thoughts stopped. Is this what death feels like? No, this can't be. You were just dreaming and none of this was happening. Everyone was okay, Feferi was still alive, there was no car crash. You got to see Karkat again, everything was okay. But it wasn't. You were almost dead. You knew it. _Pathetic._

**Karkat Vantas**: The second you approached Eridan's room, you pushed the door open, tears falling freely from your eyes when you were pushed back by a black haired nurse, her gloved hands pressed up against your chest. "You can't be in here!" she shouted, the commotion of the room behind you terrifying you. "No please!" you pleaded quietly. "I need to see him!" you shouted, pushing back against her. You couldn't believe this was happening, not now, not again! Eridan couldn't die on you, he couldn't!

**Eridan Amporaa**: You felt as if your heart was beating out of your chest when the flat line ended and you were back to the craziness of it all. Your oxygen felt limited, and you started breathing heavily trying to get as much oxygen as you could. _I need to see Karkat again. Cronus? Feferi? Anybody._ You tried to wriggle around and this time you could. But a sensation surged through you and you fell limp. This time you didn't faint.

**Karkat Vantas**: "The patient is sedated, he's going to be fine. This should help slow down his heart rate." one of the nurses announced, causing you to let out a sigh and step back into Cronus. "Can he see him now?" Cronus asked, nodding to you impatiently. The nurse nodded her head reluctantly and stepped out of the way. The second the way was cleared you dashed to Eridan's side. Taking hold of his hand and pressing it against your face, in relief that you could finally touch him. With a small sob you lifted yourself onto the bed beside him, burying your face into his chest, tears still falling down your face. "I love you. I love you. I love you." you whisper over and over, holding him as close as you could possibly get him. You took this time to finally place the necklace Cronus had given you over your neck, before burrowing back into Eridan's side, knowing that you wouldn't be able to sleep even if you tried.

**Eridan Amporaa**: Once you woke up, everything was a daze. You tried to open up your eyes, but the light burned through your sight, so you kept your eyes closed. You felt somebody beside you, and smiled. Knowing it was Karkat; you wrapped your arm around him, squeezing his shoulder lightly. "_I Love you._" You whispered your voice groggy.

**Karkat Vantas**: "I-I could've lost you." you sighed, your voice weak and uneven. Currently you were happy that Cronus and Kankri had gone to get something to eat, so you could speak to Eridan in private. "They pulled me away from me and told me to get away before I could ask to get in the ambulance with you. I didn't know if you were dead or not so I panicked, Cronus has to fucking restrain me that's how terrified I was." your arms tightened around him as you started to cry once again, your eyes running pathetically as you clung to Eridan's side. "I'm sorry, I'm being absolutely pathetic right now."

**Eridan Amporaa**: "You're not being pathetic, Kar." You sighed, not liking to hear him cry. You tried to calm him down by rubbing his shoulder. How do you even do the comfort thing? "It's okay now. I'm okay. _We're okay._" Your voice was barely above a whisper, since you felt so weak. Being in the hospital environment didn't help either. It just made you feel like you were on your death bed. The vibe you got was awful. You hated Hospitals.

**Karkat Vantas**: You couldn't stop the falling tears no matter how hard you tried, so all you did was tighten your grip on Eridan, clinging to him like a small child did to their mother. "I'm still so scared. Because I was too weak to even fucking walk after they slammed the door in my face and took off with you, so after Kankri picked us up he had to practically carry me inside and the whole time I kept running through the worst case-scenario. They didn't even tell me what the fuck was going on before they took off. I just imagined what I would have done if something had happened to you and I didn't fucking-." you cut yourself off and tighten your hand around Eridan's, just needing this closeness.

**Eridan Amporaa**: A tear slid down your face. "Kar, please." You shifted your weight so you were laying down on our side, bringing him closer to you, planting a kiss on his forehead, petting his hair back. You blinked back any other tears. "Don't be scared. Everything is going to be okay. We'll get married, let all of those horrible things slide past us and we'll live a happy life." You reassured him, smiling. You still couldn't believe you were getting married to this wonderful man.

**Karkat Vantas**: "Okay, you win. Now I'm excited." you chuckled, wrapping your arms loosely around his waist, your head resting against his shoulder as you wiped your tears away. "My sisters already bought their fucking dresses." you chuckle, smiling and pressing a kiss to the corner of Eridan's lips. "Oh." you sighed, pulling back slightly. "That reminds me, I had something to ask you particularly about the wedding."

**Eridan Amporaa**: You weren't surprised that Nep and Meulin got their dresses already, and you couldn't help but chuckle. "What is it, Kar?" You asked, smiling at the thought of their wedding. You were so excited.

**Karkat Vantas**: Now that that adorable fucking smile was across his face, you wanted so badly to take back asking him whatsoever, but it needed to be done. "I'm sorry if this comes off rude or anything, I don't really mean to be an asshole about this situation. But can I request that we.. not have alcohol at the wedding..? " You questioned, fluttering your eyes closed because you were afraid of his answer or his retaliation. So you kept your eyes close, not moving from his side as you stay partially frozen.

**Eridan Amporaa**: You furrowed your eyebrows, not sure how to react to that question. But knowing what needed to be said. "I-I agree; no alcohol." You smiled a bit. You needed to stop drinking, for both of your guys' sake. You hated seeing him in pain, and you knew it most of it was from you, and it made you feel like shit.

**Karkat Vantas**: You let out a breath you didn't know you were holding and you smiled, tightening your hold on Eridan once again. "Thank-you." you smile, leaning over and pressing a soft kiss to his lips. "I want you to know, that it _isn't _just because of you, It's because of my Dad. Even with his alzheimers, I'm unsure if he will have the same reaction he had when I was younger when under the influence. I'm scared that things might not have changed, and I don't want to risk_anyone _getting hurt." You smile, rolling onto Eridan's chest with a smile across your lips, once again finding the dimples on his cheeks. "I'm still not fucking over these."

**Eridan Amporaa**: "Oh my god." You rolled your eyes. "So you've found them again." You chuckled, wrapping your arms around his waist. "But yes, nobody should get hurt at our wedding. And anyways, you wouldn't want to see Cronus drunk." You chuckled slightly, remembering how you used to see Cronus come back home from one of his high-school parties, hammered. It was actually pretty amusing.

**Karkat Vantas**: "Oh, you know I'm not going to lie. I can think of Cronus as one of those happy drunks, who just wants to spread the love and won't hurt a fly. So I actually do really want to see that. Believe it or not, when Cronus isn't trying to be somebody who he's not, I would take a wild guess and say that he's one of those cuddly guys. And I really like people like that, cuddles are honestly the fucking best, especially from somebody you look up to or are really close to." You smile, smiling before getting back to poking Eridan's dimples, a silly smile playing across your lips. "But I love your cuddles the most."

**Eridan Amporaa**: "That's a good thing. Wouldn't want to have any competition." You winked up at him and smiled like a mad man. Even if you were in a hospital bed, you were extremely happy. Having a happy Karkat, is always a good thing. Very good thing. It's like his happiness radiates onto you. And right now, you couldn't be any more happier. You couldn't help but giggle, he was so adorable. You didn't care if that wasn't manly. Not right now anyways. It was just you and Karkat in the room, so it didn't really matter.

**Karkat Vantas**: You smiled, your body lax against Eridan's. But he made no move to push you away as you brushed his messy hair back repeatedly, the tiny smile never leaving your lips. "But god, if I ever have to see something like what happened today again, I'm never going to speak again. I promise you that." you chuckle, poking his nose with your pointer finger. "I've never had a reaction as bad as the one I experienced today to something traumatic. I'm going to have to apologize to Cronus later." you groaned, dropping your head against his chest. "But through everything that's happened today, I'm surprised I'm as happy as I am." you smile softly as your hand comes to rest against his collarbone. This day wasn't as bad as it started off to be.

**Eridan Amporaa**: Your face went to worried then softened up again. He must be kidding with the whole not talking shit. Right? At least he was happy, and that's all you wanted right now. Just happiness. You didn't want to deal with all of the demons you two had. Not at all. You sighed in relief,or maybe just holding in that breath, because of reasons. "Well, today was... Interesting?"

**Karkat Vantas**: "Well, there are many words to describe it, and that definitely isn't one of them." you chuckled, rolling off of Eridan's body and once again curling into his side, a soft smile across your lips. "I'm gonna be honest, but I really can't wait to get the hell out of here, I want to just lay on the couch and watch cat videos for the rest of my life." You sigh, reaching your hand down to connect with Eridan's intertwining your fingers with his. "Just kidding, even though cats are really cute I doubt I'd be able to watch shit like that for less than ten minutes without having to do something violent to feel manly again." you chuckle, this was the most content you had felt in a while, and you didn't want it to go away.

**Eridan Amporaa**: "If I'm correct, I might have to stay here for a couple more hours, just to see if my heart will start reacting again since it could start happening again. I don't even know how that makes sense though." You shrugged slightly as you laid in your back, exhausted. Having your heart beating too fast was a work out itself. But you couldn't help but have a chuckle escape your lips as Kar kept rambling about cats and manliness

**Karkat Vantas**: "Yes, you are correct. You have something called an arrhythmia. They are very common and even I myself have them. Most of the time, they are harmless and happen in healthy people free of heart disease. However, some abnormal heart rhythms can be serious or even deadly. Some are _extremely serious_and could cause sudden cardiac death while others may be common and a pain in the ass but not life threatening. Right now they are suggesting that you have the less serious end of the deal, which means you may get out in a few hours, to a few days. But I'm sure everything is going to be fine and we'll get you the hell out of here today." You smile, running a finger along Eridan's side, interested in the pattern of his dress shirt. "They still aren't sure if any of what happened damaged any part of you, such as organs and other important things you kinda fuckin' need in life, so it might be a while, but Kurloz is once again working his hardest to help."

**Eridan Amporaa**: "Well that's great to know..." You said with a sigh. "Thank god it's not something serious." You couldn't help but cock an eyebrow up at Karkats knowledge on this stuff, it was impressive.

**Karkat Vantas**: "Even though I wish I could tell you more, I can't remember for the life of me." You sigh, smiling softly once again. Your thoughts got interrupted when you heard the door open, the familiar tone of your brother's voice echoing in and you sighed, rolling over to face them with your hand still connected with Eridan's. "Aw, well isn't it the most adorable couple in the world." Cronus chuckled, settling himself loosely into the chair close to the bed, Kankri sitting down beside him, in a more orderly fashion. "Cronus, you ought to sit up straight, you're going to absolutely ruin your posture." Kankri lectured as he glared at the man beside him, Cronus just chuckled and pushed it off. "I don't give a damn about my posture, I'm comfortable Kankri, so I'm stayin' like this." He sighed, a small smile still gracing his lips. "Have you collected yourself, kid?" Cronus questioned, furrowing his eyebrows at you. All you could do in response was nod.

**Eridan Amporaa**: You squeezed Karkats hand lightly, somehow thinking that would comfort him for no apparent reason. Then you finally realized something, the thing Cronus mentioned about a whole bunch of money. "Hey Cro, what did you mean by 'I have a lot of money now.'?" You asked, not sure how else to bring up the subject. You sat up facing Cro, getting sick and tired of just laying down.

**Karkat Vantas**: "Well, you know how when Mom died Dad told you that she had taken you out of her will?" Cronus questioned, getting a sharp nod in return. "Well, I did some of my own research and as it turns out, Dad's a lyin' sack a' shit and you inherited almost all of Mom's things. Meenah didn't even get very much from Mom." your eyes widen a sizable amount. "So, basically Eridan get's _everything _of hers?" you questioned, smoothing your thumb over Eridan's hand. "Seems like it."

**Eridan Amporaa**: "Holy shit.." You were in shock. You couldn't even fathom how much shit your mom used to have. Like she practically could own a whole fucking country with all of the money she had. And plus her jewellery. "Holy shit..." You repeated even louder. Still not sure how to react to this. _Wow, thanks mum._ you thought to yourself a small smile spread across your face. She probably didn't hear that but you know, it's the thought that counted.

**Karkat Vantas**: "When I say everything, Eri. I mean fuckin' everything. Her clothes, her furniture and even.." he slowed down his speech to glance at Eridan and you did the same. The smile on his face was absolutely heartwarming, and you squeezed his hand lightly before smiling. "Do you remember that cottage where we spent the summers just as a family?"

**Eridan Amporaa**: You gasped really fucking loudly. "Are you being fucking serious right now, or..." You relaxed and smiled, of course he was being serious, what couldn't be unreal these days anyway. "Yeah, I remember. Simpler times."

**Karkat Vantas**: "That's yours, and the land surroundin' it. It's all fuckin' yours. I was going to tell you at the wedding, but it seems that it just couldn't wait." Cronus smirks, obviously happy for his little brother. "Call me fucking stupid, but I'm still confused. What does this mean?" you turn to Eridan with a smile on your face. "What does this mean, for us?" your smile grew slightly and you let out a small laugh. Well, this day was getting better and better.

**Eridan Amporaa**: You smiled back at Karkat, this was the worst day, but possibly the best day ever. "Oh my god. Wait, doesn't this mean 'Dad' is in big shit! like as in he can go for jail like this lying to us or some shit?" You asked looking back at Cronus.

**Karkat Vantas**: "Yeah, and I'm leaving it up to you if ya' want to go to the police and whatnot. He could end up getting at least a year's time for this stunt." Cronus smirked, causing your eyebrows to furrow. "Are you going to do it?" you questioned, turning to Eridan with a glint in your eye. This could be your chance to destroy the horror known as Eugene Ampora.

**Eridan Amporaa**: "Yeah, I am. It's pretty obvious that I will." You shook your head, a determined look on your face. Hell fucking yeah you were. All of this pain he put you through, he's almost killed you multiple of times, and made you try to kill yourself multiple of times. This was an opportunity you weren't going to miss out on.

**Karkat Vantas**: You smiled and broke your hold on Eridan's hand, standing in front of Cronus and wiggling a finger to get him to stand up, and when he finally stood up, you attacked him in a hug. Perfectly manouvering one of your sister's famous 'tackle-hugs' without knocking him to the ground. "No problem, kid. And remember, if Eridan wants to, he can file abuse along with this, and I'll testify for him."

**Eridan Amporaa**: There were tears of joy streaming down your face. You got up and attacked him with a hug. "Thank you so much Cro, it means a lot." You practically sobbed into his shoulder. Holy shit, you were going to get justice on that sick bastard. How many times he violated you, he needed to go down.

**Karkat Vantas**: You had never seen Kankri look so confused in your life, he barely knew anything about Eridan. Finding out most of this stuff would have had you pretty confused if you hadn't been dating the guy for over a year. When Eridan broke the hug with Cronus, you once again pulled him against you and wiped his tears away, "I'm so proud of you." was the only thing you managed to say before you pulled him into a hug.

**Eridan Amporaa**: You couldn't say anything, only hug Karkat as tight as comfortable would take you. You clung to him, sobbing into his chest probably getting his shirt wet. But you didn't care.

**Karkat Vantas**: You had to force back some tears of your own as you laughed happily, feeling the watchful eyes of Kankri and Cronus on you. "Hey, I'mma head to go talk to the Doctor, see when we can get 'cha out of here." Cronus chuckled, patting Eridan on the back as he headed out the door. "I've seen so many couples in my existence, but so far I've never seen one as close and as adorable as you two." Kankri smiled for where he stood, legs and arms both crossed. "So, we broke your cute scale, eh?" you smirked, peeking your head out from around Eridan. "You can say so."


End file.
